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DEAR STACY: I would like to know if Gary Sinise of "C.S.I.: New York" is an amputee. I saw him in "Forrest Gump," and he didn't have any legs. -- Della J., Austin, Texas

DEAR DELLA: Sinise's appearance as an amputee in "Forrest Gump" was all due to the magic of special effects. Actually a quantum leap in the magic of special effects -- which earned the film a Best Visual Effects Academy Award in 1995, before Computer Generated Imagery (CGI) became familiar to moviegoers. Sinise's legs were wrapped in blue fabric and digitally removed scene by scene. However, having said that, "Dancing with the Stars'" Heather Mills has proven to the world that being an amputee doesn't have to be limiting. And there are working actors in Hollywood who are amputees such as Robert David Hall. The actor, who plays the coroner, Dr. Alan Robbins, on "CSI: Crime Scene Investigation," had both legs amputated in 1978 after a horrific car accident. Former "Highlander" and "Wiseguy" regular Jim Byrnes lost both his legs above the knee after being struck by a passing car while he helped a friend move a stalled truck in 1972. Both, like Mills, have learned to function quite normally and comfortably with prosthetics.

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DEAR STACY: Maybe you can help us fill in some information from a conversation among some friends about Alan Ladd. Is it true he committed suicide due to his unhappiness with his short stature? What was his actual height? -- David D., Rockaway Beach, N.Y.

DEAR DAVID: Ladd's height is generally believed to have been 5'6" -- though it has been reported as anywhere from 5'2" to 5'9". The "Shane" star died at age 50 of an overdose of sedatives mixed with alcohol. Two years earlier, he had attempted suicide by shooting himself. There were many factors behind it. Ladd had a hard, impoverished childhood. He witnessed his mother commit suicide with ant poison. It's been written that he went into a depression following the breakup of his romance with June Allyson in the late '50s. He also suffered lifelong low self-esteem. He was once asked what he would change about himself if he could, and famously responded "everything."

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DEAR STACY: We would like to know more about Clive Robertson of the MyNetwork TV show "Wicked, Wicked Games." -- Mrs. C. and Mrs. S., Brooklyn, N.Y.

DEAR MRS. C. AND MRS. S.: Robertson, 41, is divorced from Australian actress Libby Purvis and has a son and daughter, born in 2002. He's the son of a Royal Air Force fighter pilot, and grew up in locales including Singapore, Cyprus and the Netherlands before settling into boarding school in England at age 8. He earned a business degree at the University of Oxford, but left his marketing career and turned to drama school after a few years. Eventually he began landing parts on stage and in British TV shows. In 1996, he decided to visit Hollywood for a three-week vacation during which he wanted to check out career prospects -- and wound up with a role on Aaron Spelling's "Sunset Beach" daytime drama. (Make that two roles; he also played his character's twin brother.) He starred on the show for three years. Other credits include a voice role with Julia Roberts in "The Ant Bully" and the Canadian sci-fi series "Starhunter."

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DEAR STACY: Paris Hilton's mother was a child actress, correct? Have we heard of anything she appeared in? -- Melissa A., Cleveland

DEAR MELISSA: As Kathy Richards, the personality now known as Kathy Hilton, appeared at age 12 in an episode of "Family Affair," went on to guest roles on series including "Bewitched," "The Rockford Files" and "Happy Days" as a teen -- and at 20 appeared in the 1979 horror movie "The Dark" with William Devane. Her sisters, Kim ("Nanny and the Professor") and Kyle ("Halloween") were busier juvenile performers than she.

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DEAR STACY: Did JoBeth Williams fall off the face of the earth? I never could understand why they canceled "The Client." It was a smart show. -- Julian B., Lockhart, Texas

DEAR JULIAN: The multi-Emmy-nominated actress -- who starred in such films as "Poltergeist," "The Big Chill" and such telepics as 'Adam" and "Baby M" -- co-stars with Jessica Lange and Tammy Blanchard in CBS's upcoming remake of "Sybil," playing the abusive mother of the young woman who had 16 different personalities. Williams is also currently on the big screen with Meg Ryan, Olympia Dukakis and Adam Brody in the indie film "In the Land of Women." And in recent years, she's done a steady stream of guest star roles on such series as "24," "Criminal Minds," "Numb3rs," "Las Vegas" and "Strong Medicine."

 

ALL MY CHILDREN: Tad unleashes his anger on the Masons, who had no idea what they were getting into when they set out to adopt Jenny. J.R., Babe and Colby intervene when they fear Krystal really will shoot Adam. Tad takes drastic action and handcuffs himself to Adam, certain that Janet will contact him eventually. Tad and J.R. dismiss Adam's claim that he's suffering a heart attack. Jamie realizes that Adam really is having a heart attack. Jonathan's good mood over Alexander's shooting unnerves Annie. Jonathan realizes Annie suspects him of shooting Alexander, but he assures his brother he didn't commit the crime. Ryan and Jonathan are optimistic about escaping their violent past. Josh boldly approaches Hannah, and the two give in to their urges and have sex. Hannah breathes a sigh of relief when she tosses the rifle she used to shoot Alexander into the water, but she turns around and sees that Zach has been watching her. Zach tells Hannah he will not turn her in for shooting his father. Zach cautions Lily not to let Ava take advantage of her.

SNEAK PEEK: Kendall catches Greenlee.

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AS THE WORLD TURNS: Paul reveals to Meg that the plan is to scare Craig into confessing his part in Rosanna's death. Meg argues that unless they all work together, Craig will go free. Paul and Lucinda offer Alison money for a few vocal recordings. Meg cautiously leads Craig to believe they have a future, and he invites her out for a drink. He is thrown when he gets a call from "Rosanna." Rosanna's doctor tells Craig that she's disappeared. Alison, as faux Rosanna, tells Craig, "I know you tried to kill me, Craig," and Paul shatters a vase in the background. Craig discovers that a photo of Rosanna has been smashed and realizes that Rosanna has been in the house. Katie tries to clear the air with Jack, but he says goodbye. Casey wants to know why Maddie isn't happy about her college acceptance letter. Maddie tells him she wants to stay in Oakdale so she'll be there when Casey gets out of prison.

SNEAK PEEK: Paul tricks Craig.

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BOLD AND BEAUTIFUL: Nick and Taylor exchange vows and are pronounced husband and wife. They inform their guests they have to leave for their in vitro appointment. Taylor "helps" Nick when he doesn't get inspiration from DVDs and men's magazines. Ridge tries to feign surprise as Lt. Baker tells him that Shane's body washed up on the Venice Beach. Lt. Baker learns that the Shady Marlin left the harbor two nights ago and has his forensic team search the boat for anything that could be tied to Shane. Ridge tells Stephanie he has to turn himself in. Stephanie is interested when she learns that Nick can be tied to Shane and that he made a scene in front of Lt. Baker. Nick tells Taylor he's a suspect, but there's nothing that can tie him to Shane. A lab technician informs Lt. Baker that five hairs found on the Shady Marlin match Shane's. Stephanie tells Ridge not to confess because Nick will pay for the crime. Bridget informs Eric that she's moved on from Nick and wishes Brooke would do the same.

SNEAK PEEK: Ridge takes on Nick.

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DAYS OF OUR LIVES: Sami is horrified to come face-to-face with a soot-covered E.J. in the ladies' restroom. She races out of the bathroom into Lucas' arms and faints. Lucas rushes her to the hospital. E.J. shows up at Sami's hospital room, takes out a syringe and injects something into Sami's IV tube, saying it will kill her in two minutes. E.J. leaves, and when the two minutes are up, Sami is still alive. E.J. meets up with Celeste at the hotel -- where it's revealed they've been working together the entire time. Kate overhears that E.J. and Celeste are in cahoots. Philip shows up in Tinda Lau. The sheriff arrives and tells Philip there's nothing he can do, since there is no extradition treaty between Tinda Lau and the states. Duck catches Shawn and Belle trying to escape and threatens them at gunpoint. Philip enters and says they can leave -- without Claire. Belle moves out with Claire, and as Shawn turns to leave, Duck shoots him. Kayla decides Steve's sister Adrienne can free him from the sanitarium. Chelsea tells Abby that she broke up with Nick.

SNEAK PEEK: Wedding bell blues.

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GENERAL HOSPITAL: Carly is head over heels in love with her husband, as they look forward to spending the rest of their lives together. Amelia accepts Sonny's offer to join him for a drink when she shows up at his door by accident. Amelia has Wes call Sam and pretend to be Todd Sullivan, one of the men she scammed. Tracy returns from her business trip to find Alan's ghost still hasn't left the mansion. Luke tells Tracy that the guardianship hearing for Laura is drawing near. Tracy warns her son that Luke can never learn the truth about Rick Webber's death. Craig decides to punish Nikolas by letting him die and plans on leaving town for parts unknown. Nikolas tells a horrified Emily that he only has hours left to live. Skye meets with Ric and makes it clear she'll do whatever it takes to take Alcazar down. Alcazar is wise to Skye's betrayal. As a storm pounds Port Charles, Jason finds Elizabeth collapsed and bleeding on the floor. He races her to the hospital.

SNEAK PEEK: Elizabeth fights for her life.

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GUIDING LIGHT: Mallet visits with Blake, and in her comatose state, he confesses to his dark past to her. Mallet thanks Blake and opens her eyes. Matt goes to Vanessa, asking her not to throw away what they have. Mallet is relieved when Blake says she didn't hear what he was talking to her about. Blake suggests that she stay with Dinah and Mallet. Natalia says that all her memories of Gus were good -- until he disappeared. Gus says leaving her was the hardest thing he's ever had to do. Judge Green rules that a truant Daisy will spend at least two months in juvenile detention. Josh apologizes to Reva and says he's still in love with Cassie. Reva admits to Cassie that she's still in love with Josh. Cassie asks Reva if she's trying to take Josh back, and she admits that she told Josh she loved him and wanted him back, but he went home to her. Ashlee is sentenced to three years in juvenile detention and probation, thanks to Josh's kind words and Jeffrey's hard work.

SNEAK PEEK: Daisy pushes her parents together.

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ONE LIFE TO LIVE: Nash waits for Jessica to meet up with him for their midnight rendezvous after she tells Antonio the truth. Jessica struggles to share her feelings for Nash with Antonio. Unable to reach Todd, Blair is frantic. She cleverly determines the address where he may have gone and heads there. Blair finds a pool of blood when she arrives at the tenement, but she gets little help from the police. Blair later gets proof that Todd was in the room earlier. Miles lets Marty know that he went on a date but doesn't tell her he paid Jordan to sleep with him. Miles darkens when he watches John enter Marty's office. Adriana is taken aback when Tate admits he said what he did on "The View" because he has real feelings for her. Jessica avoids answering Natalie's questions about her feelings for Nash. Bo and Talia receive a letter from the hate group One Pure People warning them to drop their investigation. Michael and Marcie celebrate their first anniversary.

SNEAK PEEK: The hate crimes continue.

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PASSIONS: After a heart-to-heart about forgiveness, Sam and Eve decide to go find Ivy and Julian in order to rekindle their respective romances. Ivy and Julian discuss their failed marriage and recent relationship disasters over a bottle of brandy. The conversation ends with them in bed together. Eve and Sam walk in on the duo. Luis rejects Sheridan. Upon learning that Miguel and Luis might be freed if Theresa gives in to the blackmailer's demands, Pilar tells Ethan to stay the hell away from her daughter. Jessica's friendly gathering with Simone and Paloma is interrupted by Spike, who is determined to sell Jessica's baby. He threatens to dig up the dead Johns Jessica slept with and see if their DNA matches the baby's. Julian shows up at Tabitha's unannounced, and asks to take Endora to her first day of preschool. Though he says he wants to be the best father he can be, Tabitha explodes. She doesn't want Endora to be a Crane. Eve gets an urgent call from Julian, who has news about their son. Tabitha frantically searches for Tina, a preschool classmate Endora turned into a cat.

SNEAK PEEK: Eve and Julian think they have found their son.

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YOUNG AND RESTLESS: At Newman Enterprises, Nikki is in the midst of discussing her campaign plans with Victoria when they see an old clip of Nikki on TV from her days as a stripper at the Bayou. David proudly shows Jack and Sharon the old footage of Nikki stripping that he leaked to the press. Jack fires David, who warns him that he will regret his decision on election night. Nikki hires David as her campaign manager. Phyllis recites her vows, promising to not only love and honor Nick, but to do the same for everyone in the room. After the ceremony, Detective Maggie Sullivan arrests Phyllis. It is obvious Brad turned in Phyllis. Lauren is watching the Jabot security camera feed on the laptop and sees Kevin commend Gloria for dropping her purse in front of William. Gloria says that she can't let William find out that she tainted the Jabot cream. At Newman, Michael and Victor confront Ji Min, saying that they know that Jack is Ji Min's boss, and pressure him to help them bring Jack down.

SNEAK PEEK: Lauren confronts Gloria.

 

DEAR STACY: I was watching the movie "Deuces Wild," which came out in 2002 with Stephen Dorff. I would like to know who sang the song "To Be Loved" in the scene where a guy is looking through the window at a girl who is disrobing. The song really caught my attention since the '50s was my time. Can you also let me know where I can find the song? -- Maria, Inglewood, Calif.

DEAR MARIA: The 1961 "To Be Loved (Forever)" is by the Pentagons, who are also known for their hit "I Wonder" of the same year. It's on the 1994 release "Golden Classics," available at Amazon.com, Walmart.com and elsewhere.

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DEAR STACY: How old is Michael Chiarello of The Food Network's "Easy Entertaining"? What's his background in food preparation? Every once in a while he has his daughter on the show, but I've never seen his wife. Is he divorced or what? -- A.B., New York

DEAR A.B.: The 45-year-old celebrity chef hails from Red Bluff in Central California, the son of parents who emigrated from Calabria, Italy. He is a graduate of New York's Culinary Institute of America and holds a bachelor's degree in hospitality management from Florida International University. The cookbook author and Emmy-winning TV host has served as executive chef of numerous restaurants, including San Francisco's Caffe Museo and the Ajax Tavern in Aspen, in addition to his own famous Tra Vigne in California's Napa Valley. Now out of the restaurant business, he owns Napa's Chiarello Family Vineyards and winery. The father of three daughters from his first marriage (Margaux, 23, Giana, 15, and Felicia, 9), he wed present wife Eileen in 2004, and they welcomed son Aiden last year.

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DEAR STACY: The actress who plays the housekeeper on "Two and a Half Men" -- please tell something about her. I'm sure I've seen her before. She is very good. -- Danielle A., Cleveland

DEAR DANIELLE: That's character actress Conchata Ferrell, who's been a staple of TV, film and theater for more than three decades, with credits including such films as "Network," "Edward Scissorhands" and "Erin Brockovich," and television shows including "L.A. Law," on which she played Susan Bloom. The 64-year-old Obie and Drama Desk-winning actress hails from Charleston, W. Va., is married and has a daughter.

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DEAR STACY: Whatever happened to Robert Lansing, who starred in "Twelve o'clock High"? He was a handsome cuss in his day! -- Jamie C., Austin, Texas

DEAR JAMIE: The actor, whose final role was that of Paul Blaisdell in the series "Kung Fu: the Legend Continues" in 1993-1994, died of lung cancer at age 66 in 1994. He's remembered by fans of the original "Star Trek" series as secret agent Gary Seven, by viewers of the vintage western series "Branded" as Gen. George Custer, and by "Twilight Zone" aficionados for playing the astronaut who falls for Mariette Hartley's character before being placed in suspended animation for a 40-year voyage in "The Long Morrow."

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DEAR STACY: Is the actor who plays Agrippa on "Rome" related to the actor who plays Patrick on "Men in Trees"? -- Jenny A., Brooklyn, N.Y.

DEAR JENNY: No. Irish actor Allen Leech of "Rome" is not related to Derek Richardson of "Men in Trees," who hails from Queensbury, N.Y.

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DEAR STACY: What happened to Judge Mablean, who was the "Divorce Court" judge for years? My girlfriend said she was too outspoken and was fired. Did she get tired of the show? Or was she really fired? -- Jennie R., Brooklyn

DEAR JENNIE: Judge Mablean Ephriam was let go from the show by Fox last year after a bitter salary dispute. She issued a statement at the time saying that the last straw, to her, was the network's interference with her hairstyle. I can tell you that some of the people she worked with were not sorry to see her go. She was replaced by Judge Lynn Toler.

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DEAR STACY: I am a fan of Ben Stiller, and I am also an avid "Trekker." A few years ago, Stiller hosted a "Star Trek" anniversary special on TV. Would absolutely love to see it again. Any chance of the show being repeated? -- Sarah B., Bayside, N.Y.

DEAR SARAH: You're referring to the 1996 UPN special "Star Trek: 30 Years & Beyond." Although it's possible that it could be repeated sometime, your best bet is to get a hold of a copy. The special was released on VHS and can be found on eBay and Amazon.com.

 

ALL MY CHILDREN: Zoe and Bianca aren't sure what their relationship will be like, but they agree that they want to explore something together. Bianca gives Zoe her first estrogen shot. Colby is hurt by her father's heartlessness and tells him she's going to live with Krystal and the baby. Krystal informs Tad she is glad he fathered her baby. Ava and Lily are intrigued by one another and decide to form a relationship as sisters. Zach and Alexander's other victims are sickened when the judge rules that the old man be remanded to the state psychiatric hospital. Alexander is gunned down on his way to the psychiatric hospital but is still breathing. Hannah disassembles a high-powered rifle and throws it into the water. Zach and Ryan are dismayed by Kendall and Annie's growing friendship. Josh is genuine when he tells Krystal that he's moving on and setting Babe free. J.R. surprises Krystal and Babe with his heartfelt gesture and supports Colby living with them. Julia is saddened and worried when negotiations fail and the nurses go out on strike. Adam plans on using the nurses' strike to his advantage.

SNEAK PEEK: Jenny is kidnapped.

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AS THE WORLD TURNS: Paul continues to bait Craig, saying if Craig gives up WorldWide, he'll lead him to Johnny. Craig takes satisfaction in the rift he sees between Paul and Meg. Paul and Meg make love. Meg tells Paul they can't be together while they're trying to set up Craig. Lily informs Lucinda she knows how to get WorldWide back from Craig, but Lucinda doesn't want to hear it. After Lucinda tells her off, Lily buys more diet pills. Holden finds Faith's stash of laxatives and confronts her. Holden also discovers Lily's diet pills. Lucinda is loving and supportive when she learns Lily has decided to enter rehab. Alison tries to score some meth, but Paul inadvertently interrupts. Jade arrives at Al's in time to see Gwen almost spot Cleo. Jade blasts Cleo, but Cleo surprises her by doing a great Gwen imitation. Casey tells Maddie he asked Tom to speed up his sentencing, and they begin to make love. Casey must serve time in jail.

SNEAK PEEK: Casey says goodbye.

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BOLD AND BEAUTIFUL: Taylor is disappointed to find out the pregnancy test results were negative. She uses this information as an excuse to give Nick a way out of their relationship, but instead he wants to set a wedding date. Brooke is happy to learn that Taylor is not pregnant. Ridge and Ashley make dinner plans, much to Brooke's surprise. Brooke tells Ashley not to rush into anything with Ridge. Stephanie is happy to see that Ridge and Ashley will be spending time together. Ashley says that she is looking forward to being with Ridge. Stephanie helps Ridge with an important business matter. Nick takes the Shady Marlin out and remembers the time he spent with Brooke, Hope and R.J. on the boat. Nick then surprises Brooke by showing up at her doorstep.

SNEAK PEEK: A deadly deed.

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DAYS OF OUR LIVES: Shawn tells Gabby she's welcome to travel with Belle, Claire and him to Australia. Shawn makes it clear that when they arrive, she's on her own. Duck tells Shawn the last time Gabby left the island she became pregnant. Maggie informs Max he can no longer see Abby. Celeste informs Sami how they will get rid of E.J. Celeste will drive her to the cabin, she'll have the poison lipstick, and she's already hidden a can of gasoline. They'll burn down the cabin with E.J. inside. E.J. tells Lucas and Kate he's leaving town for a couple of weeks to get married. He says he's in love with a woman who wasn't available until now, and he's taking her to Vegas and then on a honeymoon. He tells Kate the woman's name is Brandy Mathas. He spells it carefully so Kate can Google her. Kate realizes Brandy Mathas is an anagram for Samantha Brady. Stephanie returns to Salem, where Kayla fills her in on the specifics about Steve's condition. Stephanie tells Abby about her new boyfriend: He's got a criminal record and has taught her to live on the wild side.

SNEAK PEEK: E.J. warns Sami.

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GENERAL HOSPITAL: Carly is relieved to see that Sonny will be OK and breaks the news of her engagement to him. Sonny reluctantly agrees to sign the divorce papers. Jax wants to get married sooner rather than later. Jason learns that Elizabeth will carry the baby to term. Elizabeth is wracked with guilt about depriving Jason of his child and admits she loves him. Alan realizes that Tracy really loves Luke and agrees to leave her alone for the night. Sonny warns Amelia to stop the media frenzy surrounding Sam that's affecting his family. Amelia gets more dirt on Sam from a private investigator. Luke is floored to learn Laura named Nikolas as her guardian. A hidden Mr. Craig listens as Luke tangles with Nikolas over Laura. Mr. Craig wants Nikolas to sign away guardianship of Laura, but he refuses. Ric anticipates Sonny and Jason's demise when they retaliate against Alcazar. Coop is given the go-ahead to join the police force. Logan brazenly asks Sonny for a job in his organization as payback for helping save his life. Luke and Tracy get drunk and come to appreciate their unique relationship.

SNEAK PEEK: Sam shoots to kill.

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GUIDING LIGHT: Frank gets word of a large withdrawal from Springfield National. Cyrus enters the warehouse as Marina comes on the scene. Marina trains a gun on Cyrus. Frank arrives, distracting Marina. Marina is shot. Frank realizes that he's the one who shot Marina. Matt confesses to Vanessa that Finch isn't a banker -- he's a loan shark. Vanessa feels betrayed and tells Matt she can no longer be with him. Beth agrees to marry Alan. Rick tells Alan that Beth's baby is his. Josh is horrified when he learns he's going to be placed in solitary for a month. Josh asks Reva to make this last visit count. Josh kisses her passionately, and they begin to make love. Coop asks Ashlee if she shot Alan. After Daisy confesses to Gus that she's in love with him, he replies he loves her like a daughter. When Gus isn't looking, she puts sleeping pills in his drink. Daisy lights a candle, setting a romantic mood, and crawls into Gus' arms, as the candle starts a fire. Dylan tells Harley he's in town for good, and she breaks the news that she sent Daisy away.

SNEAK PEEK: Cassie confronts Reva.

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ONE LIFE TO LIVE: Marty and Cole renew their bond as mother and son, as they prepare to celebrate Patrick's posthumous birthday. Asa wants Nora and Bo to reunite. Antonio rips into Jessica for hurting Jamie by bailing on the adoption. Jamie lets Jessica know she saw Jessica and Nash kiss. Todd and Blair break into the adoption agency. Rex cleverly comes up with a way to stop Todd and Blair in their tracks by reporting a burglary in progress. The cops burst in on Todd and Blair as they're looking through a file pertaining to adoptions in Llanview. The manager refuses to give Todd access to the records, but he says he will drop the charges if Todd and Blair get out of Chicago immediately. Rex is greatly relieved when Todd reluctantly agrees to leave town. Bo holds a press conference in an effort to flush out the arsonist and enlists some of the victims to participate. Adriana is stunned when Tate, while on "The View," announces to Joy Behar and Elisabeth Hasselbeck that she is the love of his life

SNEAK PEEK: Todd's life is on the line.

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PASSIONS: The verdict is in -- Luis and Miguel are found guilty. Luis is sentenced to death by lethal injection. Chris tells Sheridan he is leaving town with James. Tabitha is pleased that Endora will not be able to attend preschool. Tabitha begins to feel bad when she realizes that Endora wants to play with other children. Chad listens as Whitney advises Valerie that any man who cheats is a dog. Chad tries to stop Valerie from confronting Vincent, but she is determined to have it out with him. When Chad hears screaming coming from within Valerie's house, he charges in and finds Valerie has been beaten by Vincent. Chad convinces Valerie that calling the police about Vincent beating her up would be bad for Crane Industries and she could lose her job. Chad encounters Vincent sneaking around outside of Valerie's house. Chad demands Vincent leave everyone he cares about alone. He can't resist temptation, however, and Chad and Vincent kiss. When she gets a call from Jarred, Theresa stops making love to Ethan, determined never to do it again.

SNEAK PEEK: Sheridan seeks revenge.

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YOUNG AND RESTLESS: Ji Min and Jill are both embarrassed that they let themselves get carried away sexually, unaware that Kevin spiked their drinks. Ji Min says that he has had feelings for Jill for a while, but he is ashamed that he acted on them before even taking her out for dinner. Aware of Ji Min and Jill's night of lust, William tells Jill he no longer wants to see her. William informs Gloria that he has new evidence in the Jabot lotion-tampering case. Kay tells Jack that she will accept his offer to have the Chancellor Industries construction team build Clear Springs. Lily confronts Daniel about finding the strangersbynight porn site on his computer. Nick discovers that someone posted the cliff photos online for anyone to view. He goes to the computer and is shocked by what he finds. He calls Phyllis and says that it appears that Sharon was responsible for Dru's death. Lily confronts Neil about his drinking, and he promises to stop immediately. Adrian tells Colleen that he has received a job offer in Paris. Colleen tells him that she wants to come with him. J.T. informs Victoria that Sharon and Brad have been lovers. Jack asks Sharon to elope with him.

SNEAK PEEK: Victoria and J.T. make love.

 

MALIBU, Calif. (UPI) -- Actor John C. McGinley, who plays Dr. Perry Cox on NBC's "Scrubs," married his girlfriend of nearly three years this weekend in Malibu, Calif.

The 47-year-old actor had proposed to yoga teacher Nichole Kessler last August after dating for two-and-a-half years, and People magazine said that on Saturday the happy couple married in a small ceremony at their Malibu home.

Accompanying the 34-year-old bride down the aisle was McGinley's son Max, 9, who was instrumental in the couple first meeting.

The actor had earlier told People that his son, who is from an earlier marriage, took the initiative with Kessler when the father-son duo was out walking McGinley's dogs on the beach.

"Max went over to this hot blonde behind me and I was just aghast," McGinley has said. "I was like, 'Max, you get the dogs. I'll talk to the hot blondes.' And so we switched."


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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British network is sorry for showing porn

LONDON (UPI) -- Smallworld, which supplies cable TV in Britain, has apologized for accidentally airing porn instead of regular programs.

Viewers in Scotland and England got quite a surprise when what they expected to be the "Ten O'Clock News" or the BBC's "Jeremy Paxman and Newsnight," turned out to be adult channel Climax 3, The Guardian reported.

The cable company accidentally aired Climax 3, part of the Playboy subscription channels, for an entire two hours until the mix-up was discovered and fixed, the report said.

"We are in the process of upgrading our systems in preparation for our re-launch later this month and have come up against several problems. When the free-to-view time came to an end at 10 p.m., some unsuitable content was broadcast," said a spokesman for Smallworld, which was formerly called WightCable.

The Smallworld Web site claims that the network will be the only supplier of television, phone and Internet services over a purely digital network in West Scotland and Northern Britain.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Old photos show Paul McCartney in glasses

LONDON (UPI) -- Beatles fans knew John Lennon as the one who wore glasses, but Paul McCartney also had his own pair of specs and wore them behind the scenes in London.

A rare picture of McCartney from 1967 shows him wearing the glasses while he and his band mates were having a discussion about their classic album "Sgt Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band," The Mail on Sunday reported.

The photograph, previously unpublished, is from a set taken by photographer Frank Herrmann, as The Beatles worked at Abbey Road studios in North London.

The 40 photos were taken on March 30, 1967, and were featured in an exclusive spread in The Mail on Sunday's Live magazine

Friends say McCartney rarely wore glasses because it was such a big part of John's image.

"He was always conscious that John was famous for his glasses," said one friend. "He felt that it was important to maintain their image and John's glasses were part of that."


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Rescued dog makes Broadway debut

NEW YORK (UPI) -- An 8-pound Chihuahua named Chico, who was rescued from a New Jersey humane society, is about to make his New York stage debut in "Legally Blonde."

The underdog himself is playing Bruiser in the musical version of the story of sorority girl turned Harvard graduate, Elle Woods, played by Laura Bell Bundy, The New York Post reported.

The little dog is introduced in the first scene of the show when Elle's Delta Nu sisters are looking for her. When they can't find her, they consult the one source left: her dog.

They ask Bruiser questions, and he barks a response to each one like a canine oracle.

Chico's real life story has its own elements of drama as well. Veteran Broadway animal trainer William Berloni adopted him even though he was a timid shy dog who may have been abused.

In fact, Berloni finds and adopts all his performing pets from animal shelters, and he said Chico is "one of the best dogs I've ever trained."

"Legally Blonde" begins preview performances Tuesday.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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The Hollywood Exclusive

By Marilyn Beck and Stacy Jenel Smith

Kelly Ripa: Regis' Return Not a Moment Too Soon/'Brady Bunch's' Marcia, Maureen Mccormick, Pens Book

Kelly Ripa tells us Regis Philbin's planned return to "Live With Regis & Kelly" Thursday (4/26) isn't coming a moment too soon as far as she is concerned.

"Without Regis, it's a lot of work. He really holds down the majority of the responsibility, so when he's not there, I find myself watching the time cues, and doing all the stuff that I usually don't have to worry about," she notes. "For me, the show is like a party. I just show up in my cocktail dress."

Philbin has been recovering after undergoing triple coronary-bypass surgery.

When asked if the 75-year-old TV icon might see this as a time to start thinking about retirement, Ripa responds, "I hope not. I don't want to speak for him, but he loves to work. To me, this whole thing has probably been torturous for him to have to stay home from work."

Ripa has certainly stayed busy, having recently hosted the TV Land Awards, which air Sunday (4/22). "I kept saying at dress rehearsal, 'I feel so calm.' I thought I'd be really nervous. Then Danny Bonaduce said to me, 'You know when you're going to be nervous is when you fly out here for real, you look out in the audience and you see the faces of all the people you grew up watching.' Sure enough, I saw the cast of 'The Brady Bunch,' 'Roots,' 'Hee Haw,' and 'Taxi,' and I couldn't believe what I was looking at. I was unbelievably starstruck the whole time," says Ripa, whose grand finale is a musical reenactment with the cast of "The Brady Bunch."

"I don't mind telling you, we'll give the 'American Idol' contestants a run for their money."

AND: Maureen McCormick tells us she has started penning her autobiography -- which already has a big wanna-see factor attached to it, given her place in the "Brady Bunch" TV firmament, her talk of such behind-the-scenes matters as the crush she used to have on cast mate Eve Plumb, and her recent disclosures about how she overcame cocaine addiction and bulimia. McCormick, who's also being seen on VH1's "Celebrity Fit Club," says her husband of 22 years, Michael Cummings, and their 16-year-old daughter, Natalie, have been 100 percent supportive of her decision to talk about how she came back from her ordeal of drug addiction and eating disorder problems. They all feel her story has a greater purpose.

"I really think that's what we're here for -- to share experiences that can help others," she told us at the 8K 5K Walk/Run on behalf of Northridge Hospital's Children's Assault Treatment Services (C.A.T.S.) unit. Maureen appeared onstage to give the runners and walkers a pep talk before the starting whistle blew.

As far as "Celebrity Fit Club," she says with a laugh, "My daughter made me do it."''

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LOST IN TRANSLATION: "Notes from the Underbelly" novelist Risa Green says diehard fans of the best seller have let her know they are not pleased with the watered-down heroine in ABC's new series adaptation of the book. "A few people said, 'Oh, I thought she would be meaner,'" says Green of the main character played by Jennifer Westfeldt in the show. In the tome, the heroine is a seriously reluctant mother-to-be, and she explains, "Some people liked the edgy, honest bitchiness of her in the book, but it's easier to do in a book and make somebody likeable because you have 300-400 pages to explain where they're coming from. On TV, if they're not likeable right away, it's not a good thing, so she had to be softened a little bit."

Green adds, however, "The general consensus is the tone of the show is pretty similar to the book. The biggest difference is that the show is narrated by the husband, whereas in the book it's narrated by the main character who's going through the pregnancy. One of the reasons for changing that was hopefully to get men interested in watching the show." The novelist -- whose second tome, "Tales from the Crib," was also optioned by "Notes" producers Barry Sonnenfeld and Kim and Eric Tannenbaum ("Two and a Half Men") -- says she has no typical writer's Hollywood nightmare tales to tell. "I'm lucky. The Tannenbaums were great. They kept me really in the loop, and I was able to sit down with (series creator) Stacy Traub and really talk to her. Overall it was a much better experience than I thought it would be."

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CLASS ACT: With a mid-May production start set in Shreveport, La., final castings are being done on "The Great Debaters" -- with the much-desired role of Denzel Washington character's wife yet to be filled. She's to be attractive and bright, natch, and supportive of his mission to coach his debate team to victory -- that is, his all African-American debate team, circa 1935, in the saga inspired by the real-life story of Melvin B. Tonson. Tolson was a professor at Wiley College, Texas, whose team became so successful they were able to challenge Harvard in the national debating championship. Oprah Winfrey is among the producers on the feature, which boasts a script worked on by Horton Foote, among others.

 

NEW YORK (UPI) -- The Rev. Al Sharpton says his security has been beefed up after receiving death threats for his role in shock jock Don Imus' firing from CBS in New York.

"We have received several threats that we consider serious," he said. "I have been stabbed once, so we don't take anything too lightly."

Charlie King of Sharpton's National Action Network said one example was someone called to say he was going to "hunt him down and shoot him like an animal," the New York Daily News reported Sunday. King said he contacted the mayor.

New York Police Commissioner Raymond Kelly confirmed that officers had been assigned "in the vicinity of his church and with his staff."

The threat increase is Sharpton's leading the fight against Imus after the talk show host called the Rutgers women's basketball team "nappy-headed ho's."


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Kate Middleton plagued by media

LONDON (UPI) -- Since Kate Middleton and London's Prince William announced their split Saturday, the media has constantly been trying to get at Middleton to hear her story.

The media organizations reportedly are trying to get one of the most sought kiss-and-tell stories in the history of the royal family, Britain's Observer reported Sunday.

The end of the royal romance was revealed Saturday by the Sun newspaper and by mid-morning Middleton's lawyers had to warn media that she and her parents must be left alone, and that "any further intrusions into their privacy" will be "viewed as harassment."

Middleton and Prince William had been together for four years before amicably splitting.

The separation has been blamed partly on William's increasing commitment to his military career.

It was also reported that Prince Charles wanted William to reach a 'make or break' decision about marrying Middleton because he felt the media obsession around their possible engagement was not fair to her


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Moore to debut new 'Sicko' film

NEW YORK (UPI) -- Filmmaker Michael Moore is drawing flak for taking rescue workers from the Sept. 11 World Trade Center attacks to Cuba to be treated for their ailments.

The trip is detailed in Moore's latest documentary, "Sicko," a critique of the U.S. healthcare system that Moore wants to debut at the Cannes Film Festival next month.

February's trip to Cuba was to show the U.S. healthcare system pales in comparison with Fidel Castro's socialized medicine, the New York Post reported Sunday.

The film targets the medical care provided to people who worked on the toxic World Trade Center debris pile. But some of those approached to go on the trip claim Moore used them for his own advantage.

"He's using people that are in a bad situation and that's wrong, that's morally wrong," said Jeff Endean, from Morris County, N.J., who spent a month at Ground Zero and suffers from respiratory problems.

Moore's publicist did not return calls.

Cuba has made recent advancements in biotechnology and now exports its cancer treatments to 40 countries, the Post said.

The United States restricts travel to Cuba, but Moore was granted access for "journalistic endeavors."


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Record group seeks piracy settlements

WASHINGTON (UPI) -- Students at 22 U.S. colleges and universities have a chance to settle with record labels before being sued for big bucks for illegally downloading music.

The Recording Industry Association of America recently sent 413 pre-litigation settlement letters to the schools in the Washington-based organization's latest round of informing administrators about pending infringement suits against students or school personnel and asking the schools to forward that letter to those accused, RIAA said in a news release. Under this new approach, the people named can settle the record company claims against them before a lawsuit is filed.

Since the initiative began in February, several schools sponsored forums to discuss illegal downloading and its consequences, RIAA officials said.

"We hope that fans on campuses and administrators recognize the extraordinary legal marketplace for music online now," said Steven Marks, RIAA's general counsel and executive vice president.

Besides opening themselves to lawsuits, Marks said offenders also open their computers to viruses and spyware.

Surveys indicate that at least half of college students download music and movies illegally, Marks said. In a study by national researcher NPD, students said more than two-thirds of the music they acquired was illegally obtaine


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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The Hollywood Exclusive

By Marilyn Beck and Stacy Jenel Smith

Selleck: 'Vegas' Reports 'Premature' (But Don't Bet Against 'Em)/'Bachelor' Host Feels Show Making up for Lost Luster

Reports that Tom Selleck is to be the new marquee name of NBC's "Las Vegas" series now that James Caan is leaving are "way premature," according to Selleck -- but don't be surprised if they come to pass.

"It's not at all a done deal. I had just come from the first meeting where they said they'd like me to do it -- I'm happy to say -- when the Hollywood Reporter called my agent and said, 'Tom's going to do 'Las Vegas."' But we hadn't negotiated, hadn't even talked about what to do with the character."

But they're negotiating now. Fast. "They're planning shooting to start the 30th of April, so we're day to day," he says.

One of Selleck's key concerns is that he wants to continue to make Jesse Stone movies -- as in his hugely popular latest signature character, the booze-bedeviled chief of police of a small Massachusetts town, from the best-selling mystery books by Robert B. Parker. The latest, "Jesse Stone: Sea Change," premieres on CBS May 20.

Also: "I'd like to see my family," says Tom. "'Las Vegas' is an ensemble, so the schedule is attractive. They wanted Jesse Stone to become a weekly hour drama, and I said, 'You know, my daughter is in high school. Ask me in a couple years.' That's why I quit doing 'Magnum,'" he adds of his 1980-1988 "Magnum, P.I." series. "We never got cancelled. I stopped doing it because I wanted to have a family, that was very important to me, and I knew I'd never see them if I kept up the schedule of starring in an hour-long show."

If all goes as is hoped, he'll play the new owner of "Las Vegas'" Montecito Resort & Casino. "I think he's a rancher and a bit of a mystery, which I like, who's equally at home in jeans or a tuxedo. I've heard 'debonair,' but I don't know how debonair he is. I'm always looking for the flaws in a character. That's what I fought for on 'Magnum,' that he wouldn't be perfect, wouldn't have a girl on each arm. I was influenced a lot by James Garner, whose Jim Rockford character was an ex-con. But I don't know what we're going to do," as far as "Las Vegas," Selleck adds. "We're talking. I think that people like the idea."

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THE VIDEOLAND VIEW: "The Bachelor" host Chris Harrison tells us he wasn't too happy with the show's last season in Rome, but he feels the new Bachelor, Lt. Andy Baldwin, is regaining the show its lost luster.

"It's definitely better than the last three years' worth. We just kind of got in a rut. We took a dip with Lorenzo [Borghese]. It was a mistake. For me, it was a disappointing season all around. I didn't think he was a great Bachelor at all," says Harrison of the Italian "prince." "In season eight, we had Travis, who was this great doctor, and then they thought, 'We've got to be different. Let's get this prince.' We've made up for that with Andy, though, who is this ridiculously good-looking doctor."

However, even with a great Bachelor in place, Harrison admits the behind-the-scenes team has little control over how the show turns out in the end. "It's a matter of luck with casting, coming up with a good guy, and also after a great season, it also comes down to free will. 'Is he going to decide to propose at the end?' If he doesn't, I think it kind of leaves everyone empty," he points out. "At the end of this, we have an amazing proposal, and he's such a genuine, good guy that it really paid off. People in the control room were crying or cheering. That's when we know we've got a good show because TV people are the most jaded, skeptical people in the world."

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PET PARADE: "Scrubs" star Judy Reyes, who grew up in New York, tells us she can't get over how many Hollywood celebrities are infatuated with their dogs. "I'm in love with my dog, but I'm not obsessed with my dog," she insists. "My dog actually treats me like crap. My dog will sleep with me, but if I try to hold him, he gets off the bed. I'm like, 'I'm sorry. Come back!'"

Lea Thompson, who tells us she has four horses, 100 fish, a parrot, and three dogs at her home, is clearly an animal lover, but she admits she never got used to working with one on camera. "I did 'Caroline in the City' with the same cat for four years. Who has a cat in front of a live audience? The worst thing about it was that it was only trained to just stay. You'd pick it up and it didn't know what to do."

 

NEW FOREST, England (UPI) -- Al Gore's Oscar-winning global warming film, "An Inconvenient Truth," certainly hasn't been banned in Boston, but it is being panned in Britain.

A group of parents in New Forest said the government's decision to send the former U.S. vice president's documentary to every secondary school in the nation is nothing more than political indoctrination, The Independent reported Tuesday.

"The film goes well beyond the consensus view and is not therefore suitable material to present to children who need to be given clear and balanced, factually accurate information," said Derek Tipp, a spokesman for the parents who are considering legal action under the 2002 Education Act.

British Education Secretary Alan Johnson has said he wants teachers to use the award-winning documentary to prompt students into discussing climate change and global warming.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Poll: Jay Mohr best in Larry Birkhead role

BURBANK, Calif. (UPI) -- Comic Jay Mohr would be the best fit for Larry Birkhead in a movie on Anna Nicole Smith's life, a poll by Burbank, Calif.-based AccessHollywood.com showed.

Nearly 1,700 viewers logged on to the syndicated show's Web site during the weekend to vote on whom they thought should play Birkhead, the late Smith's one-time lover and father of her 7-month-old daughter, Access Hollywood said in a news release.

According to the poll, 59 percent of the participants thought Mohr was best for the role while 28 percent said they thought actor Owen Wilson could do the job. Nine percent selected former 'NSync singer Lance Bass and 5 percent picked "Malcolm in the Middle" alum Frankie Muniz.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Underwood claims three CMT awards

NASHVILLE (UPI) -- Carrie Underwood's vengeful-woman-done-wrong "Before He Cheats" won the three awards in the 2007 CMT Music Awards presentation in Nashville.

Other winners in the fan-determined competition included Kenny Chesney, Jack Ingram, Rascal Flatts and Sugarland.

"Before He Cheats" won honors for female video and video of the year, as well as video director of the year for Roman White, CMT said Tuesday in a news release. Underwood was presented awards in all three categories.

Underwood, an "American Idol" winner, said, "I started out on a fan-based show and you guys have continued to support me throughout everything."

Taylor Swift's video for "Tim McGraw" was named breakthrough video of the year. The 17-year-old thanked the people in the audience, as well as the "MySpace people and everyone who voted."

Chesney won the male video award for "You Save Me." Rascal Flatts' "What Hurts the Most" won in the group video category and Sugarland's "Want To" won in the duo video division.

Jack Ingram's "Love You" won the Wide Open Country video award for pushing the genre's boundaries.

Comedian Jeff Foxworthy emceed Monday's event on the campus of Nashville's Belmont University.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Death lurks in final 'Potter' installment

NEW YORK (UPI) -- Prognosticating what happens in the finale of British writer J.K. Rowling's "Harry Potter" series is nearly as enjoyable as reading the books themselves.

Between now and the book's July 21 debut, Scholastic, the U.S. publisher of "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows," is fueling people's imaginations by distributing bookmarks that ask questions about the novel. The first week's talking point, also an online posting, is: "Who Will Live? Who Will Die?"

"Who dies is the No. 1 thing on people's minds," said Emerson Spartz, founder of mugglenet.com, one of the more popular Potter fan Web sites with about 20 million hits a month.

The question is so pressing that at least three books have been written about the final Rowling effort. Spartz and his colleagues penned "What Will Happen in Harry Potter 7: Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Falls in Love and How Will the Adventure Finally End?" Then there is "The End of Harry Potter? An Unauthorized Guide to the Mysteries That Remain," by David Langford and "The Unauthorized Harry Potter: Everything You Wanted to Know About the Harry Potter Series" by Adam-Troy Castro.

So far, there's no word whether "Deathly Hallows" includes a Potter's grave.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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The Hollywood Exclusive

By Marilyn Beck and Stacy Jenel Smith

Carlos Mencia Weighs in on the Imus Affair, Prepares for Flak/McRaney and Burke -- Fairytale Renewal of Marriage Vows

Now it's Comedy Central's "It" Bad Boy comic, Carlos Mencia, leaping into the Don Imus media firestorm. He tells this column that he's taping a bit in response this week that will soon find its way onto his show. It certainly won't calm anyone down.

"We're going to address it in a way that I don't know any minority would. What it boils down to is this: If a black man or black woman had said those comments, it wouldn't be an issue. Why is that? Is that fair? Is that equal?" he asks, referring to Imus' firing in the wake of complaints over his insulting reference to the Rutgers women's basketball team. "I feel like as a responsible American, I should point out that I think that's hypocritical and that's (bull) -- When rappers do all this stuff it's OK. When Mencia does it, it's OK. When Chappelle and Chris Rock do it, it's OK because that's different. That's (bull)!"

Mencia, who actually has taken his own critical hits for the way he throws racially charged verbiage around, makes it clear, "For me, it's pretty basic. I'm saying a) I want to preserve my right to say what I want to say, and b) as long as your intent is to be funny and to be good, if you're not a racist at heart, I don't care. And if you are a racist at heart, you'll get yours. But when somebody attempting to be funny gets in trouble like that, and we all know the hypocrisy in it, that's not cool at all. That's just us flexing our societal muscle. To be quite honest, I think it's even worse than when white people displayed racism back in the day because that came from true ignorance."

Mencia acknowledges, "I know that I'm going to get in trouble with my community for this. I know some people are going to be like, 'You're a sellout,' and all this stuff. But, you know what? If we keep doing this to white people, inevitably one day the white community is going to get pissed off and tell us we can't do white jokes, and I rue that day. Don't tell me what I can or can't talk about."

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ISN'T IT ROMANTIC: Gerald McRaney and Delta Burke celebrated the recent 20th anniversary of the day they met with a renewal of vows ceremony and party the "Jericho" star tells us was "absolutely like a fairy tale."

He notes that his wife planned the event, attended by some 40 family members and friends. It took place at a rented house at water's edge on the Gulf of Mexico, Sanibel Island, off Ft. Myers, Fla. "She had a 90-ft. blue runner that went down the beach -- the whole theme was blue to go with the ocean -- white chairs for the guests, a wrought iron archway done with a tulle material and seashells. We wrote vows for each other. She had a 25-30-foot-long dinner table, maybe even longer, covered in white linen with beautiful china and silverware and 70 candles, and decorated with painted driftwood, lights and little shells. People sat down to a seven-course meal under a tent, but the tent was clear so you could see the palms, the moon, the clouds and stars. The dance floor was surrounded by strings of lights in real seashells. It was magic."

McRaney says that although some folks turned out for a look, they kept a respectful distance. "There is an old Florida feeling there, and the people couldn't be nicer."

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GIRLS OF FUTURE PAST: Preproduction is underway on the August-debuting "Flash Gordon" series for the Sci Fi Channel (Peter Hume of "Charmed" and Robert Halmi Sr. and Jr. executive produce), with a 22-episode commitment in place and actor Eric Johnson (Whitney Fordman in "Smallville") set to star. Now they're interviewing actresses to play Flash's leading lady, Dale Arden -- a TV reporter with a Yale education and small-town spirit. Vancouver is standing in for outer space, and a Canadian actress is wanted for the role.

With the big-screen "Speed Racer," starring Emile Hirsch and Christina Ricci revving up for a June production start in Berlin, casting forces on the feature have been on the lookout for a child actress to play the young Trixie, Christina's character. Producer Joel Silver has made it clear that the adaptation of the popular 1960s Japanese anime series will be a big, G-rated family film. It's being directed by brothers Larry and Andy Wachowski of "The Matrix" blockbuster movie fame.

 

ALL MY CHILDREN: The battle at the Chandler mansion escalates when Adam brings Josh home as a replacement for J.R. Tad learns his house is on fire. Adam cruelly blackmails Amanda, claiming he will frame Janet for attempted murder unless Amanda helps him destroy Tad and Jamie. Amanda is reunited with Janet, who Adam is keeping very comfortable in a cozy, secret attic room at the mansion. Tad finds and traps Adam. Janet helps Adam escape. Babe sticks to her decision to divorce J.R., saying that although she loves him, she can't keep repeating the same mistakes. Ryan gets a mysterious phone call. A sympathetic Bianca tries to make Zoe's mother see that her child is still the same gentle, loving person on the inside that she's always been. Zoe wants to be loved and accepted by Betty, so he tells her that he's decided to live his life as Freddy again. Betty stops Zoe from cutting off her hair and insists he explain everything to her. Bianca is hit with the realization that she's falling in love with her friend. Aidan is baffled when he encounters a young streetwalker named Ava who looks remarkably like Lily.

SNEAK PEEK: Colby is Krystal's midwife.

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AS THE WORLD TURNS: Meg blast Craig for playing everyone, but Craig confesses Meg got under his skin and he tried to be the man he thought she wanted. When he saw her with Paul, he realized his true path. Meg vows to Paul that Craig won't get away with his actions. Faith tells Holden that Lily is still taking pills. Faith collapses, and Lily discovers she hasn't been eating. Emily reveals to Dusty it was Alison in the porn movie. Dusty pretends to be a porn producer and finds her. Dusty and Emily discover a powdered substance in Alison's purse. Jade goes online looking for a double for Gwen. Casey tells Maddie he's been released with an ankle monitor and is under house arrest until he's sentenced. Margo walks in on Maddie and Casey making love. Gwen and Will arrive home to find Barbara lying in wait and demanding to know why Will signed over his trust fund to Iris. After getting Gwen to leave them alone, Will tells Barbara that Maddie tried to kill Adam -- and Gwen helped bury the body. Margo tells Will that Adam called and apologized.

SNEAK PEEK: Gwen has a double.

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BOLD AND BEAUTIFUL: Jackie tells Taylor that she approves of her relationship with Nick. Taylor tells Jackie that she plans to marry Nick, but there is no rush. Nick is surprised that Brooke broke things off with Ridge. She tells him that she wants to get back together with him, but he tells her that things between them are over -- he's in love with Taylor. Taylor tells a stunned Brooke that she almost married Nick and might be pregnant with his child. Phoebe feels guilty that her relationship with Rick could be the reason why Ridge and Brooke broke up. Stephanie informs Brooke that she wants her out of the Forrester business. Rick tells Ashley that he and Phoebe decided to wait until marriage to have sex. Ashley is jealous when she spots Rick and Phoebe kissing. Bridget sees a picture of Ashley and Rick and realizes their relationship was not strictly business.

SNEAK PEEK: Taylor wants another child.

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DAYS OF OUR LIVES: Gabby finally breaks and tells Philip that Shawn and Belle were there, but they left. E.J. learns Sami never had an amnio. Abby is having a great time in New York with Jack, until her dad confronts her about Max. He tells her the reasons why he doesn't want Abby seeing him. Maggie informs Abby she must stop seeing Max. E.J. warns Kayla that if she ever goes anywhere near his father again, he'll kill her. A suspicious Philip gets Willow to admit that someone put her up to robbing the Bradys' home -- E.J. Wells. Abby tells Nick that Chelsea has decided to confess the truth to her father. Nick races off to the police station and informs Chelsea he stole the hairbrush. Chelsea is moved and kisses Nick. She throws the hairbrush in the trash, but when she turns her back, Nick retrieves it and stashes it in his backpack. Abe and Celeste share a tender moment, as he thanks her for helping him get through the last few months.

SNEAK PEEK: Kayla has a car crash.

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GENERAL HOSPITAL: Mr. Craig carries a protesting Alexis up to the house. He enjoys watching Nikolas squirm as he refuses to let Alexis and Kristina spend the night. Craig charms Alexis. Nikolas convinces Robin not to tell Patrick what's really going on. Emily is devastated to find Nikolas and Robin locked in a kiss, thanks to Mr. Craig. Sam is plagued by nightmares of her violent past as "Angela Monroe." Amelia bolsters Sam during her photo shoot and gets more information about Sam's past aliases. Elizabeth feels like a hypocrite for keeping Jason away from his child when she realizes Lucky's job is nearly as dangerous as Jason's. The Quartermaines decide not to go up against Tracy and contest Alan's will if for no other reason than to make sure Skye doesn't get anything. Dillon realizes Tracy thinks she sees Alan's ghost and blackmails her into allowing him to pursue Lulu without any interference from her. Skye and Carly have a vicious catfight. Dillon is crushed when Lulu tells him she doesn't think she'll ever be able to date him.

SNEAK PEEK: Sonny is injured.

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GUIDING LIGHT: Frank is displeased that Marina has hired Cyrus to work at the station. Cyrus tells Dinah to find a way to siphon money from Matt and Vanessa, or he'll ruin Mallet. Dinah pretends to be Vanessa, calls her mother's banker and asks how soon she can get the money. Olivia and Ava bond, as Olivia agrees to help Ava with Spaulding. Josh's fellow inmates, working for Salerno, pass along a message by punching Josh in the ribs. Alan dreams that Buzz offers to assist him in finding out who pulled the trigger. Buzz helps him rule people out one by one. Buzz points out a long list of people who had it out for Alan. Alan's memory returns, and he remembers his wedding night clearly -- and reveals to Buzz who shot him. Lizzie is thrilled to see Alan awake and immediately asks if he remembers who shot him. Shockingly, he says it's all a blank. Alan is thrilled to find out that Beth is pregnant, and she wishes it were true. Buzz gives Harley the name of a sergeant who will put Daisy through boot camp.

SNEAK PEEK: Ava makes demands of Alan-Michael.

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ONE LIFE TO LIVE: John agrees that he and Natalie should break up, but both want to continue being friends. Out of a desire to protect Cole and stop their families from fighting, Starr announces that she will end all contact with Cole. Cole and Starr are heartbroken as they say their final goodbye. Bo, Antonio and Talia bring Nora and Evangeline up to speed about the arsons, explaining they are most likely being caused by a hate group whose motto is "one pure people." Bo tells Antonio and Talia to keep the hate crime angle out of the media. Clint and Dorian have a heart-to-heart talk, which ends with a passionate kiss. Viki is smitten when she meets Douglas Kline, a newly hired doctor at the hospital. Miles claims to Todd that Spencer left him information about the whereabouts of Todd's son. Cristian is impressed with Blair's ability to take care of herself. Nash challenges Jessica to admit she wants to be with him as much as he wants to be with her. Jessica angrily signs the adoption papers in front of Nash to prove she's committed to her husband.

SNEAK PEEK: Viki meets a new man.

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PASSIONS: Ethan arrives at the hospital too late to stop Theresa from marrying Jared. Ethan still wants Theresa, despite her being married to Jared. Theresa and Ethan end up making love while the blackmailer watches. Ethan and Theresa discover the blackmailer's apartment is empty. Fancy fears for Luis' life after finding him unconscious in the burning apartment. Sheridan disguises herself and sneaks in to see Luis in the hospital. Sam suspects Fancy helped Luis escape from prison. Whitney follows Chad to the motel. Chad and Vincent hide in the motel room bathroom as Whitney knocks on the door. Chad fears Whitney will catch him with Vincent and leave him. Tabitha concocts a potion to recapture happiness. Tabitha offers Whitney advice about Vincent. Paloma sees the half-man, half-woman in the funhouse mirror. Fox demands Judge Reilly move up Miguel's trial.

SNEAK PEEK: Luis' trial begins.

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YOUNG AND RESTLESS: Brad tells Colleen she will have to find a way to pay for school if she plans to continue dating Korbel. Jack meets with Colleen and agrees to loan her money so that she can finish the semester, and she promises to pay his loan back later. Charges of kidnapping against Kay are dropped. Lily turns on Daniel's computer and is stunned to see a porn site pop up. During a photo, Phyllis and Sharon begin to fight by the side of the cliff. Phyllis threatens to call Jack and tell him about Brad and Sharon's affair. Sharon loses her footing and falls over the cliff. Dru tries to grab her, but also falls over the cliff. Sharon is rushed to the hospital with extreme hypothermia, meaning that her body's mechanisms have shut down to protect her. The doctor later says that she has regained consciousness, but that they still shouldn't get their hopes up.

SNEAK PEEK: Neil is back on the booze.

 

LONDON (UPI) -- A "mural" by Pablo Picasso, the result of art, science and wine in a London apartment, will be the emblem of a facility honoring art, science and life.

Now the so-called Bernal's Picasso, an improvised angelic pair later chiseled from the wall, has been acquired by the Wellcome Trust for its new gallery in Euston area of London, the Times of London said Monday. The Trust bought it for $495,000.

Picasso improvised the mural for science professor John Desmond Bernal at the scientist's London apartment one night in 1950.

Trust officials said Bernal's Picasso is a fitting symbol for the Wellcome Collection, a $59.3 million venue that examines linkages of medicine, life and art.

"It is a rather wonderful emblem of an extraordinary moment in the history of art and science when these two great figures and quite a lot of red wine came together," Ken Arnold, head of public programs for the Wellcome Trust, said.

Bernal, who died in 1971, was an Irish physicist who worked on X-ray crystallography and took the first X-rays of hydrated protein crystals


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Publisher touts man, 96, for writing debut

BRICK, N.J. (UPI) -- The author of "The Invisible Wall," a memoir about growing up Jewish and poor in a British mill town, is described by his publisher as a late bloomer; he's 96.

Although Harry Bernstein wrote short stories that were published and a novel he said sold at least one copy, he didn't begin writing "The Invisible Wall" until after his wife died in 2002, USA Today said. The title refers to the divide between Christians and Jews in Stockport, near Manchester -- Christians lived on one side of the streets and Jews on the other.

Despite Bernstein's earlier novel, Random House touts "The Invisible Wall" as a debut by a 96-year-old author during its U.S. release March 19.

"It makes for good publicity," said Bernstein, who lives in a Brick, N.J., retirement community.

He began his memoir after Ruby, his wife of 67 years, died.

"I had this gap to fill. Writing was sort of therapy," he told USA Today.

Bernstein is putting the finishing touches on a sequel and is in contract negotiations.

"I don't blame them for making sure I finish it," he said. If they give me an option today, I could be gone tomorrow."


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Bahaman court orders Stern to pay $10K

NASSAU, Bahamas (UPI) -- A Bahaman court ordered Howard K. Stern, Anna Nicole Smith's companion, to pay $10,000 in fees in his appeal to block DNA testing on Smith's daughter.

Stern was ordered to pay $5,000 in fees to the Registrar General, who is responsible for public records in the Bahamas, and $5,000 to Larry Birkhead's Bahaman lawyer, TMZ.com said Monday.

Stern had appealed to halt the DNA testing on 6-month-old Dannielynn after a sample was taken from the child and shipped to the United States for analysis.

The court's ruling and the abandoned appeal could allow for the unsealing of the DNA test results, which could happen in court this week.

Meanwhile, Birkhead's former attorney, Debra Opri, who represented him in custody and paternity related matters in Florida and California, sent the California photographer a bill totaling more than $620,000 in fees.

In a statement published on TMZ.com, Opri said the fees she billed were "reasonable, necessary, and appropriate, given the complexity and magnitude of this very high profile case that was litigated in two different states and a foreign country."


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Maytag Repairman too busy to be Mr. Lonely

BENTON HARBOR, Mich. (UPI) -- A guy from Richmond, Va., won't face the problem Jesse White, Gordon Jump and Hardy Rawls did: What to do to while away the hours as the Maytag Repairman.

Clay Jackson was selected the new Maytag Repairman from a nationwide search, Benton Harbor, Mich.-based Whirlpool Corp., Maytag's parent company, said in a news release. Jackson will play a major role in revitalizing the 100-year-old appliance brand of quality and dependability.

Jackson, a professional actor before selling real estate, said the chance "to combine my love of acting with being a spokesman for the Maytag brand was something I couldn't ignore."

He was selected from more than 1,500 audition participants.

Besides becoming the fourth Maytag Repairman in 40 years, Jackson will sport a new uniform and attitude -- and a full-time schedule of appearances and media promotion beginning in May, the company said.

"The new Maytag Repairman will help revitalize the Maytag brand and its heritage by keeping one foot in our past while putting the other in our future," said Jeff Davidoff, Maytag vice president, brand marketing and communications.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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The Hollywood Exclusive

By Marilyn Beck and Stacy Jenel Smith

Jon Cryer and Lisa Joyner Plan June Wedding/Joe Mantegna Pulls Eclectic String of Roles

"Two and a Half Men's" Jon Cryer has big plans for this year's hiatus, but they don't involve work. "I'm going to get married!" reports the actor, who's been the man in the life of beautiful TV reporter Lisa Joyner for close to two years now.

He reveals they'll tie the knot in Mexico in June. "It'll be a small ceremony ... There'll be fireworks. I'm excited about it. I'm going to be busy," he notes happily.

Cryer, who just directed the "Two and a Half Men" episode that will air April 30, first noticed Joyner standing in front of her house -- which was a block away from his -- chatting with her gardener. He left her a note asking her to call him. She did, and, obviously, it went very well.

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TOGETHER AGAIN: Joe Mantegna and Mary Steenburgen reunite in the indie film "Elvis and Anabelle," but don't expect anything like the married couple they played on "Joan of Arcadia" for two years. In fact, says Joe, don't expect anything like anything he's ever done before.

"I play a Texas undertaker who is a hunchback. It's a complete departure for me," notes the actor. "It was just a wonderful script. It's a very bizarre movie about two young people from different worlds who collide ... almost a modern-day 'Edward Scissorhands' meets 'Romeo and Juliet.'"

The star-crossed lovers and title characters are played by Max Minghella and Blake Lively, and Keith Carradine also costars in the feature, which was unveiled at the recent South by Southwest Festival.

Mantegna's pulled a particularly eclectic string of assignments lately -- even for the Tony-winning actor known to "The Simpsons" fans as mob boss Fat Tony (yes, he does the voice in the July release "The Simpsons Movie.") He'll be seen on the small screen with Debra Messing, Judy Davis and Miranda Otto in the USA Network six-hour miniseries "The Starter Wife," debuting May 31. He also has the feature "Childless" with Barbara Hershey, Diane Venora and James Naughton upcoming.

"That's another interesting, different kind of movie," he says of the film about a group of people gathered for a teenager's funeral. "We're almost doing it all in monologues to the camera, and I thought, 'All these actors are either going to be boring and it'll be a disaster, or it's going to work well.'" He adds, "I just saw a screening of it, and wow, did it work."

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THE TIMES THEY ARE A'CHANGIN: Former "Barbershop" actor Sunkrish Bala says the fact that his interracial marriage on ABC's new mid-season sitcom "Notes from the Underbelly" is played as completely incidental could be a sign of welcome change in Hollywood. "I don't think they knew the character was going to be Indian until they cast me, and my wife (played by Melanie Paxson) is as blue-blooded American as they come," says Bala, who plays half of an eager young couple expecting their first child in the series based on Risa Greene's best-selling novel of the same name. "The interracial thing is addressed as far as they don't pretend I'm just another white guy, but it's not central to our relationship, which is really great. When you're an actor of color, especially if you're not black or Hispanic or something they're used to, it's a rare thing that you don't have to play ethnicity as a big deal. It is such a shift."

Bala says he and his sitcom wife, Paxson, were thrown right into each other's arms with no chance to bond in the April 12-debuting sitcom about pregnancy and parenthood from director/producer Barry Sonnenfeld and "Two and a Half Men" producers Kim and Eric Tannenbaum. "It was a real fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants situation because I was the last one cast for the pilot," he says. "I literally got cast on a Friday, we all met for a table read that afternoon, and we were shooting the next Monday."

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THE INSIDE TRACK: Grammy-winning singer/songwriter Darlene Koldenhoven says she went way out on a limb for her new CD, "Infinite Voice." "I feel like I'm taking a big chance with the album," says the four-time Grammy nominee known worldwide as the unforgettable vocal soloist in the PBS special "Yanni, Live at the Acropolis." "There are lyrics, but most of the album is done with vocalize, where I use my voice as an instrument and it's a mixture of classical, world music, New Age and smooth jazz."

The classically trained artist says she laid down the musical tracks for the album, but after that "a lot of it was just very inspired. I open myself to God and the universe, and I'm the conduit and allow it to flow through. When I was in the studio, every day was a different energy. There were a lot of spontaneous musical happenings and wonderful moments." She adds, "It was my intention to create an album that was healing. I just want to make people aware of this infinite voice of love that permeates through their lives. I'm hoping audiences and critics will love what they hear and be open to this new way of doing music. Nowadays it just seems like so many artists are marketing packages. Where is the soul of the true artist who stays home doing their craft as opposed to making the scene and being crazy? I'm just constantly trying to get at the heart of the artist in me." Koldenhoven needn't worry. Her "Infinite Voice" is already receiving high critical acclaim.

 

 


Lynda Hirsch on Soaps

 

ALL MY CHILDREN: J.R. reaches out to Babe and gives her a piece of land. He tells Babe that if they stay together, they can build a house for both of them to live in -- but if they divorce, she can build a house for her and Little Adam. Krystal frees Tad when she finds him bound to a bed. Adam is dismayed when he wakes up sprawled naked on the table in the boardroom of Chandler Enterprises. Adam is dragged away to the sanitarium for psychiatric observation and comes face to face with Janet. Adam returns to Chandler Enterprises as J.R. is staging a coup against him. J.R. emerges victorious when the board sides with him and votes Adam out of the company. Amanda learns that her mother has escaped. Zach meets Hannah, Ethan's mother. He gives Hannah a job. Jeff is stunned when Erica makes it clear that she is in love with Jack and always will be. Jack and Barbara make love. Lily tells Barbara to leave Jack alone.

SNEAK PEEK: Adam blackmails Amanda.

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AS THE WORLD TURNS: Meg reminds Paul that she's not ready to commit to a future with him, but Paul's happy to stay in the present. Craig reveals that Lily has inadvertently sold the company to him. Craig says that unless Lucinda tells him where Johnny is, she can kiss her company goodbye. Lily takes a pill, as Lucinda charges in looking for answers. She tries to hide the pill bottle from her mother, but spills them -- and Lucinda discovers the reason Lily's been acting so strangely. Lily tries to defend herself. Adam enters the cabin and startles Gwen. He traps her and reveals that he was the one haunting her. Gwen kicks and screams as Adam kisses her. Jade enters and tries to pull Adam off. He knocks her out and starts to rape Gwen. Will arrives and tells Adam to get his hands off Gwen, while Gwen keeps Will from killing Adam. Gwen is still upset by the near rape and feels guilt over what she did to Adam. Jack warns Katie not to get involved with Brad. Katie denies she's falling for Brad's charms and compliments Jack.

SNEAK PEEK: Lily is out of control.

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BOLD AND BEAUTIFUL: Ridge tells Rick that Phoebe will be watched for the whole trip. Phoebe defiantly informs Ridge that she and Rick will be together. Rick and Phoebe tell each other that Ridge won't keep them separated because they love each other. Ridge and Brooke realize that Phoebe and Rick are missing, and Ridge finds out that someone booked the honeymoon suite under his name -- he believes it was Rick. An out-of-control Ridge hits Rick, but he immediately regrets it. Brooke tells Ridge that she can't be his wife. Brooke returns Ridge's engagement ring. Brooke knows her future is not with Ridge, and she wants Nick back if he will have her. While Jackie and Taylor are in the kitchen, Brooke enters Nick's house and heads upstairs to Nick's bedroom. Brooke asks Nick to make love to her -- and he looks like he might not resist Brooke's request.

SNEAK PEEK: Taylor thinks she is pregnant.

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DAYS OF OUR LIVES: Hope says she does not believe Chelsea set the house on fire. Hope breaks into Willow's room at the YWCA and finds the stolen jewelry. Chelsea sees Nick at the lab and asks him to steal the incriminating hairbrush so the police can't get any DNA off it. Nick refuses, telling her it is unethical and he could lose his job. Duck warns Belle that Gabby is going to steal Shawn. Back in the state hospital, Steve faces off with a brutal orderly named Foley. Max and Kayla head to Italy to find evidence that John's kidney was taken to give to Stefano. Max and Kayla find Stefano. Kayla goes into the room and takes photos of the surgical scar on Stefano's side and gets his fingerprints. As Sami is filling out the faked DNA report on her baby, Celeste warns her it won't work -- she has to kill E.J. Sami calls E.J. He comes over, and they "open" the report, which says Lucas is the baby's father. E.J. knows it's a fake, but he pretends to be devastated.

SNEAK PEEK: Jack is back.

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GENERAL HOSPITAL: Jax pushes Carly's buttons when he allows her to believe that he and Alexis just slept together. Carly is livid when she learns the truth about Jax and Alexis. Jason notes the similarities between his situation and what he did to his late brother. Elizabeth feels guilty when she sees the tenderness Jason offers to Cameron. Mr. Craig wants Robin and Nikolas to pretend they have fallen in love. Sam's newfound notoriety follows her as she returns to work at the Metro Court. Amelia digs into Sam's past. Lulu tells Dillon, Milo and Spinelli that she will date all three of them, or none of them at all. Maxie has a surefire way for Coop to pass the entrance exam for the police academy. Sonny anticipates that Coop will prove very useful once he joins the police force. Alcazar struggles to keep his temper in check and his ruse alive when Sonny taunts him about being a coward who's hiding behind Skye. Alcazar meets with an associate as he plans Sonny and Jason's demise.

SNEAK PEEK: Sam is haunted by her past.

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GUIDING LIGHT: Beth takes the stand and reveals to everyone that Alan-Michael was at Towers that night -- on his own two feet. Alan-Michael tries to defend himself, but Olivia brings in a videotape of him walking in and out of the hospital. Ava is horrified and runs out of the room. Alan-Michael chases her down, and she tells him she's moving out tomorrow. Irate over losing Ava, Alan-Michael asks for dirt on Olivia, Jeffrey and Buzz. Josh is found guilty of shooting Alan and given a 15 to 25 year sentence. Cassie asks Rick about using L-dopa to jolt Alan out of his coma. The nurse confirms that Beth isn't pregnant, but she continues to lie in front of Rick -- and he offers to be a father to Beth's "baby" once more. Daisy video blogs about Gus and how Harley may not deserve him. Harley and Daisy get into a heated argument when Daisy spouts that Harley would have just "screwed up" Sydney. Without thinking, Harley slaps Daisy. Mallet and Dinah marry.

SNEAK PEEK: Josh heads to jail.

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ONE LIFE TO LIVE: John finds himself in a no-win situation when Natalie accepts the marriage proposal he never actually made. John confesses to Natalie that he wasn't going to propose to her. When Todd learns Blair slept with Cristian, he tells her that she is dead to him. Blair believes she finally got her wish of having Todd out of her life, even if she really didn't want it to come true. Evangeline informs Todd she cares for him -- and they kiss. After Miles kisses her, Marty slaps him. Miles sees himself as his former disfigured self and feels no woman will ever love him. Starr tells Cole they need to run away. Starr explains they won't be able to stay away forever -- just long enough to get even with their parents and get what they want: to be together. Chaos erupts when Todd finds Cole and Starr at the bus station, and John and Marty soon join them. John stops Todd from strangling Cole. With Evangeline's help, Talia and Antonio get a major break in their arson investigation.

SNEAK PEEK: Todd searches for his son.

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PASSIONS: At Rae's funeral, Simone insists Luis killed her girlfriend. Simone learns from a friend of Rae's that she left a mysterious envelope to be delivered to Simone in the event of her death. Luis arrives at the bartender's apartment in search of Rae's envelope. He breaks in, only to find the place is on fire. Simone realizes the bartender is dead and that the killer set a fire to cover it up. When Luis tries to shoot open a window, Fancy and Sam believe the arsonist is shooting at them. They open fire on Luis. Paloma and Sam try to convince Jessica to leave Spike, but she insists he loves her. When Eve refuses to let the wedding proceeded because of Jared's failing health, she gets a threatening message from the blackmailer: either she lets Theresa and Jared get married, or she'll never see her long-lost son. Tabitha holds a terrified Spike captive in her basement of horrors.

SNEAK PEEK: Ethan wants Theresa.

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YOUNG AND RESTLESS: John's ghost appears to Jack. John reveals that he is confused about why Jack proposed to Sharon. When John asks Jack if he loves Sharon as much as he loved Phyllis, he hesitantly answers yes. Nikki and Victoria share with Katherine how disappointed they are with their husbands' recent behavior, and Kay states that they should do something about it. Katherine suggests that Nikki run for state Senate against Jack and offers to give the maximum contribution to her campaign if she does. Nikki happily agrees. Victor warns Nikki that if she plans to run against Jack, she should be prepared to be brought down in the crossfire of his plans to destroy him. Adrian arrives at Jack's house and pulls Colleen into a passionate kiss. Colleen reveals to Sharon that she pretended she had broken up with Adrian so that he would not be at risk of losing his job at the university. Sharon advises her to stop seeing Adrian, but she knows she's an adult and agrees not to tell Jack.

SNEAK PEEK: Jill wants Kay in jail.

 

"Meet the Robinsons" (G, 1 hr., 32 min.)

Imagination, marching to a different drummer, creating your own family if you don't inherit one, and hope for the future fuel this handsome, time-traveling, computer-animated fable from Disney about a brilliant orphan inventor. There are a few dry patches and grown-ups may find the movie too crammed with characters and visual details. But supple-brained kids 6 and older will have no problem. At some theaters the film will be shown in 3-D and for once that technology doesn't darken the screen. It pops out, but not scarily. And the design is gorgeous: The future that spikey-haired, bespectacled, 12-year-old Lewis visits shows people riding in bubbles, but the main look is retro -- rainbowy art deco, with a dash of Fritz Lang's silent 1927 classic "Metropolis" for darker moments that warn of a dehumanized future run by robotic bowler hats.

Parents should note that "Meet the Robinsons" opens with a baby abandoned on an orphanage doorstep and depicts older kids seeing their chances of adoption fade. Lewis becomes obsessed with finding his real mom. The film deals -- humorously, but with underlying seriousness -- with issues of loneliness, failure, and childhood sadness haunting us into adulthood. The villain, pointy-headed "Bowler Hat Guy," wears a bowler that spouts metallic claws and chases folks. Lewis and Wilbur Robinson, a kid from the future, crash Wilbur's time machine. There are rude expressions such as "puke-face" and "booger-breath." A dinosaur-shaped topiary comes to life and chases everyone, too. Oh, and frogs sing jazz.

Loosely based on the book "A Day with Wilbur Robinson" by William Joyce, "Meet the Robinsons" hinges on Lewis' desire to find his mom and how he invents a "memory scanner." Wilbur appears at the school science fair and seems to know Lewis. He brings Lewis to the future to meet the riotously eccentric Robinson clan. Lewis finds affection there, but eventually realizes he must live his own life in his own time.

"Blades of Glory" (PG-13, 1 hr., 33 min.)

Is "Blades of Glory" a work of cinematic art? Naaaaah. Is it shamefully funny? Yeahhhh -- also tasteless and crude. Will it make high-schoolers laugh? More than likely, but it is far too lewd to recommend for middle-schoolers. Yet how can one not chortle at mushy-muscled Will Ferrell in sparkly Spandex as a dumb, sex-obsessed figure skating champ named Chazz Michael Michaels and dorky Jon Heder ("Napoleon Dynamite," PG, 2004) as his naive, slightly less stupid rival, Jimmy MacElroy, and the idea of the two teamed as the first male-male skating duo? Imagine the lifts, the lutzes, the crotch jokes! There are endless, R-ish verbal and visual sex jokes (just beyond innuendo) about macho Chazz's supposed "sex addiction." (He attends a lascivious sex-addicts' support group; he says he had an affair with a 35-year-old woman when he was 9.) And there is much homophobic humor -- a bit in which Ferrell holds Heder upside-down in a skating move as he gazes grimly across his crotch is typical. Ferrell wears a towel dangerously low in one scene. Characters drink and talk of being high on drugs. The movie spoofs adoption and includes a subtle incest joke, a death threat, a bizarre and bloody video of an ice stunt ending in an accidental decapitation, midrange profanity and toilet humor.

Chazz and Jimmy, who hate each other, ruin their solo careers by scuffling publicly and are banned for life. Three years later, Chazz is a drunk skating in a cheesy ice show and Jimmy sells skates. Then a fan/stalker (Nick Swardson) of Jimmy's and a veteran coach (Craig T. Nelson) both realize the two were not banned from couples skating. A brother-sister duo (Will Arnett and Amy Poehler) are bent on sabotaging their comeback and using their nicer sister Katie (Jenna Fischer) as bait.

P.S. FOR TEENS: It's actually quite difficult for movies to get to the heart of how (and why) athletes or artists do what they do. Many efforts come off as corny or romanticized. "Blades of Glory" makes fun of the world of competitive figure skating, but also gets at some truths about that insular world. If you want to see a really good movie about the same kind of artistic/athletic intensity, but shown in a serious but contemporary way, check out "The Company" (PG-13, 2003), about a young woman with a professional ballet company.

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Beyond the Ratings Game: Movie Reviews for various ages

-- 6 AND OLDER:

"Meet the Robinsons" G (NEW) (Gorgeous computer-animated feature (shown in crisp, colorful, non-scary 3-D at some theaters) celebrates imagination, individuality, creating a family when you don't have one, in tale of 12-year-old orphan inventor Lewis; his determination to find his real mom leads him to invent a "memory scanner" and brings Wilbur Robinson, a boy from the future, to his science fair; Wilbur brings Lewis to the future to meet the hilariously eccentric Robinson clan and see a world inspired by art deco and, at darker moments, the dehumanized future of Fritz Lang's 1927 classic, "Metropolis." Baby abandoned on orphanage step; sad older kids see adoption chances fade; issues of loneliness, failure, childhood sadness following us into adulthood handled humorously, but with underlying seriousness; "Bowler Hat Guy" villain wears a robotic bowler that spouts metal legs, chases folks; Lewis and Wilbur crash Wilbur's time machine; rude phrases "puke-face" and "booger-breath"; dinosaur topiary comes to life, chases folks.)

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-- 8 AND OLDER:

"TMNT" PG (First "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle" feature since 1993 (there were three, in 1990, '91 and '93, all PGs), this time a computer-animated 'toon -- dimly lit as well as narratively murky, hard-edged, too violent for some under 10; the four Ninja Turtles (mutated long ago by a polluted "ooze" and named for Italian Renaissance artists Leonardo, Michelangelo, Raphael and Donatello) have become estranged; their sensei, Master Splinter, says they must reconcile before facing a new threat -- reanimated stone warriors from ancient Central America, related to an artifact the Turtles' archeologist pal April (voice of Sarah Michelle Gellar) has delivered to a museum director (Patrick Stewart). Semi-harsh language ("snot kicked out of him"); tired ethnic stereotypes; off-color joke kids won't get refers subtly to phone-sex industry; red-eyed monsters loom huge, as do the ancient warriors; battles not bloody, but big and loud.)

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-- 10 AND OLDER:

"The Last Mimzy" PG (Kids into science, idea of time travel will like film's cool premise, despite its messy, disjointed execution: a 10-year-old (Chris O'Neil) and his little sister (Rhiannon Leigh Wryn) find a box on the beach, full of spinning, humming rocks and crystals, plus a stuffed bunny that "talks" to the little girl about saving a doomed world; soon their parents (Timothy Hutton, Joely Richardson) and even Homeland Security are concerned. Too intense for some under 10: adult characters voice 9/11 paranoia; little girl gets hysterical when her mother throws out the magical "toys"; later the girl is nearly sucked into a space/time vortex; kids levitate themselves, things; they say things "suck" and hamburgers are "chopped-up cow"; two-headed snake; roaches; federal agents drag family off for questioning; teacher lives with his girlfriend; talk of reincarnation.)

"Pride" PG (Terrence Howard is charismatic in uplifting, if overly teary-eyed drama about real-life swim coach Jim Ellis and how he began coaching inner-city Philadelphia teens to swim competitively in the early 1970s, helping to turn their lives around despite poverty, racism; Bernie Mac as burned-out rec center maintenance man inspired by Ellis; Tom Arnold as a bigoted rival coach. Realistic theme about evils of racism; occasional racial slurs; high level of profanity for a PG film -- much use of the S-word; crude verbal joke about a broken condom; fistfight; rude hand gesture; local thug makes threats; women who appear to be prostitutes.)

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-- PG-13s:

"Blades of Glory" (NEW) (Riotous, rude farce about figure skating rivals Chazz (Will Ferrell) and Jimmy (Jon Heder), banned forever from competition for public scuffling; three years later, a stalker/fan (Nick Swardson) and a veteran coach (Craig T. Nelson) note a loophole that would allow them to compete as the first male/male duo. Constant R-ish verbal and visual sex jokes go beyond innuendo: crotch gags; references to Chazz's "sex addiction" (he attends a lascivious support group, claims he had an affair with a 35-year-old woman when he was 9); much homophobic humor; a towel worn dangerously low; drinking; talk of drug use; spoof of adoption; subtle incest joke; death threat; video of ice stunt ending in bloody accidental decapitation; profanity; toilet humor. Not for middle-schoolers.)

"Premonition" (Sandra Bullock stranded in a dour, derivative, clumsily directed supernatural thriller about a woman who has a time-bending flash-forward to news of her husband's (Julian McMahon) accidental death, then wakes the next day to find him alive; the cycle repeats -- one day he's dead, the next alive; her sanity questioned, she tries to solve the mystery. Upsetting sense of numbing grief, loss; brief glimpse of a severed head; fiery road crash; a bloodied decomposing crow; wounds on a child's face; someone dragged screaming to a psychiatric ward, injected; child has a bad, but not life-threatening, accident; mild sexual innuendo in marital scenes; rare strongish profanity; subtle allusions to infidelity, suicide; smoking; drinking; tranquilizers.)

"Wild Hogs" (Slow to start, but ultimately amusing comedy about four middle-aged Cincinnati guys (Tim Allen, John Travolta, Martin Lawrence, William H. Macy) who trash their cell phones and go on a cross-country motorcycle trip; in New Mexico they face a "real" motorcycle gang (led by Ray Liotta). Too lewd to be a real family comedy; crude language; sexual innuendo -- much of it homophobic; gross toilet humor; considerable midrange profanity; comic fights, mayhem; skinny-dipping scene with a character nude from behind; condom joke; subplot about a gay state trooper (John C. McGinley) who nearly stalks the guys; free-for-all fight; drinking, smoking. OK for high-schoolers.)

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-- R's:

"The Lookout" (NEW) (Young man unhappy with his life turns briefly to crime in an arresting dramatic parable -- often stark, at times sentimental, briefly violent; Chris (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) still has memory and mood problems from head injuries suffered in a car crash (he was the teen driver); he cleans a bank at night, goes to rehab by day, recalls his glory as a teen hockey star; then a thug (Matthew Goode) recruits him to help rob the bank where he works; an epiphany of remembered kindnesses turns Chris back; Jeff Daniels as his blind, hippie roommate. Bloody shootouts; flashback of car crash; sounds of a couple having sex; on-screen kissing; back-view nudity; crude sexual slang, profanity; marijuana; cigarettes; alcohol. 17 and up.)

"Reign Over Me" (NEW) (At last a Hollywood movie dealing with the emotional fallout of 9/11 with a genuine mix of pathos and humor -- writer/director Mike Binder's resonant, painfully funny, imperfect, but moving effort; Alan (Don Cheadle), an upscale dentist, feels a trapped in his perfect life with his perfect wife (Jada Pinkett Smith); he runs into his college roomie, Charlie (Adam Sandler -- adequate, but still doing a variation on his nasal manchild persona), who lost a wife and three children in the 9/11 attacks; Charlie avoids reality, buzzes around on a motorized scooter listening to classic rock on earphones, plays video games, reacts violently when asked about his family; in struggling to help him, Alan finds an outlet, too. Strong profanity; explicit sexual language; strong sexual innuendo; homophobic slur; gun brandished; drinking. 16 and older.)

"Shooter" (Rip-snorter action thriller (based on Washington Post film critic Stephen Hunter's novel, "Point of Impact") moves so supercool fast, audiences won't have time to trip over the logical speed bumps; Mark Wahlberg as an ex-Marine sniper who leaves the military after his superiors betray him on a secret mission; a civilian years later, he's recruited by an ex-colonel (Danny Glover) to stop a presidential assassination; he's betrayed again, framed as an assassin and on the run, aided by Michael Pena as a rookie FBI agent, Kate Mara as widow of his Marine buddy. High-caliber shootings with much blood, occasional gore; gun suicide; fingers, then arm shot off; do-it-yourself bullet removal; villain's implied intention to commit rape; strong profanity; beer. Action fans 16 and up.)

"I Think I Love My Wife" (Chris Rock co-wrote, directed and stars in profane, edgy, moderately sprightly, but superficial comedy, coarsely updating 1972 French film "Chloe in the Afternoon" (R) -- about a family guy considering cheating on his wife (Gina Torres) with a vampy acquaintance (Kerry Washington). F-word oft used in sexual and nonsexual senses; other graphic sexual language; rare sexual situations, steamy, but mostly nonexplicit, except for one sequence about the famous four-hour side effect of Viagra -- no nudity, but graphically implied; racial jokes; rhymes-with-witch word; brief violence; marijuana; drinking; cigarettes; reference to suicide. Film still comes down in favor of family, fidelity, but too raunchy for under-17s.)

"300" (Stunning, digitally enhanced, occasionally giggle-inducing, but mostly epic-feeling (and sounding) adaptation of graphic novel about Sparta's King Leonidas (Gerard Butler) and the Battle of Thermopylae in 480 B.C., when he and 300 men faced Persian emperor Xerxes and his mega-army. Stylized visuals, muted colors make violence seem otherworldly, less gory, but still harrowing -- not for all high-school-age stomachs; spears, daggers through guts, eyes; horses cut down from under warriors; strongly implied rape -- camera cuts away before it becomes graphic; more explicit, but stylized, sexual montage between Leonidas and his Queen (Lena Headey); back-view nudity; toplessness; subtle homoerotic verbal references; mild curses. High-schoolers.)


(c) 2007, Washington Post Writers Group.

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Croc Hunter's daughter launches show

SILVER SPRING, Md. (UPI) -- The legacy of late "Crocodile Hunter" continues with Bindi Irwin, who will launch her wildlife show on the Silver Spring, Md.-based Discovery Kids Channel.

"Bindi: The Jungle Girl," premiering June 9, introduces the audience to critters and wildlife conservation from the cozy confines of a tree house overlooking a rainforest, Discovery Kids Channel said in a news release.

Bindi and Steve Irwin -- who gained fame as television's Crocodile Hunter -- began filming "Bindi: The Jungle Girl" early last year. After her father's sudden death in September, Bindi Irwin, her mother, Terri, and the staff at the Australia Zoo finished filming the series.

The night before her series premieres on Discovery Kids Channel, Animal Planet presents "My Daddy the Croc Hunter," a special in which the daughter shares what it was like growing up with her famous Aussie dad.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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U2's Bono knighted

DUBLIN, Ireland (UPI) -- You can't call him "sir," but Britain's queen made U2's Bono an honorary knight in Ireland Thursday for his humanitarian work and service to music.

British Ambassador David Reddaway made the presentation in Dublin on behalf of Queen Elizabeth, it was reported on the Irish rocker's Web site.

British Prime Minister Tony Blair in a letter described Bono as an inspiration in the fight against global poverty and described himself as a "huge fan" of U2's music.

Bono said it was a "great year for an Irishman to receive an award from Great Britain."

"The peace process has proceeded to a conclusion, debt cancellation -- started in Great Britain -- has put 20 million African children in school, The Happy Mondays and Shaun Ryder have reformed, England's rugby squad entered Croke Park to thunderous applause, silence for 'God Save The Queen,' then the Irish hammered them," Bono said.

Afterward, a proud Bono joked with reporters that "you can call me pretty much anything you want, except sir. You can call me lord of lords or a demi-god." Because he is not a British citizen the award is honorary, without the "sir" attachment, the BBC reported.

Bandmates, family and friends joined Bono for the private ceremony.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Foxy Brown appears before Fla. judge

FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla. (UPI) -- Rapper Foxy Brown finally entered a Broward County, Fla., court to answer charges she battered a beauty supply store employee and resisted arrest.

Brown missed a scheduled arraignment last week, causing Judge Joel Lazarus to issue a warrant for her arrest. Her hearing Wednesday morning was rescheduled for the afternoon because her plane was late, the Miami Herald reported Thursday.

Brown was charged with battery and resisting arrest without violence in a February incident in which she allegedly threw hair glue and spat at the employee, and then later struggled with a police officer, the arrest report said.

In court, Brown's Florida attorney told the judge Brown did not intentionally miss her court date, but that the notice to appear was delivered to the wrong house.

The failure to appear could affect the sentence Brown, real name Inga Marchand, is serving in New York for a 2004 fight in a nail salon. Earlier this month, Brown pleaded guilty to a probation violation for leaving New York state without permission.

During that hearing the judge did not extend Brown's probation, but warned the singer that more infractions could result in jail time.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Akon's 'Don't Matter' tops singles chart

NEW YORK (UPI) -- Akon captured his second No. 1 on the Billboard Hot 100 hit from his album "Konvicted" as "Don't Matter" leapfrogged from No. 3 to No. 1.

Fergie's "Glamorous," fell from No. 1 to No. 2 while "This Is Why I'm Hot," Mims' one-time chart leader, dropped from No. 2 to No. 4.

Gym Class Heroes' "Cupid's Chokehold" featuring Patrick Stump slipped from No. 4 to No. 5. Gwen Stefani's "The Sweet Escape" featuring Akon slid from No. 5 to No. 6.

Avril Lavigne's "Girlfriend" rebounded slightly, moving up to No. 7 from No. 8, followed by Rich Boy's "Throw Some D's" featuring Polow Da Don, which dipped from No. 6 to No. 8.

Justin Timberlake's "What Goes Around ... Comes Around," held on at No. 9, and Chris Daughtry's "It's Not Over," dropped from No. 7 to No. 10.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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The Hollywood Exclusive

By Marilyn Beck and Stacy Jenel Smith

Mo'nique Found Prison Comedy Show Visit Profoundly Affecting/Randy Spelling: Hard To Keep Doing Show after Father's Death

Former "The Parkers" star Mo'Nique went to prison to do a comedy show -- and says she found the experience more profoundly affecting than she could have imagined.

"Don't misunderstand me. Most people who are in prison should be. But some who are there are not bad people. They just got caught in a bad situation," notes the performer, who visited The Ohio Reformatory for Women to do her show -- and to film "I Coulda Been Your Cellmate," which is being released on DVD Tuesday (4/3). She says she was touched to see inmates who had babies in prison, and others who went through a Mother's Day during production "with no visitors -- none."

"When you hear their stories, it allows you to quit being judgmental," adds Mo'Nique, who has a beloved aunt who did time. "You can see that through it all, they could smile. It was incredible. One young lady was in for 145 years. We were able to laugh at that. I said, 'When they told you 145 years, did you say, "Huh?!" Did you say, "Wait a minute"? If the judge said that to me, it would be my last day," declares Mo'Nique. The woman, who had been convicted on multiple counts of murder "told me, 'Please don't have any pity for me. I am supposed to be here, but if by talking to you I can help change it for one other person, I'll do it.'

"As much as I thought I was going in there to do something for those women, they did so much for me," says the comedian.

Mo'Nique has a full agenda. Her VH1 "Charm School" reality show is due to premiere April 15. (It revolves around etiquette training for 13 former "Flavor of Love" contestants.) And she has another "Mo'Nique's F.A.T. Chance" zaftig ladies' pageant coming up later this spring. But she makes clear her trip to do a comedy show in prison won't be her last. "I will definitely do more."

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ON THE PERSONAL SIDE: A&E's Sunday (4/1)-debuting "Sons of Hollywood" is already garnering much media attention, what with an episode in which it's said that Paris Hilton lost her virginity to Randy Spelling. The show might never have been finished, however, if Randy had followed his urge to stop the cameras after the death of his father, Aaron Spelling, last summer.

"When something like that happens, the last thing you want to think about is 'Wow, how is the show going to go on?' but that was a reality -- no pun intended," says Spelling, who co-produced the show in which he stars with Sean Stewart and David Weintraub. "It was always a choice, but being one of the producers and cast members of the show, it was like, 'I have to go on with this. I can't let everyone down.' And in some weird way, maybe someone can resonate with that or learn something from it."

That decision made, Spelling says, "It was such an incredibly hard and stressful summer to have to deal with that and have a camera thrust in your face. Then I also shot a movie while I was doing the reality show as well, so everything combined felt like a lot. I'm really happy I got through it ... it was really a test of strength and faith."

On the one hand, he says doing the show "was somewhat cathartic only because it was a distraction. But what happens with that is you do get distracted, so I really didn't have a chance to grieve. Then you're kind of like thrust into this altered sense of reality because you know this thing just happened, but there's so much other stuff going on. It was tough when everything slowed down and the camera stopped. I remember trying to go away for a few days and relax and get my head straight, and my mind just would not shut off. I didn't know how to relax."

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INSIDE ASIDE: With the third season of the Sci-Fi Channel's Peabody Award-winning "Battlestar Galactica" now a wrap, Mary McDonnell says she's happy just to relax this hiatus. "I love playing President Roslyn," notes the actress. "She's forced me to confront some really very deep things in myself I certainly wouldn't have on my own -- like, 'What would it take for me to make the choice to kill and still be able to go on?' I understand better the complexities of politics and the military ... moment to moment to respond with aggression or respond with openness is a constant choice in life. How do our world leaders go to sleep at night?" How indeed.

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GOING FORMAL: Interesting that both Patrick Dempsey and Katherine Heigl of "Grey's Anatomy" are trading in their scrubs for wedding finery over hiatus. She's due to make the big-screen comedy "27 Dresses," playing a compulsive bridesmaid, beginning May 10 in Rhode Island, while he's lined up for a first-of-May production start on "Made of Honor," the romantic comedy in which he's such a good friend of the bride-to-be (Michelle Monaghan), she asks him to be her maid of honor. Trouble is -- you guessed it -- he's in love with her himself.

 

HOLLYWOOD (UPI) -- A series of initiatives honoring slain Hollywood actress-director Adrienne Shelly has been launched to help give the careers of female filmmakers a boost.

The American Film Institute's Directing Workshop for Women in Los Angeles will begin giving out an Adrienne Shelly Foundation production grant this spring, The Hollywood Reporter said Wednesday. The foundation will underwrite a master class in directing as part of the program.

Shelly was killed at her New York apartment last November.

The Columbia University School of the Arts Film Division is starting an annual award in Shelly's name for best female director -- given to new filmmakers -- while the Women in Film & Television organization in New York also is initiating an annual grant this spring.

This fall, the Maurice Kanbar Institute of Film and Television division of New York University's Tisch School of the Arts will begin an annual ASF scholarship.

No dollar amounts were revealed for the various awards.

Shelly's final directorial effort, "Waitress," was acquired by Fox Searchlight after its January premiere at the Sundance Film Festival. It is scheduled to be released in theaters in May.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Villagers oppose Martha's trademarking bid

KATONAH, N.Y. (UPI) -- Residents of Katonah, N.Y., plan to oppose a bid by domestic diva Martha Stewart to trademark the name for a line of furniture, paint and bedding.

The Katonah Village Improvement Society has authorized funds to challenge plans by Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia to roll out furniture using the "Katonah Collection" brand, Daily Variety reported Wednesday. Stewart is seeking a legally binding registered trademark with the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office.

"This is our town and if Martha Stewart registers it as a trademark there will be no control over the name Katonah," said Bill Tisherman, who heads the civic organization. "The name could be better known as a line of goods rather than a historic place. We're just trying to protect the identity of the town."

During a meeting earlier this year, Stewart's attorney told the organization about Omnimedia's intention to brand Katonah and Bedford, another Westchester County community.

Omnimedia said the town's concerns are "misplaced." Omnimedia attorney John Cuti said Stewart's use of Katonah would not prevent anyone in Katonah from using the name.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Final 'Harry Potter' cover unveiled

NEW YORK (UPI) -- Harry Potter reaching up and He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named peering out are part of the "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows" cover, the New York publisher said.

Two versions of the dust jacket, released Wednesday, will be available in different markets worldwide, Scholastic Inc. said in a news release.

The cover for the United States was designed by Scholastic Vice President and Creative Director David Saylor, who designed all seven Harry Potter covers. The art was created by Mary GrandPre, acclaimed illustrator of the six previous U.S. editions.

For the first time, the U.S. dust jacket is a wraparound.

"On the back cover spidery hands are outstretched toward Harry. Only when the book is opened does one see a powerful image of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, his glowing red eyes peering out from his hood," Saylor said.

Bloomsbury Publishing Plc released the cover images that will appear on editions distributed in Britain, Canada, Australia, New Zealand, South Africa and many other countries throughout the world.

The finale of Harry Potter book series is due in stores July 21.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Modest Mouse's 'Ship' comes in at No. 1

NEW YORK (UPI) -- Modest Mouse claimed its first No. 1 U.S. album on The Billboard 200 as "We Were Dead Before the Ship Even Sank" debuted on top.

Joss Stone's third album, "Introducing Joss Stone," entered the chart at No. 2, also a career best.

Last year's "American Idol" third-place finisher Elliott Yamin's self-titled debut entered The Billboard 200 at No. 3, ahead of another former "Idol" contestant, Chris Daughtry, whose self-titled album remained at No.4 for the second week.

R&B singer Marques Houston's "Veteran" debuts at No. 5 while Akon's "Konvicted" slipped from that spot to No. 6.

Lloyd's "Street Love" fell from No. 2 to No. 7.

After bowing at the top last week, Musiq Soulchild's "Luvanmusiq" plunged to No. 8. Rich Boy's self-titled debut dipped from No. 3 to No 9.

Rounding out the top 10 was Amy Winehouse's "Back to Black," which fell from No. 7 to No. 10.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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The Hollywood Exclusive

By Marilyn Beck and Stacy Jenel Smith

Andrew Dice Clay Aims for 50,000-Plus Crowd in Stadium Event/'Nashville Star' Winner Completes First Album a Week After Show

Andrew Dice Clay declares now that his currently running VH-1 reality show, "Dice Undisputed," has brought him back in the spotlight. "I want to do something bigger than I've ever done!

"I've always called myself the undisputed heavyweight king of comedy because I used to do 20,000 seats a night," says Clay, who is ranked No. 95 on Comedy Central's list of the 100 Greatest Stand-ups of All Time. "Now I want to do something so incredible it'll shake up the comedy world again. I want to go to Giants Stadium in New York and play to anywhere from 50,000 to 80,000 people. No one has come close to anything like that ... not Dane Cook, not the Kings of Comedy (D.L. Hughley, Cedric the Entertainer, Steve Harvey and Bernie Mac). ... '"

Clay's outrageous, profane act not only sold out arenas back in the '80s, it earned him a ban from MTV in 1989 (for offensive language and jokes on the MTV Video Music Awards). He says he hasn't mellowed with age. "My standup is probably more brutal and honest than it's ever been in my entire career," he says. "I've kept up with the times as far as what I'm talking about on stage. I do feel that people are angry, and living in a time of war and uncertainty, people get afraid ... I mean, I'm not a political guy, but I'm allowed to say what I want and do what I want, and that's real America."

Clay says if all goes as planned he'll do Giants Stadium "this summer. I'm calling it an American Event, and I told management when we do Giants Stadium we gotta give away tickets to thousands of the military who have come home."

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ON THE FAST TRACK: "Nashville Star" winner Angela Hacker says she was thrown into the fire immediately after beating out her competitors in the USA Network talent show.

"The last show was March 1, and we went in the studio to record March 2," says the singer/songwriter, who was competing against her own brother Zac Hacker on "Nashville Star." She says her debut CD, "The Winner Is ... Angela Hacker; Season Five: Nashville Star" was "done in less than a week, and honestly, I didn't have the greatest of expectations with it being done that fast. I was afraid I wouldn't have anything on there that would be really me, but I've got four original songs on the album, and they sound great." She adds brother Zac "came in and sang, and the guys from the Nashville Star band played on the record."

The CD is being rushed to record stores by Tuesday (4/3), and Hacker says she's gearing up to head out on the Nashville Star Tour in June. "We have an outline of what's already been booked through September, and we're looking at anywhere from 30 to 40 dates in different parts of the country."

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THE BIG SCREEN SCENE: "I always liked playing romantic leads, because they're more interesting characters, in a way," says Richard Gere. "I found them interesting because they related to my own life, and my own searches for a way to make this man-woman thing look right and feel good. But now, certainly young-romantic-man roles are not appropriate for me." In a wide-ranging interview in the next issue of Entertainment Weekly, the actor, now 57, explains, "I need to pick parts that I can bring my thing to, and it's a different thing available to me than I had when I was 26 or 27." Gere plays Clifford Irving in the April 6 release "The Hoax," based on the real-life media frenzy over Irving's fake "authorized" Howard Hughes biography.

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THAT'S SHOW BUSINESS: The Coyote Ugly saloons gained national attention in 2000, when Piper Perabo starred in the movie "Coyote Ugly" as an aspiring songwriter who made a living as a Coyote bartender. However, according to the bar owner, Liliana "Lil" Lovell, it has taken the CMT reality show, "Ultimate Coyote Ugly Search," to finally give her girls the respect they deserve. "What it's done is taken away this feeling like it was raunchy. Now it's become sexy. It's empowered women," she claims, speaking of her female bartenders, who are known for their wild antics like dancing on the bar and breathing fire. "I think the show tells the real story about how hard these people work."

In the new season, which premieres tomorrow (3/30), the quest for the most deserving Coyote bartender has paired five newcomers with five veterans, who must compete in a series of singing, dancing, and bartending challenges. "A lot of it is about personality because the reality is, you could be the most gorgeous person in the world, but if you don't have the personality to pull it off, it's not going to work. It's about being a strong woman. It's about feeling comfortable in your own skin," says Lil.

 

LONDON (UPI) -- Rappers Snoop Dogg and P Diddy canceled several UK concerts after efforts failed to reverse a decision to deny Snoop Dogg a visa, a tour spokesman said.

The spokesman said musicians were "incredibly disappointed and devastated" that they were forced to cancel Tuesday's performance in London, as well as shows in Cardiff, Manchester, Glasgow and Nottingham, the BBC said.

The tour is scheduled to resume in Dublin, with shows on March 31 and April 1.

Interviewed in Amsterdam, Snoop Dogg, whose real name is Calvin Broadus, said he was frustrated at British authorities late decision to deny him a visa.

"They knew I was coming six, seven weeks ago, so they could have denied me access then," he told MTV. "I cannot control my past -- me being an ex-gang member, ex-drug dealer -- but I know how to do what's right, how to turn my life around."

The British Foreign and Commonwealth Office said it cannot comment on individual cases.

The 35-year-old rapper is facing weapons and drug charges in the United States, stemming from three separate arrests in 2006. Earlier this month, Snoop was detained by Swedish police on suspicion of drug use.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Village wages battle for war chariot

MONTELEONE DE SPOLETO, Italy (UPI) -- Leaders of an Italian village said they hope the U.S. Congress can help in a running battle with the Metropolitan Museum of Art over an Etruscan war chariot.

Nando Durastanti, mayor of Monteleone de Spoleto, met with his Hamilton, N.J., counterpart, Glen Gilmore, who during a recent trip to Italy told him he'd take the request to his U.S. senator, ANSA said. Durastanti said a voice in Congress might sway New York's Met, which has turned a deaf ear to pleas for the chariot's return.

According to local lore, the bronze-and-ivory chariot, estimated to be 2,600 years old, was unearthed in 1902 by a local farmer, who reportedly swapped it for two cows. It wound up in Florence the next year, when it was sold to the Met.

The Italians, if they take a legal road, face an uphill battle in getting the chariot returned. The Met says it has owned the chariot for 100 years, noting that any deadline for a legal claim would have lapsed long ago.

Still, villagers are girding for their demonstration outside the U.S. Embassy in Rome, timed to coincide with the opening of the Met's remodeled Greek and Roman galleries -- starring the chariot.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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MTV's 'Punk'd' punks out

NEW YORK (UPI) -- No joke -- this season will be the last for "Punk'd," New York-based MTV's celebrity prank show.

The cable network said the upcoming season would be the last for "Punk'd from co-creators and executive producers Ashton Kutcher and Jason Goldberg, Hollywood Reporter said Tuesday.

MTV said it plans to debut the entire final season in a "Sneak Peek Marathon" April 7. The series premieres April 10.

"We decided to make an event out of it," said Brian Graden, president of entertainment at MTV Networks Music Group.

Graden said it was unlikely that most viewers would watch the entire eight-episode block, adding that he hoped it would generate buzz for the show in its regular time slot.

As for this being the last season, Kutcher announced before that he was ending "Punk'd" -- only for the show to return the next year. However, Graden said Monday the show is officially ending this time.

As a tribute to the final season, Kutcher will host a special "Punk'd Awards" honoring all eight seasons June 5.

Unsuspecting celebrities "Punk'd" this season include Hilary Swank, Magic Johnson, Evangeline Lilly, Nelly Furtado and Hayden Panettiere.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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U2's the Edge donates guitar for charity

LOS ANGELES (UPI) -- U2 guitarist the Edge donated a guitar to a rock auction for Music Rising, his campaign to replace instruments Gulf Coast musicians lost to Hurricane Katrina.

The Edge's 1975 Cream Gibson Les Paul guitar will be auctioned April 21 along with one of Jimi Hendrix's guitars and a guitar especially created for Music Rising and autographed by members of the Rolling Stones, the Los Angeles Times said. Other items to be auctioned include a pair of John Lennon's sunglasses and lyrics written in Bruce Springsteen's hand.

Some key items of the approximately 200 pieces of rock memorabilia will be available for viewing in Los Angeles, Dublin, London and New York in the weeks leading to the auction.

The auction will be at the Hard Rock Cafe in New York.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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The Hollywood Exclusive

By Marilyn Beck and Stacy Jenel Smith

No Acting for Rzeznick, Who Hates It When Actors Want a Band/Rita Wilson Wows Celeb-Packed Audience in L.A. Stage Bow

Hollywood might be interested in Goo Goo Dolls singer/songwriter/guitarist Johnny Rzeznick, who's known for his charisma and sex appeal, but Rzeznick has no interest in turning thespian.

"You know what, the world doesn't need another musician who wants to be an actor. And the world needs even less another actor who wants to have a band. I hate that," declares Rzeznick, who's rolling into Los Angeles with fellow Goos Robby Takac and Mike Malinin to play the Wiltern Theater Friday (3/31).

"You have these actors who have so much money to put into a vanity project getting attention instead of some kids in a garage band who've put their blood and soul into it. Although -- Kiefer Sutherland has been doing some cool stuff with Rocco DeLuca," he adds, referring to the "24" star and his Ironworks record label artist. "So there are exceptions, yeah, but he's the only one I can think of at the moment."

The Goo Goo Dolls, whose special edition "Let Love In/Live and Intimate" CD/DVD was released last month, are wrapping up the latest leg of the "Let Love In" tour that launched last summer. "What's really cool is that now when we do a show in Los Angeles, we don't have to do anything for industry people. It's not like an industry hang, or anything like that. It's just about playing the music and having a good time. We don't have to prove anything to anyone anymore," says Rzeznick, whose band hit a record 12 Top 10 hits on the Hot AC charts last year.

He notes that the technology-driven changes in the music industry "have been great in some ways, but devastating to a lot of people. Nobody sells the kind of records they used to. It's amazing to me that SoundScan doesn't include digital sales. It's like, 'You only scanned 450,000 records.' Well, yeah, but we also sold 100,000 on iTunes."

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FILMLAND FLAIR: A proud Tom Hanks was front and center as his wife Rita Wilson wowed 'em at the world premiere this week of Lisa Loomer's "Distracted" on Los Angeles' Mark Taper Forum stage. Also there to cheer her on was an A-list lineup of celebs that included Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban, Steven Spielberg, David Geffen, Arianna Huffington, Rob Reiner, "The West Wing's" Allison Janney and Janel Maloney, Eugene Levy, Martin Short and Lucy Lawless. The cast also features Bronson Pinchot, but it is Rita who dominates. She is on stage from beginning to end of the work in which she portrays a mother caught up in an over-stimulated world of multi-tasking, who fights to find a remedy for her son, labeled a victim of Attention Deficient Disorder (ADD). No plans yet for the play after it finishes its run here on April 29, but if it follows the same course as Loomer's last work, "Living Out," it will end up on Broadway.

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AN 'N' NO: Dave Chappelle is reuniting with his "Dave Chappelle Show" cohort Paul Mooney on a pilot for BET called "Judge Mooney." According to Mooney -- who's remembered as "The Chappelle Show's" resident psychic, "Negrodamus," the proposed new series has him reenacting actual cases that have already been adjudicated, but in his own special way. "Whatever I say goes. I've also got a little dog that sits on my judge's desk, and I ask the little dog's opinion. If the dog barks, I say, 'Well, the dog says you have to go.' It's real crazy."

Mooney, whose credits include writing for such shows as "Sanford and Son," "Saturday Night Live" and "In Living Color," recently released a DVD of his standup comedy: "Know Your History: Jesus Was Black and So Was Cleopatra."

Interestingly, the man who rose to fame within comedy circles for co-writing some of the late Richard Pryor's most controversial material now declares he's putting a ban on the N-word in his comedy act. When he worked with Pryor "using the word, we were trying to defuse it, trying to desensitize people to it ... take the power out of it," explains Mooney. "But the word is an equal opportunity word now with Latin kids and white kids saying it, and what it conjures up is all these demons. I watched the Michael Richards meltdown over and over, and I had an 'N'-exorcism."

He adds, "And I don't care how you spell it, with an 'a' or an 'er,' if you saute or barbecue a goat, it's still a goat." Be forewarned, "Jesus was Black and So Was Cleopatra" is laced with the "N" word, but Mooney says it was taped before the whole Richards' incident opened his eyes. "I was married to the word then, now I'm divorced from the word."

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MAKING BOOK: Treat Williams and writing partner Robert Neubecker wrote a children's book that's just been bought by Disney's Hyperion publishers. "My son and a couple other guys and their sons -- a Vietnam fighter pilot and a guy who flew for Delta for 30 years -- flew to the Oshkosh Airshow and were there for about a week," Williams says of the annual Wisconsin event that draws aviators from around the globe. "We wanted to capture the experience in some meaningful way, so we wrote a book for kids about flying and about going to Oshkosh in the family plane. We're already working on a second book."

 

NEW YORK (UPI) -- New York police said they were ready in case of retaliation against rapper Yayo for allegedly roughing up a teen for wearing a rival rap group's shirt.

The 14-year-old allegedly roughed up by members of the G-Unit was the son of the head of Czar Entertainment, the New York Post said Monday.

Released on a $5,000 cash bond after being arranged on misdemeanor charges of assault and endangering the welfare of a child was G-Unit artist Tony Yayo. Prosecutors allege Yayo pushed around the 14-year-old son of Czar Entertainment chief Jimmy "Henchman" Rosemond, who represents rival rapper The Game.

Yayo is an associate of rap star 50 Cent.

Hip-hop bloggers Sunday speculated about the prospect of revenge. New York police said they were on the alert in case of retaliation against Yayo and his friends.

Rosemond's lawyer noted a criminal complaint was filed and the boy's family doesn't "want to be anywhere near" Yayo.

"The whole family is upset," said attorney Jeffrey Lichtman.

Lichtman said the teen was on his way to an internship at his father's office when he was spotted by 50 cent and other G-Unit rappers.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Queen's music rocks mountain movie

TORONTO, Ontario (UPI) -- Hard rock and rock climbing were a natural match in "The Alps," the latest film from Canada-based IMAX Theaters that will arrive in theaters this summer.

Composer Steve Wood collaborated with guitarist Brian May and the rock band Queen on the score for the MacGillvray Freemans Films project that tells the story of rock climber John Harlin III as he attempts to scale the Eiger North Face, the legendary Swiss mountain that took his renowned father's life.

The film was directed by Stephen Judson, who co-wrote it with Stephen Venables.

"Queen's music has a real edge, and the challenge was to combine it with orchestral music that reflected the more spiritual, mystical nature of the Alps," Wood said in a release Monday. "Ultimately, I hoped to create something that, like the film, has a kind of distance and grandeur and reflects the story of human beings facing something larger than themselves."

May performs solos on some of the re-arrangements, including "Who Wants To Live Forever" and "It's A Beautiful Day," as well as on pieces by Wood.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Spinster gave rare watercolors to Britain

LONDON (UPI) -- A world-renowned London art gallery has received 51 rare watercolors worth millions of dollars from the estate of a reclusive spinster.

Dorothy Scharf, who died two years ago, lived comfortably in a London flat next door to her mother but was not wealthy, the Times of London said Monday. Yet she became an astute collector, buying eight J.M.W. Turner masterpieces among the other significant paintings dating back to 1750.

Ernst Vegelin, head of the Courtauld Institute of Art Gallery, called her gift, which came as a surprise, the most significant single addition in decades.

"There was a sense of revelation as the boxes opened," he said. "It was wonderful."

Andrew Wyld, who helped advise Scharf on selecting pieces, described her as extremely shy and lonely. "I think of her collection as being her voice," he said. "She found it difficult to communicate with most people verbally."

That's where her mother stepped in. "Communication, including fierce negotiation, was often carried on between us via her mother," he said. "Once the price was right, and details of attribution and provenance agreed, a sense of calm would descend."

The watercolors will be exhibited next year.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Anna Nicole's death ruled accidental

FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla. (UPI) -- Anna Nicole Smith's death was accidental, caused by combined drug toxicity, the Broward County, Fla., Medical Examiner said Monday.

Smith, who died on Feb. 8, had evidence of nine drugs, including valium and antihistamines that were at therapeutic levels, said medical examiner Joshua Perper during a news conference in Fort Lauderdale, Fla.

Toxicology tests also found the presence of chloral hydrate, a sedative, which when combined with the other drugs in her system, led to Smith's death, Perper said. He said her medications included anti-anxiety and anti-depression prescriptions and longevity drugs, such as human growth hormones.

Perper said a viral infection and an infection in Smith's buttocks were contributing factors. He said Smith had a fever of 105 degrees two days prior to her death, but refused to go to the hospital for treatment.

"I do not see ... evidence of homicide" he said, although he did not dismiss "criminal culpability."

Perper also said "the indications of suicide were not strong enough" when balanced against the evidence of an accidental death.

Seminole Police Chief Charlie Tiger said his investigation determined that this was "an accidental overdose."

Monday's ruling, Tiger said, "effectively closes the case on Anna Nicole Smith."


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Stones' Wood celebrates 22nd anniversary

LONDON (UPI) -- The Rolling Stones' Ronnie Wood is celebrating his 22nd wedding anniversary with his wife, Josephine, by holding an art show in London.

It is not just any old art show though, the exhibition features up to 60 watercolors, oil paintings and line drawings of Josephine that were done by Wood himself, The Sunday Telegraph reported.

The rock guitarist has been painting pictures of his wife for about 30 years.

The works, never been on public view before, range from warm and intimate to decidedly risque, the Telegraph said.

All of the art pieces will be in the exhibition "Josephine" at the Scream gallery on Thursday.

"It's kind of the story of our marriage expressed through art," Wood, 59, revealed. "Jo has been my muse."

Some of the paintings also will be for sale.

"He's not selling any of the ones with me naked," said Jo. "I find the idea of a painting of me naked on somebody else's wall a bit weird."


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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'TMNT' ousts '300' for No. 1 at box office

LOS ANGELES (UPI) -- "TMNT," the latest installment in the "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" saga dethroned "300" taking in $24.4 million at the U.S. box office this weekend.

"300" was second with $20.5 million, "Shooter" debuted at No. 3 with $14.5 million, "Wild Hogs was fourth with $14.3 million and "The Last Mimzy" opened at No. 5 with $10.2 million.

All estimated receipts are from Box Office Mojo.

"Premonition" was sixth with $10.1 million, "The Hills Have Eyes 2" No. 7 with $10 million, the R-rated "Reign Over Me" eighth with $8 million, "Pride" No. 9 with $4 million and "Dead Silence" rounded out the Top 10 with $3.4 million.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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S. Korea wants to block porn Web sites

SEOUL (UPI) -- South Korea's Ministry of Information and Communication has asked that the possibility of blocking all foreign pornographic Web sites be investigated.

Ministry official Suh Byung-jo told the Korea Times that the government group Friday asked national fixed-line servers to investigate the matter further and determine if such actions could be done to protect the nation's youth.

"We are set to deny access to porn sites based overseas, with details being unveiled early next week," the ministry's director general said.

"We feel obliged to come up with measures to counter the recent woes caused by adult video clips available on the internet," he added.

Earlier this week, several pornographic clips were made available on sites like Yahoo Korea and were promptly downloaded by tens of thousands of citizens.

Suh told the Times that while such an effort could be costly in terms of both money and Internet connection speeds, the ability to block offending sites would be worth it.

 

SAN DIEGO (UPI) -- A murder suspect featured on "America's Most Wanted" is in custody in San Diego after trying to evade arrest by diving through a closed second-story window.

The U.S. Drug Enforcement Agency said in a release that the only reason Orthia Tyrone Porter didn't plummet to the ground Thursday was because he got caught in the window blinds and agents were able to grab him. Porter sustained a severe neck wound from the broken glass and was hospitalized.

Porter is wanted in a 2006 drug turf war slaying in St. Petersburg, Fla. He had fake identification from California and Georgia and had been using his brother's name.

He was featured on the "America's Most Wanted" program Jan. 27. On its Web site Friday, the show said Porter's arrest was "all thanks to an AMW tipster who pointed cops in the right direction!"

Alan Pleszak, acting DEA special agent in charge in San Diego, said the "constant presence of DEA agents and our Task Force partners on the streets of this community" led to the arrest.

Porter is the 924th fugitive picked up after authorities received a tip by a viewer since the John Walsh-hosted program began airing 20 years ago.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Outdoor movie-watching making a comeback

SACRAMENTO (UPI) -- Starlight and headlights from cars cruising by in Anywhere, USA, provide mood lighting for the latest, low-tech cinematic experience: outdoor movie-viewing.

Across the United States, more and more people are foregoing digital surround sound in darkened cineplexes for the camaraderie of watching movies under the stars in parks or parking lots, the Sacramento Bee said Friday.

"It's all about this nostalgic feel," said Bryan Kennedy, founder of MobMov, a mobile drive-in theater he started two years ago in Berkeley, Calif., that has grown to 140 chapters.

In Sacramento, baby boomer City Councilman Steve Cohn started "Screen on the Green," offering movies at four neighborhood parks in his district during weekends in August.

"It's like a drive-in, but you walk in," Cohn said of his three-year-old venture. "People love it."

Multiplex cinemas, which still screen 90 percent of movie fare, satisfied the need for variety -- but outdoor screenings gives audiences a chance to reconnect with community, said Jonathan Kuntz, a professor of Hollywood history at UCLA.

"We are raising a generation steeped in cyberspace," he said. "It's a way to get them out of that and remind them where humankind came from."


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Pitt, Jolie help start Sudan clinic

KHARTOUM, Sudan (UPI) -- A modern medical clinic is being built in the Sudan thanks to the U.S. star couple Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt, who contributed $100,000 to the project.

The Duk Lost Boys Clinic is expected to serve more than 150,000 people in Duk County when it opens this spring, People magazine reported on its Web site.

"Words cannot express my gratitude and the gratitude of the people of Duk County," said John Dau, who pushed to get the clinic started. "Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt demonstrate the American spirit of generosity. "Hopefully, their donation will inspire others to join us to rebuild southern Sudan."

Dau is director of the non-profit organization Direct Change's Sudan Project. His story was featured in the documentary "God Grew Tired Of Us." Pitt was the executive producer of the film, which premiered in January.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Broadcasters plan Diana anniversary shows

LONDON (UPI) -- Britain's ITV said it will air the "definitive" story of Princess Diana's final hours in a documentary that will mark the 10th anniversary of her death.

"Diana's Last Day" will feature pictures taken by cameramen until the Mercedes she and her companion Dodi Fayed were in crashed in a Paris tunnel on Aug. 31, 1997, the Mirror reported Friday.

Director of television Simon Shaps said the broadcaster "thought very carefully about what to show" when it decided not to show images of her final moments.

ITV said it also commissioned a show featuring unseen footage of Diana taken when she was at public appearances. It plans to show the award-winning film, "The Queen," which concerns how the royal family responded to Diana's death.

Five is making $3.9 million docu-drama about Diana's final weeks.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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The Hollywood Exclusive

By Marilyn Beck and Stacy Jenel Smith

Joel Madden Annoyed by Personal Swipes in Album Reviews/Hardin Shoots Down 'Office' Pregnancy Rumor

Good Charlotte frontman Joel Madden is aggravated by personal swipes in a number of reviews of the band's new "Good Morning Revival" album -- attacks in the form of snarky comments about his romantic involvements with Hillary Duff and Nicole Richie, his making the nightclub scene and hobnobbing with Hollywood A-listers.

"All credibility goes out the window when someone refers to your personal life rather than the music you're doing," declares Madden, who returns with his band mates to the States this week for the album launch after several weeks of touring Europe. "Some of the things they've said are really small, you know, and so cliche. I really do feel this angry, jealous, hateful kind of thing going on."

He adds, "I've never been the kind of person who's out bragging a lot. I see myself as a dude that's in a band, living life the way I want to live it. If I've done something wrong, I'll evaluate it and apologize. But we've never had anything given to us, and after 11 years, we're working harder than ever to go new places musically and reinvent ourselves."

That's certainly true of "Good Morning Revival," for which the band created some 60 demos over six months before coming up with the collection of songs they and producer Don Gilmore desired. "When we first met with him, he was the only producer who said he wanted to take us into the next phase of our career and make something fresh and exciting. He said, 'If it's not good or different enough, we're not keeping it.' That was the approach we wanted, not the 'If it's not broke, don't fix it' formula," says Madden. "We want to keep moving along, keep the things we love and leave things behind we've grown out of."

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OH, BABY!: "The Office's" Melora Hardin shoots down rumors, before they have a chance to gestate, that her character, Jan, might be expecting a baby by Michael (Steve Carell).

"That's so funny; everybody thought she was pregnant," says Hardin, referring to the recent episode that had her character becoming ill at the end of an office party. "I would love it if they did that. I think it would be really funny and wonderful." However, she adds, "I won't be (pregnant) this season because we're on our last episode." And as for Jan and Michael, Hardin says things aren't looking too good. "Jan and Michael are probably heading for a breakup," she says. "But I think their whole relationship is going to be them coming together and busting apart over and over again. I think they're going to have a very volatile love affair for many years to come."

No baby news may be forthcoming, but Hardin says, "there is a big surprise in the season finale people can look for. I can't say any more than that, but the word 'big' is key, and you'll know what I mean when you see it."

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OH, BABIES!: ABC's "Notes From the Underbelly" pregnancy comedy isn't due for delivery until April 11, but we are already impressed. That is because the half-hour show, from director/producer Barry Sonnenfeld and producers Kim and Eric Tannenbaum ("Two and a Half Men") has turned into a breeding ground for expectant moms, for real. The Tannenbaums just welcomed their baby girl, conceived while the show was in production. Creator and executive producer Stacy Traub is due the end of June. Series star Michael Weaver (who, ironically, plays the one guy on the show who is happily single and childless) and his wife are expecting any day, and two of the male writers' wives became pregnant during the shoot.

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THE BIG SCREEN SCENE: Virginia Madsen has been taking some time off for herself since filming "The Astronaut Farmer" and "The Number 23," but says she's now ready to get back to the grind. "I took about six months off to be with my son because I home school him now," she reports. "I'm eager to get back to work, so I'm reading a lot of scripts and trying to find something I love. Alexander [Payne] is working on his new script, and I'm trying to find a way to manipulate my way onto that project." She certainly had a lot of luck with the "Sideways" director/writer the first time around.

Madsen, by the way, considers Billy Bob Thornton's heroic, family-oriented "Astronaut Farmer" character to be closer to the actor's real personality than his other roles. "I know he's got a lot of tattoos, and he likes to play rock 'n' roll, but he's a real sweet guy," she says of Thornton. "I think Billy Bob and I felt like the roles we played in 'Astronaut Farmer' were more like us than anything we've ever played. And I love that people can see him as heroic, because he really is. He's so generous and just a loveable guy. I'm sure he'd hate I said that. No guy wants to hear that about himself."

 

DEAR MS. SMITH: In February, you answered a question regarding obtaining "The Six Million Dollar Man" TV series on DVD and stated such DVDs were available at certain websites and specifically mentioned TVAddicts.tv. I followed your advice and purchased 29 DVDs (the complete five-season run) for a cost of $138.98. Although my credit card was billed for that amount, I received only six DVDs, the first season. Repeated phone calls and messages to this company have not been returned ... I now must go through the hassle of trying to recover my money through my credit card company ... I think you have done a disservice to your readers by recommending a company that is not legitimate. At a minimum, I think you owe it to your readers to print a retraction and an apology. -- Brian K., Austin, Texas

DEAR BRIAN: As you know from our phone conversation and subsequent e-mails, I've been attempting to follow up on this on your behalf, and you certainly have that apology. Although I did have a recommendation on this site, it obviously was not good enough. Numerous calls and mailings have failed to yield results or gone unanswered.

Steve Cox, vice president of communications for the Council of Better Business Bureaus in Arlington, Va., notes that if you contact BBB.org, they can put the company on report to prevent other consumers from using it. They also offer dispute resolution services, and "We have the ability to facilitate the process of giving information to the state's attorney general's office or federal attorney general's office for law enforcement action."

It's good that you used your credit card, as Cox notes, "We encourage everybody to pay by the safest means possible, and quite frankly that is by use of a credit card, because that comes with federal protections." His other tips on pre-purchase actions: 1. "Know who you're dealing with. If it's not a recognizable name, contact BBB.org, and we can run a search on the company, see if there've been complaints against it, and provide a reliability report." 2. "Get all the details. Look for a physical address of the seller, the cancellation and return policies. Basically, read the fine print." 3. "Keep all your documentation, confirmation pages, tracking numbers, all that stuff." 4. "Look for signs an online purchase is secure. Most sites begin with the URL http. For a secure address, the URL should begin with Shttp or Https."

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DEAR STACY: I miss the forceful acting of Richard Widmark. I presume he is retired? -- Ruth U., New York, N.Y.

DEAR RUTH: Now 92 years old and living in Roxbury, Conn. -- where he's resided since the 1950s -- the unforgettable movie tough guy retired about 16 years ago. His wife of 55 years, screenwriter Jean Hazlewood, suffered from Alzheimer's disease, and finally passed away in 1997. (They had one daughter.) He wed Susan Blanchard -- the stepdaughter of Oscar Hammerstein and former wife of Widmark's friend Henry Fonda -- in 1999. Widmark famously avoids press interviews, having once declared, "I think a performer should do his work and then shut up."

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DEAR STACY: Can you tell me whether "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" is coming back on? That is one strange show. -- Patty C., Cleveland

DEAR PATTY: FX did pick up the critically acclaimed Rob McElhenney sitcom about four dissolute lowlife friends, which features Danny DeVito, for a third season. It is expected to debut this coming summer.

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DEAR STACY: What can you tell me about Amanda Bynes since "What I Like About You" ended? Her age, dating status, plans for more movies, etc.? -- J.N., Brooklyn, N.Y.

DEAR J.N.: Bynes, who turns 21 on April 3, plays Penny Pingleton in the big-screen version of the musical "Hairspray," with John Travolta as Edna Turnblad, opening July 20. In mid-February, she started making "Sydney White," a modern-day send-up on the Snow White fairy tale set on a college campus. Her "Lovewrecked" comedy was just released on DVD. Bynes isn't in school now but has stated her intention to go to college, with NYU her preference. She is single and doesn't flaunt her private life, but was caught by paparazzi in an on-street embrace with her hunky "She's the Man" leading man, Channing Tatum, a year ago, sparking a firestorm of rumors about a romance. That was pretty much the end of that. She was previously involved with Nick Zano.

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DEAR STACY: What happened to Dennis Farina? He was the perfect replacement for the late Jerry Orbach on "Law & Order." -- Herb D., Narrowsburg, N.Y.

DEAR HERB: Farina's been busy working in films since parting company with "L&O" last year. He has the independent feature "You Kill Me," about a hit man who falls for the widow of one of his victims, due for limited release in June. That one also includes Luke Wilson, Ben Kingsley, Tea Leoni, Bill Pullman and Philip Baker Hall. He's among the cast of the forthcoming improvisational comedy "The Grand," which takes place at a poker tournament, with Woody Harrelson, Cheryl Hines and Estelle Harris, among others. He appears in "National Lampoon's Bag Boy," which is targeted for release later this year. He is also one of the stars of Edward Burns' "Purple Violets," along with Burns, Debra Messing, Patrick Wilson and Selma Blair.

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DEAR STACY: I recently started watching "The District" and was wondering what Craig T. Nelson was doing these days? I haven't seen him in a while. -- Randi T., Commack, N.Y.

DEAR RANDI: Nelson's featured as the coach in the big-screen "Blades of Glory" comedy that hits theaters Friday (3/30), with Will Ferrell and Jon Heder as unlikely pairs figure skating partners.

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DEAR STACY: Please settle a trivial question among friends. Which star made the biggest money for making a commercial? -- Lauren S., Canton, Ohio

DEAR LAUREN: Nicole Kidman made $3.71 million for a four-minute commercial for Chanel No. 5, which gave her the highest salary per minute designation in the Guinness Book of World Records: $928,800-per-minute.

 

ALL MY CHILDREN: Adam is devastated by Krystal's duplicity and is crushed that he isn't Charlotte's father. Adam disowns J.R., claiming he stopped being a Chandler the moment he chose Babe and Krystal over his own father. Tad can't believe that J.R. denied his mother her dying wish in order to serve his own agenda. Tad and Adam find themselves in a standoff when Tad insists on staying at the mansion for as long as Krystal is there so that he can look out for the welfare of his unborn child. J.R. discovers that Babe and Little Adam are missing as the power goes off in the mansion. Kendall accuses Bianca of falling for Zoe and warns her sister against it. Although she admits she's in love with Ryan, Annie turns down his proposal, as she believes he isn't truly in love with her. Zach has his work cut out for him as he tries to assure Erica that he will always protect Kendall and their children.

SNEAK PEEK: Tad sets up Adam.

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AS THE WORLD TURNS: Paul tries to explain to Meg why he took Ethan. Paul phones Lily and reveals that the baby is with them. When Ethan becomes ill, Meg and Paul rush him to the hospital. Paul fears all of the baby food is tainted. Meg asks a nurse to test the food. Lily is adamant the baby food did not make Ethan sick. Another baby is admitted, and Lily hears the mother say the only thing her baby has eaten is Valley's Best Baby Food. Ethan's tests come back positive for E. coli. Lily is panicked, but a calm Craig offers to take care of things. Craig calls Lily, telling her he's handled the lawsuit crisis by finding money to make a settlement. A grateful Lily accepts his help. Craig produces papers for Lily to sign. Lily signs the papers without reading a word. Gwen learns that Iris has been making it seem as if Adam is alive. Maddie tells Casey that she killed his brother. While watching a porn movie with a client, Emily is stunned when Alison is the featured player.

SNEAK PEEK: Iris confronts Gwen.

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BOLD AND BEAUTIFUL: Jackie and Donna decide they must break up Brooke and Ridge before their wedding. Donna and Jackie think they can use Rick and Phoebe's romance to destroy Brooke and Ridge's wedding plans. Ridge and Taylor catch Phoebe sitting in Rick's lap, giving him a haircut. Ridge fires Phoebe because he believes her actions are getting reckless. Taylor gives an embarrassed Phoebe the sex talk and then convinces Ridge to let Phoebe stay at Forrester Originals. Ridge warns Phoebe and Rick to stay away from each other in Australia, as he does not want any bad press for the new fashion line. Ashley is surprised when Rick informs her that he and Phoebe have not been intimate. Ashley tells Stephanie she will accept the job offer and develop the new fragrance line. Stephanie visits Taylor at her office. She tells her she wants her to be part of the family again, but Taylor makes it clear that she loves Nick. Nick informs Taylor he loves her.

SNEAK PEEK: Wedding bell blues.

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DAYS OF OUR LIVES: Billie and Steve crash their car. Kayla and Marlena use the map Billie left behind to follow her and Steve. Kayla vows that once Steve is safely back in the hospital, she's going after E.J. herself. Marlena calls Roman and tells him where they are and what they're doing. Steve carries an unconscious Billie to a cabin. She suggests he go back and get help. When he opens the door to leave, Kayla and Marlena are there. Steve pretends to be "the old Steve" again, trying to convince Kayla to let him go. Kayla starts to fall for it -- but she tests him by kissing him and realizes he's lying to her. Marlena tranquilizes Steve, as the police arrive to take him back to Salem.

SNEAK PEEK: Celeste pressures Sami to kill E.J.

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GENERAL HOSPITAL: Ric searches for someone to infiltrate Sonny's organization. Mr. Craig lets Nikolas suffer before administering the antidote to the poison. Nikolas makes the noble sacrifice of pushing Emily away for her own safety, claiming he needs his space. Nikolas returns to Wyndemere to discover Robin treating Mr. Craig's gunshot wound. Lulu wonders how Jason can agree not to be a part of his child's life. Jason confesses that he thinks about the baby all the time but feels he's made the decision that works out best for everyone. Spinelli jumps into action as Lulu is about to spill the paternity secret at Lucky and Elizabeth's wedding. Tracy and Luke know that Alan had intended to leave everything to any child Jason might have. Scott breaks down as he confesses to an unresponsive Laura how he killed Rick Webber. He apologizes and vows that he'll always love her. Alcazar continues to con Skye as he plots Sonny's demise. Jax realizes Coop was one of the mercenaries and informs Sonny. Sonny has plans for Coop.

SNEAK PEEK: Sam becomes a national hero.

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GUIDING LIGHT: Cyrus insists to Matt and Vanessa that he's changed his ways and he doesn't hold anything against Vanessa for sending him to prison. Cyrus steals Dinah's bracelet. Gus calls Harley and tells her that Alan did wake up -- but Rick administered a sedative to put him back in a comatose state. As Gus tries cheer up Daisy, he goes to give her a kiss on the cheek -- but accidentally kisses her on the lips. He's deeply apologetic, but Daisy is thrilled. Doris reveals new evidence in Alan's shooting: It wasn't in self-defense -- the bullet came from seven feet away. The lowest sentence Doris will allow is 10 years. Josh changes his mind and refuses to agree to the deal. Reva is about to find the hollowed book containing the gun when Alan-Michael catches her and goes to call the cops. While Reva is being questioned by the police, Alan-Michael warns Lizzie she better keep quiet about the secret book.

SNEAK PEEK: Alan-Michael plots.

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ONE LIFE TO LIVE: Evangeline jumps to the wrong conclusion when she sees Layla with Cristian and assumes they slept together. Layla is hurt that her sister would think the worst about her. Evangeline and Cristian admit they still care about one another. Blair misinterprets Todd and Cristian's heated argument, and blurts out the truth that she and Cristian slept together. Todd lunges at Cole, believing he and Starr had sex. Michael, Marcie, Roxy and Dorian are caught in the middle of an armed robbery at the hair salon. John and Natalie race out after getting news of the robbery. In the aftermath of the robbery, Natalie assumes that John intended to ask her to marry him. John is put in an awkward position when Natalie accepts the proposal he has yet to make. Nora is anxious for Bo to apprehend the arsonist -- all the evidence points to Vincent. Miles lets Marty know he would like to be more than just friends. Dorian seethes when Viki boldly crashes her and Clint's dinner date at the Palace.

SNEAK PEEK: Natalie is heartbroken.

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PASSION: Noah and Paloma are disheartened when Jessica returns to Spike. At the Crane cabin, Luis pulls away from his kiss with Sheridan. Luis and Sheridan are taken by surprise when Fancy shows up at the cabin and aims a gun at them. Having called Sam, Fancy feels guilty when the police chief arrives and takes Luis into custody. Fancy explains she saw very compromising footage of Sheridan and him on the video surveillance. Luis swears he was just helping Sheridan get over her grief about Marty. Fancy catches Sheridan eavesdropping and informs her aunt that she can have Luis -- she's done. Theresa panics when Jared lies that Dr. Russell said he was well enough to get married. Theresa figures out Jared isn't telling the truth and insists they wait until he's in better health. Kay wonders how to tell her dying husband that she is leaving him. Unable to escape thoughts of Vincent, Chad roughly makes love to Whitney, who's thrilled -- yet somewhat confused -- by his intensity. Ethan and Theresa bask in the afterglow of their lovemaking.

SNEAK PEEK: Fancy fights Sheridan.

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YOUNG AND RESTLESS: Nikki reveals to Victoria that she's going to run against Neil for the seat on the Newman board of directors in order to stop Jack's Clear Springs project. Sharon tries to convince Phyllis not to reveal her past affair with Brad. Phyllis replies that she wants Brad to vote her way on the Clear Springs project and that blackmailing them gives her the leverage she needs. With his tiebreaking vote, Victor names Neil to the board. Gloria enters and tells Jill that she thinks that she should be the "nice" judge and Jill should be the "mean" judge on "Celebrity Catwalk." Amber rushes over to Daniel's apartment with the news that Cane has bought an airplane ticket to go back to Australia tonight. Amber explains that now that Cane has found out Jill is not his mother, he really has no reason to stay in Genoa City. Amber admits that she thought that Cane was a Chancellor and she married him for his money. Kay believes regardless of what the DNA test says, Cane is Jill's son. Jack asks Sharon to marry him.

SNEAK PEEK: Jill comes clean.

 

"The Last Mimzy" (PG, 1 hr., 30 min.)

Kids 10 and older into physics, astronomy, math, and/or the idea of time travel are ideal customers for "The Last Mimzy," even though the film is a bit of a mess. Despite charming child actors and a cool central idea, the movie trips over a convoluted narrative, extraneous details and adult characters exuding 9/11 paranoia. It is also scary and emotionally harrowing at times, and too intense for many kids under 10. We see a little girl nearly sucked into a space/time vortex. We see her become nearly hysterical when her mother throws out the magical new "toys" she and her brother have found. The movie shows the kids levitating themselves, moving objects just by thinking and communicating telepathically with each other and a seemingly inert stuffed rabbit. There is also talk of the world ending. Kid characters say things "suck" and that hamburgers are made of "chopped-up cow." We also see a two-headed snake, spiders and cockroaches. On a less icky level, "The Last Mimzy" has FBI agents invading a home and carting a family off for questioning under the Patriot Act, which could disturb kids (let alone adults).

"The Last Mimzy" is based on a 1943 short story, its title taken from Lewis Carroll's poem "Jabberwocky" in "Through the Looking-Glass." In the film, 10-year-old Noah (Chris O'Neil) and his little sister Emma (Rhiannon Leigh Wryn) find a carved box on the beach containing crystals, stones and other objects that float, spin, make whirring noises and seem ready to do much more. There's also a stuffed rabbit. Soon Noah builds genius science projects and Emma claims she's talking to the rabbit, Mimzy, about saving the world. Their parents (Joely Richardson and Timothy Hutton) take notice and so does Homeland Security.

P.S. FOR KIDS 10 AND ODLER: The little girl Emma in "The Last Mimzy" talks a lot about the books "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" and "Through the Looking-Glass" by Lewis Carroll -- two great books.

"TMNT" (PG, 1 hr., 29 min.)

After a 14-year hiatus from feature films, the "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" are back from the world of TV 'toons. That the three PG-rated animated features of yore ("Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" in 1990, followed by sequels in 1991 and 1993) are now joined by "TMNT" is less than a joyous event. The new computer-animated film is dimly lit, hard-edged, mechanical-looking and too violent on the big screen for some kids under 10. Its plot is also very confusing -- at least for adults. It includes semi-harsh language ("the snot kicked out of him"), tired ethnic stereotypes (of people in Central America, playing right into the current immigration debate) and a weird joke most kids won't get, which seems to refer to phone sex lines. The monsters and stone warriors key to the plot loom huge over the TMNTs, eyes glowing. Some look like giant bats, spiders, lobsters, or a cross between a gorilla and a wild boar. There are plot points about ancient monsters or warriors taking over the world. The fights are not portrayed as bloody, but they are big and loud.

The film finds the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, or TMNTs (long ago morphed into powerful turtle-men by a polluted "ooze" and named for Italian Renaissance artists Leonardo, Donatello, Michelangelo and Raphael), a little estranged. Leo has been sent away by Master Splinter to hone his leadership skills. He returns when the Turtles' archeologist pal April (voice of Sarah Michelle Gellar) brings an ancient artifact from Central America for secretive museum director Max Winters (Patrick Stewart). It seems to reanimate 3,000-year-old stone warriors and other monsters -- or something. But first the Turtles must reconcile and prove they can again act as one to fight evil.

"Pride" (PG, 1 hr., 44 min.)

Terrence Howard stars in this fact-based saga as swim coach Jim Ellis, who has taught inner-city Philadelphia kids to swim competitively since the early 1970s. Disjointed, heavy-handed and often too teary-eyed, "Pride" works anyway, because it is a modest film that focuses more on character than on slow-motion sports-movie glitz shots (though there's some of that, too). Kids 10 and older who like character-driven tales could find "Pride" pretty inspiring. It dramatizes Ellis' early years, not only as a coach but a mentor, trying to get teen athletes to take the sport seriously, avoid street life and learn discipline. They encounter blatant racism when facing other teams, much of it embodied in a bigoted coach played by Tom Arnold. (This is prefigured in a prologue showing Ellis booed by a white Southern crowd at a 1964 college swim meet, where he scuffles with a cop.) That theme, plus occasional racial slurs in the dialogue and a high level of profanity for a PG film -- numerous S-words -- make "Pride" iffy for kids under 10. The film has a rude joke about a broken condom and shows a fistfight, a local thug making threats, and women who seem to be prostitutes.

Struggling after college, Ellis finally gets hired by the city of Philadelphia to close down an old rec center in a rough neighborhood. Instead, he fills up the pool and starts training teens. The young actors are strong, as are Bernie Mac as the center's burned-out maintenance man and Kimberly Elise as a city councilwoman whose brother swims for Ellis.

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Beyond the Ratings Game: Movie Reviews for various ages

-- 8 AND OLDER:

"TMNT" PG (NEW) (First "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle" computer-animated feature since 1993 (there were three, in 1990, '91 and '93, all PGs) is dimly lit, hard-edged, too violent for some under 10, and narratively muddled; this time the four Ninja Turtle fighters (mutated long ago by a polluted "ooze" and named for Italian Renaissance artists Leonardo, Michelangelo, Raphael and Donatello) have become estranged; Master Splinter says they must become one again before fighting a new threat: reanimated stone warriors from ancient Central America, related to an artifact the TMNT's archeologist pal April (voice of Sarah Michelle Gellar) has delivered to a museum director (Patrick Stewart). Semi-harsh language (" snot kicked out of him"); tired ethnic stereotypes; off-color joke most kids won't get refers subtly to phone-sex industry; red-eyed monsters loom huge, along with the ancient warriors; battles between them and TMNTs not shown as bloody, but big and loud.)

"Bridge to Terabithia" PG (Touching story (based on Katherine Paterson's novel) about a deep friendship between fifth-graders Jess (Josh Hutcherson), a budding artist from a rural family that ignores him, and Leslie (AnnaSophia Robb), a free-spirited daughter of wealthy writers; the two create a fantasy world, Terabithia, in the woods, facing down bullies there and in real life; film's gritty naturalism is marred by a charmless, computer-animated effort to visualize Terabithia. Under-8s may be spooked by swooping vultures, giant trolls, armored attack squirrels, and a huge tree that morphs into a troll (pretty cool, actually); adults use mild profanity; kid-scuffles with bloodied noses; verbal references to a girl whose dad hits her; kids discuss religion; WARNING -- PLOT GIVEAWAY: Film's last act deals with strong sense of grief and loss.)

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-- 10 AND OLDER:

"The Last Mimzy" PG (NEW) (Kids into science, idea of time-travel will like film's cool premise, despite its messy, disappointing execution: a 10-year-old boy (Chris O'Neil) and his little sister (Rhiannon Leigh Wryn) find a box on the beach, full of spinning, humming rocks and crystals, plus a stuffed bunny that "talks" to the little girl about saving a doomed world; soon their parents (Timothy Hutton, Joely Richardson) and Homeland Security are concerned. Too intense for some under 10: adult characters voice 9/11 paranoia; little girl hysterical when her mother throws out the magical "toys"; later she's nearly sucked into a space/time vortex; kids levitate themselves, move objects or talk telepathically; kids say things "suck" and hamburgers are "chopped-up cow"; two-headed snake; bugs; federal agents drag a family off for questioning; teacher lives with his girlfriend; talk of reincarnation.)

"Pride" PG (NEW) (Terrence Howard is charismatic as usual in affecting, uplifting, though overly teary-eyed drama about real-life swim coach Jim Ellis and how he began coaching inner-city Philadelphia teens to swim competitively in the early 1970s, helping to turn their ives around despite poverty, racism; Bernie Mac as the burned-out rec center maintenance man inspired by Ellis' dedication; Tom Arnold as a bigoted rival coach. Realistic theme about evils of racism; occasional racial slurs; high level of profanity for a PG film -- much use of the S-word; crude verbal joke about a broken condom; fistfight; rude hand gesture; local thug makes threats; women who appear to be prostitutes.)

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-- PG-13s:

"The Namesake" (NEW; LIMITED RELEASE) (Warm, witty, occasionally heartbreaking, utterly involving story (based on Jhumpa Lahiri's novel), marred slightly by superficial portrayals of one or two key supporting characters, about a couple from 1970s Calcutta who enter into an arranged marriage and move to New York; film chronicles how they and their children tangle over how much tradition to keep in America, how much to let go; they feel estranged from their son (Kal Penn) when he brings home a rich, white girl (Jacinda Barrett) and spends more time with her family; highly evocative film is ethnically specific, yet universal, with a subtle literary thread running through it. Steamy but nonexplicit sexual situations; rear-view nudity; flashbacks of train accident; one scene showing bloodied victims; themes of grief, loss; marijuana; drinking; smoking; rare profanity. High-schoolers.)

"Premonition" (Sandra Bullock stranded in a corny, endlessly derivative, clunkily directed supernatural thriller about a stay-at-home mom who has a time-bending flash-forward to hearing news of her husband's (Julian McMahon) accidental death, then wakes up the next day to find him alive; the process repeats -- one day he's dead, the next alive; her sanity questioned, she tries to solve the mystery. Some teens could be upset by: film's sense of numbing grief, loss; brief glimpse of a severed head; a fiery crash; a bloodied decomposing crow; stitched-up wounds on a child's face; character dragged screaming to a psychiatric ward and given injection; child having a bad, but not life-threatening, accident; mild sexual innuendo in marital scenes; rare strongish profanity; subtle allusions to infidelity, suicide; smoking; drinking; tranquilizers.)

"Wild Hogs" (Slow to start, but ultimately amusing comedy about four middle-aged Cincinnati guys (Tim Allen, John Travolta, Martin Lawrence and William H. Macy) who toss their cell phones and go on a cross-country motorcycle trip; in New Mexico they face a "real" motorcycle gang (led by Ray Liotta). Too lewd to be a total family comedy; crude language; sexual innuendo -- much of it homophobic; gross toilet humor; considerable midrange profanity; comic fights, mayhem; skinny-dipping scene with a character naked from behind; condom joke; prolonged subplot about a gay state trooper (John C. McGinley) who nearly stalks the guys; free-for-all fight; drinking, smoking. OK for high-schoolers.)

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-- R's:

"Shooter" (NEW) (Rip-snorter action thriller moves so supercool fast (directed by Antoine Fuqua, who did "Training Day" R, 2001) audiences won't have time to trip over logical/logistical speed-bumps in the script (based on Washington Post film critic Stephen Hunter's novel, "Point of Impact"); Mark Wahlberg as Bob Lee Swagger, ex-Marine sniper, who leaves the military after his superiors betray him during a secret mission; a civilian mountain man three years later, he's recruited by an ex-colonel (Danny Glover) to use his sniper skills to stop a presidential assassination; again he's betrayed -- set up as a would-be assassin, wounded and on the run, aided by Michael Pena as a rooky FBI agent, Kate Mara as his Marine buddy's widow. High-powered point-blank and long-distance shootings with much blood, occasional gore; gun suicide; fingers, then arm shot off; do-it-yourself bullet removal; villain's implied intention to commit rape; strong profanity; beer. Action fans 16 and older.)

"I Think I Love My Wife" (Chris Rock co-wrote, directed and stars in edgy, profane, moderately sprightly, but superficial comedy -- a Rock-coarsened update of a 1972 French film "Chloe in the Afternoon" (R); he plays a family guy toying with cheating on his wife (Gina Torres) with a gorgeous acquaintance (Kerry Washington) who appears at his office, flaunting her allure; he starts a flirtation, debates his moral choices. Repeated use of F-word in both nonsexual and sexual meanings; other graphic sexual language; rare steamy, mostly nonexplicit sexual situations, excepting one sequence about that famous 4-hour side effect of Viagra -- no nudity, but graphically implied; racial jokes; rhymes-with-witch word; someone gets beaten up; marijuana; drinking; cigarettes; reference to suicide attempt. Despite its R-nesses, film comes down squarely in favor of fidelity, family. Too raunchy for under-17s.)

"Beyond the Gates" (LIMITED RELEASE) (Understated, yet heart and gut-wrenching fact-based drama (with fictionalized characters) about a British priest (John Hurt) and teacher (Hugh Dancy) at a school in Kigali, Rwanda, who tried to shelter some 2500 Tutsi children and adults during the 1994 genocide; filmed in the actual school, movie re-enacts how United Nations peacekeepers followed orders not to intervene, how European troops rescued whites only. Depictions of people, including a mother and infant, hacked to death with machetes or shot -- harrowing, bloody, but not exploitatively graphic, often partly hidden from view; roads strewn with bodies; murdered nuns, with implication one was also raped or mutilated; painful verbal description of murder of a baby; strong profanity; racial slurs; drinking; smoking. College students.)

"300" (Stunning, digitally enhanced, occasionally giggle-inducing, but mostly epic-feeling and sounding adaptation of graphic novel (by Frank Miller and Lynn Varley) about Sparta's King Leonidas (Gerard Butler) and the Battle of Thermopylae in 480 B.C., when he and 300 men faced Persian emperor Xerxes and his mega-army; narration, dialogue, battles all seem effectively ancient, portentous. Stylized visuals, muted colors make violence seem otherworldly, less gory, but still harrowing -- not for all high-school-age stomachs; spears, daggers through guts, eyes; horses cut down from under warriors; strongly implied rape -- camera cuts away before it becomes graphic; more explicit, but very stylized, sexual montage between Leonidas and his Queen (Lena Headey); back-view nudity; toplessness; a few subtle homoerotic verbal references; mild curses. High-schoolers.)


(c) 2007, Washington Post Writers Group.

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Mills blames McCartney's lawyer for ills

LOS ANGELES (UPI) -- Heather Mills, the estranged wife of ex-Beatle Paul McCartney, blames McCartney's attorneys in London for gumming up divorce proceedings.

Mills, in Los Angeles as a contestant on the U.S. reality show, "Dancing With The Stars," said McCartney's attorney, Fiona Shackleton, was making the process as "difficult as possible," the London Telegraph said Thursday.

If it had been left to her and McCartney, the former model said, "things would have been all right a long time ago."

She discussed her divorce during an interview with CNN's Larry King, saying their relationship was cordial.

"We still have a friendship," she said. "It's only his lawyers that are a nightmare."

A spokesman for Pain Hicks Beach, the London firm where Shackleton is a partner, declined to comment.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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ABC re-ups 11 prime-time shows

LOS ANGELES (UPI) -- Fans of Anne Heche, William Shatner and Matthew Fox can rest easy; ABC renewed "Men in Trees," "Boston Legal" and "Lost" for another season on U.S. airwaves.

The pickup of 11 series was announced as ABC presented its development slate to media buyers in Los Angeles, Variety said.

Also slated to return are "Ugly Betty" and "Brothers & Sisters," "Desperate Housewives," and "Grey's Anatomy." Reality entries "Dancing with the Stars," "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition" and "The Bachelor" also got the OK, as did late-night show "Jimmy Kimmel Live."

The network previously renewed "America's Funniest Home Videos," "Supernanny" and "Wife Swap."

"We have had a strong year, with two of the season's breakout hits, 'Ugly Betty' and 'Brothers & Sisters,' and the solid performance of 'Men in Trees,'" ABC Entertainment president Steve McPherson said. "These shows provide us with a substantial foundation to make '07-08 our best schedule yet."


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Fergie remains 'Glamorous' at No. 1

NEW YORK (UPI) -- Fergie's "Glamorous" was sitting pretty atop the Billboard Hot 100 for the second straight week.

Holding tight at No. 2 was Mims' "This Is Why I'm Hot," which Fergie bumped to claim the top spot two weeks ago.

Also staying put was Akon's "Don't Matter" at No. 3.

Gym Class Heroes' "Cupid's Chokehold" featuring Fall Out Boy's Patrick Stump moved up one, from No. 5 to No. 4, trading spots with Gwen Stefani's "The Sweet Escape" featuring Akon, which dipped to No. 5.

In its 15th week on the chart, Rich Boy's "Throw Some D's" featuring Polow Da Don shot up 21 positions, from No. 27 to No. 6.

Daughtry's "It's Not Over" maintained its No. 7 spot for a second week.

Avril Lavigne's "Girlfriend" and Justin Timberlake's "What Goes Around ... Comes Around" flipped the eighth and ninth spots, with Lavigne moving up to No. 8 and Timberlake sliding to No. 9.

Fall Out Boy's "This Ain't a Scene, It's an Arms Race" completed the top 10, falling from No. 6 to No 10.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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The Hollywood Exclusive

By Marilyn Beck and Stacy Jenel Smith

Williams Flies Back into Series Game/Smiley Sees 'Covenant' Movement as Parties Prep for Primaries

Treat Williams begins production of his forthcoming "Heartland" series in Los Angeles Monday (3/26), with plans to commute back and forth to the Park City, Utah home he and his family established during his "Everwood" tenure.

"At the end of 'Everwood,' I said to my wife, Pam, 'Well, what now?' And she said, 'I want to stay. I love my friends here, and the kids are happy in school.' Fortunately, we have a beautiful airplane we can travel in, and my airport is easy to get in and out of," says the actor, who has 30 years' experience as a pilot. "I go through a canyon to Vegas, and turn right, and I'm there."

The Williamses also maintain a New York City penthouse and a house in Vermont.

Williams says he took time off after "Everwood" after the show finished shooting last April, "I think we all needed it." But from his list of activities since then, it hardly seems possible he's had much in the way of down time. There's his April 15 Lifetime movie, "The Staircase Murders," a true crime story in which Treat plays the accused killer, a best-selling novelist who leads a double life. There's the arc he put in on "Brothers & Sisters." And there's "Heartland," the TNT series in which he will play a heart surgeon specializing in transplants -- a guy he says has nothing in common with his "Everwood" medico, Andy Brown, "other than the fact they're both doctors. There's nothing soft and fuzzy about this guy or this show."

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GRASS ROOTS TAKING HOLD: PBS talk show host Tavis Smiley says he's getting assurances from both the Democratic and Republican parties that they're taking stock of the ideas and solutions he's advocated in his best-selling 2006 book, "The Covenant with Black America," and its follow-up, "The Covenant in Action," which hit stores last month. Smiley's set to moderate live TV forums as primary season advances -- the Democratic forum in June and the Republican in September -- and he tells this column that both party chairs assure him that "all the candidates running for the White House are going to show up to address the issues in 'The Covenant.'"

Smiley notes that in his forward to the new book, renowned scholar Cornel West wrote, "'The challenge was for us to go from moment to momentum to movement.' When the first book came out, that was a moment. We actually put to page a blueprint for Black America being made better. Then as the book started climbing the best-seller list, and people were meeting and talking about it, the momentum started to build. Now this thing is starting to turn into a movement."

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THE WAITING GAME: After a long season of commuting from his Los Angeles home to the shooting of "Friday Night Lights" in Dallas, Kyle Chandler says the first thing on his schedule now "is to do all the fixing-up work around the house I haven't done for the last six or seven months." And when he's done with that, he says, he and his wife are going to pack up their two young daughters "and head out on some nice little vacations, like camping out near some lovely bodies of water. That's what I want to do." The only thing that might interfere with those plans, says Kyle, would be a movie assignment. "A few things are pending," he says.

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HER MAN IN THE TREES: "Men in Trees" regular Suleka Mathew reports when the ABC dramedy returns April 12, things will start to heat up between Sara, the single mom/former prostitute she plays on the show, and a man of the cloth who came into her life before the show's recent hiatus. It's a heat that's already familiar to her, says Mathew, since Sara's love interest is "played by my real boyfriend, Nick Lea."

She explains, "We get together very often as a cast, and our partners come with us for dinner or dancing. After ('MIT' creator) Jenny Bicks met Nick, she said, 'I'm going to keep an eye on a good part for him.' I had so little to do with it, and it worked out beautifully."

Before the show's break, Sara was asked out by a guy she met in an Emergency Medical Training class. "He revealed to me on the date that he was a pastor, and I freaked out because I thought, 'God is going to get me somehow.' My character used to be a prostitute, so she thought, 'This isn't going to work' and bolted.'" Fortunately, she says Pastor Eric "is the kind of man of the cloth who doesn't carry judgments -- and that's so sexy to me."

Mathew says Lea will be in four more shows by season's end. The "Men in Trees" troupe only has two more shows to shoot, and Mathew tips the romantic dramedy will be going out with a bang in the season finale. "I'll say that much on fear of pain and death," she says with a laugh. "I will tell you it's very fun and exciting, but seriously, I fear losing my job at this point."

 

NEW YORK (UPI) -- Comedian Bernie Mac stopped off in New York to chit-chat on CBS' "The Late Show" and drop the bombshell that he's calling it quits as a standup comic.

Mac, 49, said once he gets his performance film "The Whole Truth, Nothing But The Truth, So Help Me Mac" in the theaters, "I'm going to call it," E News said.

He said he's been doing standup in clubs since 1977 and street performances for two years before that, and that was enough.

"I'm going to still do my producing, my films, but I want to enjoy my life a little bit," the Chicago native told David Letterman on Monday night's show. "I missed a lot of things, you know."

Mac started in TV in 1992 on Russell Simmons' "Def Comedy Jam" and then moved on to "Mo' Money" with Damon Wayans before landing his own TV series, "The Bernie Mac Show," which lasted five seasons.

His movie credits include "Bad Santa" and "Ocean's Eleven," and a dramatic turn in the upcoming "Pride."

He also wrote two books, "I Ain't Scared Of You " and "Maybe You Never Cry Again."


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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R&B singer Luther Ingram dies at 69

ST. LOUIS (UPI) -- R&B singer-songwriter Luther Ingram has died at the age of 69 in a St. Louis area hospital of complications from kidney disease.

Ingram, best known for his passionate 1972 hit "(If Loving You Is Wrong) I Don't Want to be Right," had a kidney transplant several years ago, Billboard said.

Born in Jackson, Tenn., Ingram moved to New York in 1966 to record with producers Jerry Leiber and Mike Stoller. After relocating to Memphis, Ingram scored a number of hits on the Koko label, which was distributed by Stax.

He picked up his first top 10 R&B hit in 1970 with "Ain't That Loving You (For More Reasons Than One)." Subsequent R&B hits include "I'll Be Your Shelter (In Time of Storm)" and "Always," Billboard said.

Ingram also wrote the Staple Singers' "Respect Yourself" with Sir Mack Rice.

Ingram, who died Monday, is survived by his wife, two sons, a sister and five brothers.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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DNA samples taken from Birkhead, baby

NASSAU, Bahamas (UPI) -- Anna Nicole Smith's baby and Larry Birkhead, Smith's ex-lover claiming to be the girl's father, gave DNA samples at a Bahaman doctor's office, it was reported.

Both Birkhead and the 6-month-old baby, Dannielynn, were at the office and had samples taken, TMZ.com reported.

Howard K. Stern's DNA was not extracted because by law in the Bahamas, he is presumed to be the father because he is listed as the father on the child's birth certificate.

A Bahaman judge requested samples from Stern and the child during a hearing Tuesday.

The samples will be sent to a lab in Columbus, Ohio, and returned to the Bahamas, possibly in four days, TMZ.com said.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Musiq Soulchild's 'Luvanmusiq' No. 1 album

NEW YORK (UPI) -- R&B artist Musiq Soulchild's "Luvanmusiq" debuted at No. 1 of The Billboard 200, leading six new albums entering the top 10.

New releases also occupied the second and third slots -- R&B singer Lloyd at No. 2 with "Street Love" and Rapper Rich Boy's self-titled album at No. 3.

Daughtry's self-titled RCA debut fell from No. 3 to No. 4, while Akon's "Konvicted" slipped from No. 4 to No. 5.

"Live at Massey Hall 1971" by Neil Young entered the chart at No. 6. British R&B singer Amy Winehouse debuted at No. 7 with "Back to Black."

8Ball & MJG's "Ridin' High" debuted at No. 8 as Fall Out Boy's "Infinity on High" dipped from No. 8 to No. 9.

Carrie Underwood's "Some Hearts" re-enters the top tier at No. 10, moving up from No. 12.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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The Hollywood Exclusive

By Marilyn Beck and Stacy Jenel Smith

LEGEND DOING TOUR, SONGS FOR 'PRIDE,' ARETHA, WHITNEY, JENNIFER/IRA GLASS' FANS CHARY OVER TV MOVE

John Legend reports he and Aretha Franklin have been in the studio of late, recording a tune for her forthcoming J Records album that he wrote especially for the legendary songstress. "It's different for her -- a party song called 'Turn It Up.' It's kind of soulful and funky," he says. "I do a little cameo in there, but it's really her song."

And it's just one activity on the jam-packed agenda of the five-time Grammy-winning singer/songwriter/producer.

First up, Legend has the lead-off soundtrack cut on the Terrence Howard-Bernie Mac "Pride" feature being released by Lionsgate tomorrow (3/23). His soaring "Dare to Dream" anthem captures the feeling of the saga of inner-city Philadelphia swim coach Jim Ellis and his against-all-odds fight to build a swim team there in the 1970s.

"I don't think the song directly sounds like a John Legend song," comments the 28-year-old mega-talent. "It was very collaborative, very much for the movie, not so much me as an artist."

Meanwhile, he's also currently penning tunes for Whitney Houston and Jennifer Hudson and recording his own Home School label's first signee, Estelle -- all while getting ready for the April 3 launch of his spring tour.

"We've got some cool new things we're doing -- new arrangements, unexpected covers. We're bringing in some hip hop, some classic soul and classic rock," reports Legend, speaking of the concert trek that has him sharing the bill with Corinne Bailey Rae until its final two weeks. "We've elevated the production on every level for this tour, musically and visually -- but it's still going to be about the music. I never want to turn it into a high-tech show. What people appreciate about me is that there is an organic feel about the music."

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THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS: Ira Glass is a hit on public radio with his show, "This American Life," which tells the surprisingly true stories of everyday people. In fact, Justin Timberlake's been quoted of late saying that Ira's show is among his faves. But Glass admits his fans weren't too happy when they learned he was taking the show to television as well. "We went on a six-city tour, going in front of public radio crowds, and I asked every crowd if they were worried about us doing a TV show, and there would be an overwhelming response of, 'Yes, we are worried!' I think part of it was that they're public radio people, so they're suspicious of television in general," notes Glass, whose program premieres on Showtime tonight (3/22). "After we showed them some footage, they seemed won over, thrilled that it was very much the same as the radio show."

The response was certainly a relief to Glass, who says he also had reservations about doing TV. "Since we've been so successful on the radio, there was a thought that we can only screw this up, so there was a lot of fear," he notes, but luckily, it turned out better than they expected. "It's different from anything on TV. There's no news hook. We're not trying to say there's a new national scandal or problem. What we do are little dramatic stories that are funny in some places, emotional in other places, and they just happen to be true."

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ANOTHER FRONTIER: Derek Magyar's name may be new to big screen audiences when his film, "Boy Culture," debuts tomorrow (3/23) in New York, Los Angeles and San Francisco before widening its release next month. However, he's a familiar face to "Star Trek: Enterprise" fans, having played the hunky young Chief Engineer Cmdr. Kelby.

In "Boy Culture," based on Matthew Rettenmund's popular novel, Magyar plays a high-class hustler known as X who is confronted with emotions he hasn't felt in years. In the months prior to his death, legendary "Star Trek" creator Gene Roddenberry responded to criticism that there were no gay characters on his series with a statement that said, "In the fifth season of 'Star Trek: The Next Generation,' viewers will see more of shipboard life in some episodes which will, among other things, include gay crew members in day-to-day circumstances." Now Magyar notes, "While that role never materialized, I certainly got my on-the-job training as X."

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DEAD, DEAD, DEAD: As viewers of "CSI" are aware, the show always seems to be reaching out for new and interesting kinds of murders for its crime scene investigators to investigate -- and even by Las Vegas standards, they go waaaay out there. They've had murder set amidst the world of people who dress up as animals for sexual kicks in the past, and a new episode will feature murder involving a UFO cult that believes the earth has been taken over by reptilian aliens who've taken human form. Then there are the deaths themselves. Viewers can look forward to an upcoming episode that has a former boxer victim who was beaten with a bat, shot with a crossbow, poisoned by snake venom, forced into anaphylactic shot and drowned. Just to be sure.

 

NEW YORK (UPI) -- Actress Scarlett Johansson and fabled U.S. actor-director Woody Allen have a mutual adoration society, the actress said in the April issue of Vogue.

"I'd sew the hems of his pants if he asked me to," Johansson, 22, said in the Vogue interview, USA Today reported Tuesday.

For his part, Allen, 71, called his "Match Point" star "criminally sexy" in an e-mail to Vogue.

"She is unlike anyone who has come before her, and while she is a much stronger actress in every way, there is a tiny bit of Marilyn Monroe in her zaftig humidity," he wrote.

The Johansson-Allen attraction is purely professional, she said, telling told Vogue she works to keep her romantic life private.

But Johansson said reports last month that she and singer Justin Timberlake were an item were "not true" and when asked about "Black Dahlia" co-star Josh Hartnett, she offered, "I'd rather not comment on my personal life in that way."

Johansson's next film, "The Nanny Diaries," opens April 20.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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More sex charges filed against designer

LOS ANGELES (UPI) -- Los Angeles prosecutors filed additional felony charges against Indian designer Anand Jon as four more women leveled charges of sexual assault.

Prosecutors charged Jon, 33, with another 15 felonies and five misdemeanor counts involving the additional four alleged sexual assault victims, including a 17-year-old, The Los Angeles Times said Tuesday.

The fashion designer was in Los Angeles to unveil a new line during L.A. Fashion Week when he was originally charged earlier this month.

"He lured these girls to be models and once here sexually assaulted them," Jane Robison, a Los Angeles County district attorney's office spokeswoman said when the new charges were filed Monday. "This is an ongoing investigation and we believe there may be numerous additional victims."

New York authorities also are investigating into whether Jon assaulted women there, Robison said.

Jon was charged March 13 with seven counts, including forcible rape, lewd acts upon a child, contributing to the delinquency of a minor, sexual battery by restraint and attempted forcible oral copulation. Those charges involved three alleged victims, including a 15-year-old.

Jon's attorney, Ronald Richards, said women sought to exploit their relationship with his client because of his celebrity status.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Nothing on TV with 104 channels? Oh, sure

NEW YORK (UPI) -- The average U.S. household gets 104 television channels but the average TV viewer watches a paltry 16, a Nielsen Media Research survey showed.

Those figures are up from an average of 96 channels per home in 2005, when about 15 of them were watched with any degree of regularity, the New York Daily News said Tuesday.

An estimated 47 percent of all U.S. homes with televisions had more than 100 channels, according to the New York researcher.

But as the number of channels increased over the last three years, the number of channels watched remained in the 15-to-16 range, meaning more options didn't necessarily translate into more channels being watched, researchers said.

For comparison, in 1985, the average home got about 19 channels, although Nielsen did not provide a figure on how many channels were watched.

Nielsen estimates about 111.4 million homes have television sets in the United States with each having an average of three sets.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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City hopes to keep 'Lights' burning

AUSTIN, Texas (UPI) -- The city of Austin, Texas, hoping to pick up a fresh set of downs, is prepared to offer NBC incentives to keep filming "Friday Night Lights" in Texas.

A City Council proposal on Thursday's agenda would give NBC Universal Inc. about $40,000 for each of the two seasons the show is filmed in the Austin area -- but only after the network picks it up for a second season, the Austin (Texas) American-Statesman said Tuesday. The deal could be extended if filming continues for subsequent seasons.

Other states, such as Louisiana and New Mexico, are offering financial incentives as well. City economic development officials said they are in negotiations and could not comment.

Austin Mayor Will Wynn said the offer, while modest, sends the message "to NBC and 'Friday Night Lights' that we really, really like them being here."

Wynn said the city is lobbying the Legislature to create a state fund that could be used as incentives for films, TV series and commercials.

NBC is expected to announce its fall schedule in mid-May.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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The Hollywood Exclusive

By Marilyn Beck and Stacy Jenel Smith

Penn Jillette Criticizes Sacha Baron Cohen, Michael Moore/Jennifer Lopez' Costar Claims Its All About The Work On Set

Illusionist/debunker/host Penn Jillette takes aim at Sacha Baron Cohen and Michael Moore, scoffing the notion of their respective movies as representing reality. "Michael Moore and Sacha Baron Cohen are doing the same thing -- taking snippets of edited film and using it to make their case, not getting real information about real people. They're trying to create comedy by editing," declares Jillette, whose fifth season of "Penn & Teller Bull*#@!" gets underway tomorrow night (3/22) on Showtime.

"We have video of people stuttering and picking their nose. We don't use it. We have things that are really, really funny that we don't keep because they don't represent the real person. We have a saying: 'We can't go Michael Moore on that,'" says Jillette, speaking of himself and partner Teller.

Furthermore, "Sacha has to conceal what he's doing. We don't hide what we do. We tell people we disagree with them. We're fair and extremely biased."

In fact, he wishes the media would return to what he perceives as its style of bygone days, "when newspapers would tell you what they were -- The Kansas Democrat -- instead of pretending to be non-biased. Why not get on television and say, 'I'm Bill Davis, I hate George Bush, and here's the news ... '?"

Jillette's scoring with two series right now, as his NBC "Identity" Friday night game show won its timeslot in its return to the lineup last week. He makes it clear he's as fired up as ever over "Bull*#@!" because "We're getting really good at it."

This season they're taking on topics including Wal-Mart haters, nuclear power, immigration and breasts. The latter installment ranges from the Janet Jackson Super Bowl debacle to "the whole Top-Free Movement," notes Jillette. "And then, of course, there are the breastfeeding mothers who've been busted, so to speak."

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FROM THE INSIDE LOOKING OUT: Jennifer Lopez has developed quite a reputation for demanding and domineering ways, but Manny Perez, who costars in the upcoming "El Cantante" feature with Lopez and hubby Marc Anthony, insists it's all about the work when she's acting. "You always read in the media about Jennifer Lopez, so you assume you're going to be dealing with a diva, but she's not at all. They're both so down-to-earth," claims Perez about the couple who play King of Salsa Hector Lavoe and his wife, Puchi, in the feature.

Despite rumblings of trouble between Lopez and Anthony, Perez says they brought an affectionate attitude to the set -- on and off camera. "It was fun to see them work off each other. There's definitely a lot of chemistry ... I think with them being married to each other, they brought all of that to the actual set."

To hear Perez tell it, Lopez also shows off the kind of impressive acting chops that first got her attention in the movie, too. "On my first day, we had this intense scene with Marc, Jennifer and me where Jennifer has to break down, coming in screaming and hollering. We met prior to this and talked about the character, but that was it," recalls the actor, who says Lopez nailed the demanding sequence.

Perez, who also has the movies "Bella" and "Where God Left His Shoes" on the way, plays Lavoe's best friend/manager in "El Cantante." "He's a combination of like five friends of Hector's, who were always around asking for something. It's a very complex character, which I love," notes Perez, who met several of Lavoe's real-life friends in preparation for the part. The movie, which is currently in the festival circuit, hits theaters this summer.

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A REAL FAMILY AFFAIR: "October Road" regular Brad William Henke is hoping to be behind the cameras by May. "I'm going to direct a film my wife, actress Katelin Chesna, and I wrote called 'Stuck,'" says Henke, adding the film "is loosely based on my wife's life. She's someone who grew up in a family where they weren't cared for or loved, so they learned to not care for and love themselves. Then a love comes into her life, and she has to try to make the change and be a good person."

Henke, who plays Owen Rowan in ABC's "October Road" drama, is also featured in the upcoming indie feature "One Way To Valhalla" with Gabriel Macht and Kate Walsh from "Grey's Anatomy." "It's a unique comedy that's done in a serious way. Macht plays this gearhead guy who gets hit in the head and decides to change who he is. I play his best friend," he says. "The rest of us freak out because he's the center of our lives ... so his getting hit in the head creates a paradigm shift in all our lives."

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THE BIG SCREEN SCENE: With the Tim Robbins-Rachel McAdams-Michael Pena "The Return" heading toward a May 7 production start, casting for subsidiary roles is underway on the feature that follows three soldiers on an unplanned road trip across the United States after they come back from Iraq. Among those are Robbins' character's teenage son and the parents of McAdams' boyfriend, who's died in the war. The story also has Robbins' character's wife, who asks him for a divorce upon his return. Suffice it to say things aren't easy for the soldiers who are coming home.

 

 

OTTAWA (UPI) -- Recent blockbuster mergers in the Canadian film, television and radio business will be the focus of the country's industry regulators.

The Canadian entertainment industry witnessed a number of major takeovers with CTVglobemedia acquiring rival broadcaster Chum, CanWest Global picking up broadcaster Alliance Atlantis and Astral Media buying Standard Radio.

The Canadian Radio-Television and Telecommunications Commission public hearings will be scheduled this fall, Variety said.

"The current wave of consolidation in the Canadian broadcasting industry and the possibility of more major transactions in the future, raises important questions relating to the diversity of voices in Canada," CRTC chairman Konrad von Finckenstein said.

Conducting a public hearing in the fall would allow the commission to study the issues and develop "clearly articulated policy guidelines that will further the evolution of the Canadian broadcasting system," von Finckenstein said.

Public hearings on the three mergers will be governed by existing ownership policies.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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MySpace launches elections portal

LOS ANGELES (UPI) -- MySpace users who want to register to vote or learn the latest on the 2008 U.S. elections can visit Impact Channel, a political community on the network.

The portal is designed to connect politicians, non-profits and civic organizations with users around the world, MySpace said in a news release. The Impact Channel will contain a voter registration tool, links to official candidate profiles, Impact-related event and job listings, videos and programs.

"By empowering our users with easy-to-find information, offered in a way they can relate to it, Impact will ignite their involvement in the political process," said Chris DeWolfe, chief executive officer of MySpace.

Modeled after existing channels such as MySpace Music and Video, the new channel will enable the community to learn about the candidates, experience the political process online and offline and learn more about issues and organizations.

As part of the Impact launch, 10 presidential candidates, five Republicans and five Democrats, posted their official MySpace profiles.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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MTV integrates series with online gaming

NEW YORK (UPI) -- New York's MTV Networks is integrating its television series with a new online gaming platform to draw in more young viewers and entice more advertisers.

The network recently launched "Daily Rage!" at dailyrage.mtv.com where players embark on scavenger hunts designed to mirror MTV's primetime series such as "My Super Sweet 16," Hollywood Reporter said Monday. Players seek hidden icons that win them cash and merchandise prizes.

"It's not just about advertising on the show with a commercial or a banner ad online," said David Gale, MTV's executive vice president for new media and specialty film content. "It allows us another place to experience brands for the audience and to keep them engaged for a pretty long period of time in this space."

Gale said MTV is developing a range of entertainment that "crosses media, platforms and has all different shapes and forms, some with game aspects or more traditional storytelling with serialized content."


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Spector trial jury selection begins

LOS ANGELES (UPI) -- A pool of 300 prospective jurors gathered in the Los Angeles courthouse Monday, as jury selection began in the murder trial of music producer Phil Spector.

Spector is charged with murder in the death of actress Lana Clarkson, who was fatally shot in his Los Angeles-area mansion.

Opening arguments are expected to begin April 30 for the trial that could last up to three months, The Los Angeles Times said.

The trial will be televised, making it the first televised Los Angeles criminal proceeding since the O.J. Simpson murder trial in 1995.

Spector pleaded not guilty in the shooting and has been free on $1 million bail since his February 2003 arrest in the death of the 40-year-old Clarkson, who starred in low-budget films, including "Barbarian Queen" and "Amazon Women on the Moon," and had minor television roles.

Spector has given conflicting statements about what happened after Clarkson joined him at his home for a drink, documents showed. Spector has made conflicting statements about events, first telling police he accidentally shot her, then saying Clarkson took a revolver from him and committed suicide.

If convicted, Spector faces up to life in prison.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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The Hollywood Exclusive

By Marilyn Beck and Stacy Jenel Smith

George Lopez Setting Sites on Big Screen 'Richest Man/Daryn Kagan's Reinvention Moving Right Along

Now that "The George Lopez Show" has wrapped for the season, the comic-cum-actor-producer-director says he'll be concentrating on the big screen.

"I have a movie at Universal called 'The Richest Man in the World,'" says Lopez. "I'm trying to get Universal to finally buy it. The script is very good. I helped write it with a couple of guys. That one would be important to get done." He describes the film as a cross between the classic 1970 Godfrey Cambridge starrer, "Watermelon Man," and Warren Beatty's Oscar-winning 1978 comedy, "Heaven Can Wait." "It's about a Latino guy who's envious of what is considered fame and success, then he becomes that guy and realizes it isn't what it's all about. None of it is real, and he chooses. ... It's not even the simplicity, but the comfort and love of a life that's simple as opposed to a life of high fortune with no redeeming value to it."

Lopez says he believes he escaped fame's increasingly more rapacious clutches because he didn't achieve his level of renown earlier in life. "I think I'm old enough to not really kind of buy it," he says. " It's funny, in the beginning, like say 20 years ago, I would say, 'Can you imagine walking into a restaurant and having everybody know you?' But now it's about keeping the show on the air and making that important to us, the people who watch it, and the kids. I care about my work." He adds, "I've been fortunate in success over the last six years, and I have a lot of opulence in my life, but I know that what's real is driving my daughter to school. That's the richness of the story."

Meanwhile, Lopez reports he'll be popping up on "Reno:911" as "the governor. I'm going to tape like four speeches, and I'll show up throughout the season." He adds, "I think I'm like a rogue governor ... I may do Arnold Schwarzenegger with such a heavy accent they might not be sure who I'm playing."

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ON THE POSITIVE SIDE: "It's never felt scary. It felt scarier to stay in news." So says Daryn Kagan, who since November has been devoting her time, energy and talent to reporting stories that show the best of the human spirit via her DarynKagan.com website. "I had a great, great run at CNN. I'm sure I could have gone to Fox or somewhere else and knocked on the door, but in three years I would have been in the same position," says the former anchor. "At some point, I realized, I'd need to reinvent myself."

Now, she reports, her site is building a larger and larger audience, bigger advertisers are coming aboard, and she is continuously finding new ways to extend her brand in both the new and old media worlds. More visitors are contributing stories themselves, or sending Kagan story tips. And the indefatigable Kagan is penning a book, "What's Possible," which will be a combination of "stories you get on the website and also my story -- the back story of creating the site." She wants readers to know, "At some point, your reinvention time will come. Don't worry, it's going to be great. It's the beginning of a new world you get to create. Everyone faces changes -- in their jobs, marriages, children growing up. You can be overwhelmed, or take charge and use the opportunity."

She also has a PBS documentary in the making, "Breaking the Curse," about an Atlanta housewife who has become a leading advocate for people afflicted with leprosy in India. "It's a classic DarynKagan.com kind of story," says Daryn.

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PART WITH MUSCLE: The man behind the buff body of Sylvester Stallone, trainer Gunnar Peterson, snagged a role in Sly's movie "Rocky Balboa," hitting DVD today (3/20), but the personal trainer to the stars tells us he rarely likes to be in the spotlight. "It sounds funny to call it perks, but that's really all it is," claims Gunnar, who's trained Stallone for more than five years, of his role as Rocky's trainer. "I try not to go on set. I try not to go to premieres. I do what I do, and if things come my way, great, but to try to shine in somebody else's light is not very smart. The last thing I need is to look like I'm trying to rub shoulders to do stuff," says Gunnar, who also has trained the likes of Jennifer Lopez, Ben Affleck, Bruce Willis, and Avril Lavigne.

Now Gunnar's got everyone wanting to look like Stallone, who's in top form at age 60. "He keeps raising the bar for a lot of people," Peterson points out. "He comes in the gym with just as much energy as anybody. It goes to show that 60 is just a number."

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TOUGH ROLE TO FILL: A casting notice has gone out for "Anna Nicole"-- as in the late blond bombshell, for a movie about her life to start shooting early next month, by filmmaker brothers Jack and Joseph Nasser. They did last year's "The Amber Alert Story" for Lifetime.

 

ST. PAUL, Minn. (UPI) -- Pop singer Christina Aguilera, who takes her current tour to Minnesota Monday, says she likes the feel of her all female-dominated show.

Warming up the crowd at the Xcel Energy Center in St. Paul, Minn., will be the girl groups Pussycat Dolls and Danity Kane.

"It's nice to have an all-female, girl-empowered kind of show," Aguilera told the (Minneapolis) Star Tribune. I'm happy that we all are able to do it together and be in support of other women."

Aguilera says there are too many people trying to "instigate catfights."

"Trust, me, I'm not a stranger to being the victim of that in the press," said the 26-year-old entertainer, whose latest CD is "Back to Basics."

"At this point, why any drama at all? Let's team together and really give them something to talk about."


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Smith 'boyfriend' Birkhead fires attorney

NASSAU, Bahamas (UPI) -- Anna Nicole Smith's ex-boyfriend Larry Birkhead, the California photographer who claims he's the father of Smith's baby, has fired his attorney, Debra Opri.

"Larry Birkhead and I have terminated our attorney-client relationship effective immediately," Opri said in a statement. "I wish Larry the very best of luck in his continuing efforts to prove that he is Dannielynn's biological father. My prayers will be with Larry and Dannielynn always."

Opri represented Birkhead in paternity and custody matters, Fox News said Friday.

Also claiming paternity is Howard K. Stern, Smith's companion listed as the child's father on the birth certificate.

Birkhead, in the Bahamas preparing for Friday's custody hearing over the five-month-old girl, told "Access Hollywood" that he plans to go in a different direction and has "complete confidence in my attorney, Emerick Knowles, who's handling the Bahamas portion of my case."

The hearing in Nassau is unrelated to the California paternity suit, Birkhead said, "and there was no reason for a statement to be released just hours before my appearance in a Bahamas court."

The relationship between Birkhead and Opri reportedly was strained for several weeks.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Church wants Elton John concert canceled

PORT-OF-SPAIN, Trinidad and Tobago (UPI) -- Church leaders in Tobago are seeking to bar singer Elton John from performing at a festival on the island in April because the British star is openly gay.

John is scheduled to headline the Plymouth Jazz Festival, along with Diana Ross, Mary J. Blige and Earth, Wind & Fire, but conservative groups on the island, where homosexuality is widely condemned, are calling for him be banned from performing, the Times of London said Friday.

The Venerable Philip Isaac, archdeacon for Trinidad and Tobago, said John's lifestyle does not conform to "biblical teachings."

"He needs to be ministered unto," Isaac said. "His visit to the island can open the country to be tempted towards pursuing his lifestyle."

It is thought to be the first time that John's sexuality has led to a campaign against his performing.

Festival executive Anthony Maharaj said the singer's performance and his private live should be mutually exclusive, adding that John's concert would proceed even if church groups protest outside the event, the Independent said.

"Elton John is coming as what he is, one of the world greatest performers," Maharaj said. "He is not coming here to preach about what lifestyle people should have."


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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R-rated movies to have parental guideline

LAS VEGAS (UPI) -- Just because youngsters can see an R-rated movie with an adult doesn't mean they should, the two organizations that operate the U.S. movie rating system said.

The National Association of Theatre Owners and the Motion Picture Association of America, wanting to dissuade parents and adult guardians from bringing smaller children to violent and sexually graphic movies, have developed a new advisory on the appropriateness of younger patrons attending R-rated movies, the Hollywood Reporter said.

The new advisory will read: "Generally, it is not appropriate for parents to bring their young children with them to R-rated motion pictures."

The additional language is in response to complaints from movie-goers. A modification of the ratings system is under way.

Members of NATO and the MPAA introduced the changes in Las Vegas during the ShoWest convention, telling listeners that the voluntary ratings sy stem is in place to inform parents of a movie's content.

"Our sole purpose is not to be a prescriptive body but a descriptive body," said Kendrick MacDowell, NATO general counsel.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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The Hollywood Exclusive

By Marilyn Beck and Stacy Jenel Smith

Foxworthy Takes Exception to 'Dumbing Down' Claim/Paulina Porizkova's 'Dancing with The Stars' Just for Fun

Jeff Foxworthy takes exception to claims in the Washington Post and Los Angeles Times that "Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader" is a flagrant example of the dumbing down of today's quiz shows.

"I only get about 40 percent of the questions right -- and I notice that's about average," says the comic who's serving as host of Fox's new ratings sensation. "In my case, it helps if there's a question I've covered helping my kids with their homework, but otherwise, well, I learned calculus at Georgia Tech, but I'll tell you, if I were a contestant on the show, I wouldn't be going home with much money." Money is one thing the high-grossing comedian doesn't have to worry about.

As for what he'll be doing next, he reports that the fledgling game show, in which contestants are asked to answer questions that come from 5th graders' texts, has been picked up for an additional 13 episodes that will be shot around his daughters' spring break schedules from school.

"The people at Fox were real nice about it," says Jeff, who lives with his wife and two teenage daughters in Atlanta, Ga., and resists any work that will keep him away from his family for more than a few days. "We'll tape half the new segments -- we can do two or three a day -- in late March, then we'll break, and I'll vacation with the family in Puerto Rico -- and then I'll fly back to L.A. for the show."

And then he'll be finishing up his two latest books. He's writing the children's book "Dirt on My Shirt," for publication next year, and he's got the third volume of his "Redneck Dictionary" scheduled to hit shops this fall. The first two "Rednecks," he reminds, "were on the New York Times best seller list -- and there's likely someone spinning in his grave over that."

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THE VIDEOLAND VIEW: Gorgeous former supermodel and actress Paulina Porizkova is among the names getting ready to test their terpsichorean mettle tonight (3/19) in the new season of "Dancing With the Stars" -- the hit show that's put a fresh charge into the careers of such alumni as Mario Lopez and Lisa Rinna. She's not holding out hope, however, that it'll revive her flagging acting career.

"The last movie I did was three or four years ago," says Porizkova, who's been featured in such films as "Female Perversions" and "Her Alibi." "Since then I called my agent and said, 'Forget it!' At some point I have to face the fact I am now officially too old to try to be an actress."

The 41-year-old Czech native, who's married to former The Cars' frontman, Ric Ocasek and has two boys, adds, "I've done 14-15 films, and I am at the point where I'm really sick of being rejected. It was always something -- 'You're too young, too pretty, too thin, too foreign ... ' It was really great for my ego when I thought I was a big model because it kept me humble. But at some point I got so humble there was no further down to go. I thought, 'I need to climb out of this hole and think of myself in a positive manner.'" She adds, however, "If one of my favorite shows called, I would be more than happy to do it, but I'm not hungry for it anymore."

Porizkova says her only motivation for doing "Dancing with the Stars" is this girl just wants to have fun. "I'm an avid fan and have watched it from show one," says Porizkova, adding she just wishes she'd been able to get in shape before she got the call to join the competition. "I have no dance training. I'm not athletic, never have been. I don't exercise on a regular basis. But I think my strongest attribute is my enthusiasm to humiliate myself on public TV. Somebody needs to be bad on the show, and I'll be happy to provide that -- with enthusiasm!"

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THE BIG SCREEN SCENE: Mark Wahlberg, who has "Shooter" opening Friday (3/23) with Danny Glover and hot newcomer Kate Mara, reports that the actors had to cozy up fast when shooting a pivotal scene atop a frozen glacier for five days: "We had to take a helicopter up, and if there were clouds, the temperature would drop to 30 degrees." According to him, "We had one little tent to house camera equipment, and no trailers, so we would all snuggle in there in between takes because we had nowhere else to go. Once the clouds rolled in, the helicopters couldn't reach us, and we'd get stuck up there, or have to hike down." Makes for a close-knit cast.

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NEW DIMENSION: Ron Perlman is getting ready to try his hand at directing, with "Wooden Lake," a dramatic feature film. "That's the first thing I'm going to do after I finish 'Hellboy 2: The Golden Army," he reveals. Perlman -- whose animated "Hellboy: Blood and Iron" show just debuted on Cartoon Network's Toonami -- tells us "Wooden Lake" is nothing like the Guillermo del Toro comic book adaptation for which he's become known. "It's a very simple, human, elegant piece of writing that will not require the same kind of pyrotechnics Guillermo will bring to 'Hellboy 2.'"

 

DEAR STACY: An update, please, on George Carlin. Haven't seen him in a while. Age? Upcoming activities? -- Jeff M., Cleveland

DEAR JEFF: The revered and reviled comedy master has had to deal with heart failure and breathing problems in recent times, something he talked about on stage last December, adding that he'd been hospitalized twice this past fall. He's reportedly suffered three heart attacks through the years. He lost his beloved wife, Brenda, to liver cancer almost a decade ago now. Still, he's kept a full agenda of activities, including voice work (recently in the animated "Cars" and "Happily N'Ever After"), movie and TV appearances. He's reportedly planning a new special for next year. Carlin, 69, also recently performed at the U.S. Festival of Comedy Arts in Aspen, Colo. and keeps up a busy tour schedule. Check out his www.georgecarlin.com website calendar for dates.

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DEAR STACY: I am a big fan of the old Soupy Sales shows. Are they available on DVD? Also, was there a naked woman behind the door Soupy always opened, as the legend says, and did he really get a lot of "green pieces of paper" he asked for? -- Peter G., Yonkers, N.Y.

DEAR PETER: Two Soupy DVD collections came out last year: "Soupy Sales: In Living Black & White" and "Soupy Sales Collection: The Whole Gang is Here!" The former is a nice representation of his early '60s kids' show material, while the latter consists of '70s Soupy stuff, and a version of the Naked Lady prank is in it. The famous original version -- when Sales' practical-joke-loving stagehands had a nude woman awaiting him behind the door he'd open daily as a comedy bit -- was done on his live show out of Detroit in the late 1950s and can only be imagined today. The later version, after his show was picked up by ABC and was being done on tape, has been included on a number of bloopers specials. The "funny green pieces of paper" bit, in which he urged kiddies to remove money from their sleeping parents' wallets and purses and send them to him on New Year's Day, 1965, is true, according to Sales' autobiography, "Soupy Sez! My Life and Zany Times." He was miffed at having to work the holiday. He got suspended for two weeks.

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DEAR STACY: What's become of Alex Kingston of "ER"? Haven't seen her in quite a while. -- Lori P., Cleveland

DEAR LORI: Featured in the recent big screen "Alpha Dog," Kingston has the indie drama "Crashing" awaiting distribution. It was screened at January's Slamdance Festival. Last year, she trod the boards with Christian Slater in a production of "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" in London. Wed to German writer Florian Haertel, she is the mother of one daughter, Salome, who celebrates her 6th birthday March 28.

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DEAR STACY: I'd like to know the name of the star who plays Dr. Alfred Rivera on "Watch Over Me" on MyNetwork TV and about his acting career. -- Pat D., Flushing, N.Y.

DEAR PAT: Tony Castillo hails from Chicago, where he decided that after 13 years in sales, he just had to pursue his passion for acting and enrolled as a theater and industrial psychology major at Northwestern University. After graduating, he studied with famed Windy City acting coach Ted Liss and began working on stage. As a member of The Opera Factory, which staged Spanish Zarsuelas (mini-operas), he starred in a number of productions in Chicago and on tour. Of Cuban and Mexican extraction, Castillo, who is married and refers to himself as a proud parent, now divides his time between Chicago and L.A. He has a long list of other credits including the telepic "Good Night, Sweet Wife," episodic work on shows such as "Walker, Texas Ranger," and the 2005 indie feature "Lana's Rain."

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DEAR STACY: I would like to know if the guy who played Finn on "Girlfriends" is really in a band. -- T.R., Queensbridge, N.Y.

DEAR T.R.: That's recording star and sometimes actor Tricky you've seen on the sitcom. Born Adrian Thaws into a multi-ethnic family in Bristol, England, in 1968, he never knew his father, and his mother committed suicide when he was 4 years old. He named his first album "Maxinquaye" (Maxine Quaye) after her, and has said he feels like she is speaking through him. He's also been seen on "The L Word," "CSI: Crime Scene Investigation," and on the big screen in films including "The Fifth Element" -- but is best known for his six albums and long list of musical collaborations.

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DEAR STACY: When the finale of "American Inventor" was on last year, they said there would be a second season. What is happening? -- Rich G., San Antonio, Texas

DEAR RICH: Casting is just getting started for season two. In fact, according to the show's website, casting calls will be held in the following six cities: Los Angeles -- tomorrow (3/19); San Francisco -- March 25; Chicago -- March 31; New York City -- April 4; Orlando -- April 9; and Houston -- April 13. Applications and more info can be found on www.americaninventor.tv.

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DEAR STACY: Hope you can help me remember the name of the person who sang a song called "Mr. Paganini." -- Mrs. Irene F., Ozone Park, N.Y.

DEAR IRENE: "You'll Have To Swing It (Mr. Paganini)" is identified with the great Ella Fitzgerald, who also wrote the lyrics.

=========

SEND YOUR QUESTIONS to Stacy Jenel Smith at Creators Syndicate, 5777 W. Century Blvd., Suite 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045. Due to the large volume of mail, personal replies cannot be given. To find out more about Marilyn Beck and Stacy Jenel Smith and read their past columns, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

 

"Wild Hogs" (PG-13, 1 hr., 40 min.)

If it weren't for a painfully slow start and a script riddled with crude language and sexual innuendo, much of it homophobic, "Wild Hogs" would have the makings of a popcorn-worthy family flick. Instead, it starts out dull and aimless, and when it finally does come together, nearly half-an-hour in, as an amusing if mindless romp about four middle-aged guys on a cross-country motorcycle trip, it is too lewd for audiences younger than high-school age. And even high-schoolers may be put off by a story about guys in midlife crisis looking like poseurs on their Harley hogs. The film also contains gross toilet humor, considerable midrange profanity, a skinny-dipping scene in which we see one character naked from the back, jokes about condoms and a prolonged subplot about a gay state trooper nearly stalking the guys. There is a comical free-for-all fight scene and some characters drink and smoke.

Staid Doug (Tim Allen), arrogant Woody (John Travolta), henpecked Bobby (Martin Lawrence) and shy bachelor Dudley (William H. Macy) ride their bikes on weekends, but now Woody, secretly bankrupt, decides they need a bigger adventure. He talks his pals into tossing their cell phones and taking off. Along the way, they attract a gay state trooper (John C. McGinley) and anger a real motorcycle gang in New Mexico (led by a tattooed Ray Liotta, spoofing his tough-guy filmography). They face their foes in a little town and Dudley finds love (with Marisa Tomei).

"Zodiac" (R, 2 hrs., 38 min.)

Its air heavy with cigarette smoke and 1970s newsroom and cop shop atmosphere, "Zodiac" will hold audiences tightly in its grasp as driven detectives and hungry reporters try to suss out the identity of the Zodiac serial killer who terrorized the San Francisco Bay Area for years with random murders and frustrating clues and misdirection in handwritten letters. Despite the movie's excessive length, mature-for-their-age film buffs 16 and older should find "Zodiac" riveting as a fact-based crime saga, rich as a character study, and impressively naturalistic as an exercise in style -- director David Fincher's nod to 1940s filmmaking. Though the movie depicts several of Zodiac's crimes, the moments are, compared to many R-rated films, relatively understated. Still, they include point-blank shootings, stabbings, spattered blood and, in the moments before the attacks, petrified victims. An infant and mother are also shown at risk. One character uses drugs and several drink and smoke. Cops discuss in nongraphic terms a suspect's past molestation of children and we see a sex toy he owns. The script contains some strong profanity.

The cast, based on real people, clicks right down to the walk-ons. Jake Gyllenhaal plays Robert Graysmith, a young editorial cartoonist at the San Francisco Chronicle in 1969, when the Zodiac killer first blipped on the police and public radar. (The film is based on Graysmith's books about Zodiac.) Graysmith, along with hopelessly dissolute crime reporter Paul Avery (Robert Downey Jr.) and homicide detective David Toschi (Mark Ruffalo), becomes obsessed to the point of distraction with finding the Zodiac killer. The case, this movie contends, damages all their lives.

P.S. FOR FILM BUFFS 16 AND OLDER: One of the most brilliant crime films ever made was "M" (1931), an early talkie made in pre-Nazi Germany about cops and gangsters cooperating to track down a child killer. Try to get a copy with subtitles, not with dialogue dubbed into English. Hearing the real actors is always better. The killer is played by the great Peter Lorre at the start of his career, which soon took him to Hollywood. Also see him in the classic Hollywood crime drama, "The Maltese Falcon" (1941).

"Black Snake Moan" (R, 1 hr., 56 min.)

Writer/director Craig Brewer's bizarre "Black Snake Moan" is a lurid Southern gothic tale that looks like an old pulp fiction magazine cover and sounds like the prose inside. It is not for high-schoolers under 17. A sexually ravenous (and pathologically promiscuous) young white woman named Rae (Christina Ricci), damaged by a childhood of molestation, is temporarily shanghaied by a grizzled, Bible-toting black farmer called Lazarus (Samuel L. Jackson), recently abandoned by his wife. He decides to cure Rae of her "wickedness." The film may be set in the present, but it has incredibly retro attitudes about women. It displays Rae in bikini briefs and braless, midriff-baring tops, often chained by Lazarus to his radiator so she won't wander off. The two do not have a sexual relationship (though their scenes are sexually charged), but there are numerous explicit sexual situations (including a scene in which Rae seduces a boy nearer 14 than 18, though their coupling remains off-screen), suggestive dancing, toplessness, strong profanity, crude, misogynistic sexual slang and racial slurs. Characters drink, smoke, use drugs, fight and brandish guns.

The movie's two saving graces are a neat blues soundtrack (Lazarus plays guitar and sings) and the hugely talented, but often insufficiently challenged, Jackson, chomping into a meaty role. Justin Timberlake is good, too, as Rae's troubled boyfriend, whose departure for National Guard duty sets her on a sex, booze and drugs binge that gets her beaten up, left for dead, then "rescued" by Lazarus. Ricci shows acting bravery as Rae, but her work is very forced, even for this film.

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Beyond the Ratings Game: Movie Reviews for various ages

-- 8 AND OLDER:

"Bridge to Terabithia" PG (Touching story (based on Katherine Paterson's 1977 novel) about a deep friendship between fifth-graders Jess (Josh Hutcherson), a budding artist from a rural family that largely ignores him, and Leslie (AnnaSophia Robb), a free-spirited daughter of wealthy writers; the two create their own fantasy world, Terabithia, in the woods, facing down bullies there and in the real world; film's gritty naturalism is marred by a charmless, computer-animated effort to visualize Terabithia. Under-8s may be spooked by swooping, furry vultures, giant trolls, armored attack squirrels, and a huge tree that turns into a troll (pretty cool, actually) in Terabithia; adults use mild profanity; kid-scuffles with bloodied noses; verbal references to a girl whose dad hits her; kids discuss religion; WARNING -- PLOT GIVEAWAY: Central theme in film's last act deals with grief and loss.)

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-- 10 AND OLDER:

"The Astronaut Farmer" PG (Disappointing family film -- oddly inert, narratively disjointed, emotionally flat -- about a one-time astronaut named Farmer (Billy Bob Thornton) who left the space program before ever getting to leave the Earth; now a Texas rancher, he is determined to go up on his own and has built a rocket and space capsule in his barn; his wife (Virginia Madsen) supports his dream, but doesn't know they're nearly bankrupt; the FBI takes note after he buys high-grade fuel; they send an old astronaut buddy (Bruce Willis) to stop him with logic, then threats; he responds a bit like a survivalist or conspiracy-smelling crank. Occasional profanity, crude language; sexual innuendo; accident injuries; themes about suicide, depression; grandparent dies; marital argument; beer.)

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-- PG-13s AND A PG FOR HIGH-SCHOOLERS:

"Wild Hogs" (NEW) (Slow to start, but ultimately amusing comedy about four middle-aged Cincinnati guys (Tim Allen, John Travolta, Martin Lawrence and William H. Macy) who toss their cell phones and go on a cross-country motorcycle trip; in New Mexico they face a "real" motorcycle gang (led by Ray Liotta) and prove themselves. Too lewd to be a total family comedy; crude language; sexual innuendo -- much of it homophobic; gross toilet humor; considerable midrange profanity; a skinny-dipping scene with a character naked from behind; condom joke; prolonged subplot about a gay state trooper (John C. McGinley) who nearly stalks the guys; free-for-all fight; drinking, smoking. OK for high-schoolers.)

"Ghost Rider" (Glitzy, energized, if nonsensical fable (based on the Marvel comic) about stunt motorcyclist, Johnny Blaze (Nicolas Cage), who as a teen, sold his soul to Mephistopheles (Peter Fonda) to save his dad from cancer; as an adult he tries to be good -- doesn't drink, listens to the Carpenters, rekindles a romance with his teen sweetheart, now a TV reporter (Eva Mendes) -- in hopes of negating his devilish deal; but the devil wants Johnny as his bounty hunter, chasing after the rogue demon Blackheart (Wes Bentley) and his pals; at night Johnny is the Ghost Rider, ablaze on a superbike, trying to stop ordinary evil as well as Blackheart; a mysterious church caretaker (Sam Elliott) helps him. Fights; skull-faced demons; middling profanity; smoking; drinking; mild sexual innuendo.)

"Breach" (Utterly gripping film meticulously recounts how the FBI in 2001 snared Robert Hanssen (Chris Cooper), a traitorous agent who, for more than 20 years, had been selling secrets to the Soviet Union, then Russia, under the noses of his FBI colleagues; Ryan Phillippe as agent-in-training Eric O'Neill, chosen to be Hanssen's clerk and keep him in the dark while a huge team (Laura Linney as a key agent) plots to catch Hanssen in the act. Steamy, though nonexplicit bedroom scenes; nongraphic references to Hanssen's sexual habits: videotaping "rough" sex with his wife, talk of his relationship with a stripper; crude sexual language; fairly strong profanity. More for high-schoolers.)

"Tyler Perry's Daddy's Little Girls" (Preachy, broadly played, mildly entertaining comic melodrama about a good-hearted inner-city man (impressive Idris Elba) who served time for a rape he didn't commit and now works as a garage mechanic and chauffeur, trying to raise three daughters and keep them away from their gang-and-drug-involved mom (Tasha Smith); when she gets a judge to place the kids with her for their "safety," he asks a hotshot woman lawyer (always excellent Gabrielle Union) he has been chauffeuring to help; she is too snooty to respect such a humble man and finds his family troubles distasteful, but eventually she sees the light. Passionate, nongraphic sexual innuendo; drug theme; mild violence, threats; rare profanity; drinking. High-schoolers.)

"Music and Lyrics" (Smart, hilarious, humane, wonderfully performed and visualized romantic comedy about a washed-up former '80s pop star (Hugh Grant, in fine form) who teams with a ditzy former writing student (ebullient Drew Barrymore) to create a new anthem for a teen music icon (Haley Bennett); the pair's insecurities and eventual romantic involvement thicken the plot -- though not much; riotous spoofs of past and present pop music and music videos. Implied overnight tryst with kissing, morning-after snuggle; sexually suggestive dancing; occasional mild profanity; verbal references to drugs; comic description of a music video looking like an "orgasm set to the 'Gandhi' soundtrack.")

"Norbit" (Crass, crude, politically incorrect but often funny farce celebrates Eddie Murphy's gift for bringing wildly diverse characters to life through pounds of makeup; Norbit (Murphy), a milquetoast married to big, mean Rasputia (also Murphy), gains the gumption to stand up to her and her thuggish family after his lovely childhood pal (Thandie Newton) comes to town. Much sexual innuendo, including unkind views of Rasputia in a bikini, the tub, in bed; all outfits outlining anatomically correct breasts; nongraphic jokes refer to bedroom antics, the size of a little boy's penis, pimps (comics Eddie Griffin and Katt Williams), prostitutes, condoms; threats of violence; lots of rhymes-with-witch and the S-word; sexual language; ethnic stereotyping; Rasputia purposely drives over a dog; we later see the pooch wearing wheels to get around; she chases kids, yelling, "Don't think I won't kill a child"; flatulence jokes. Iffy for middle-schoolers.)

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-- R's:

"Zodiac" (NEW) (Long but riveting, satisfyingly naturalistic fact-based crime saga about search for San Francisco Bay Area's random, frightening Zodiac killer in 1969 and for many years after, focusing on a homicide detective (Mark Ruffalo), a newspaper cartoonist (Jake Gyllenhaal, as Robert Graysmith, whose books about Zodiac inspired the film) and a crime reporter (Robert Downey Jr.), who all become obsessed with, and damaged by, the case. Depiction of Zodiac killings is fairly understated, but still includes point-blank shootings, stabbings, spattered blood; an infant and its mother shown at risk; drug use, drinking, smoking; cops discuss in nongraphic terms a suspect's molestation of children; we see a sex toy suspect owns; strong profanity. 16 and older.)

"Black Snake Moan" (NEW) (Lurid, pulpy, misconceived southern-gothic drama about a sexually ravenous, pathologically promiscuous young white woman (Christina Ricci) who gets beaten and left for dead, and the grizzled, misguided, blues-singing black farmer (Samuel L. Jackson) who decides he'll "cure" her "wickedness" by chaining her to his radiator and making her see the light; distressingly retro view of women, though set in the present, with Ricci perpetually in briefs and midriff-baring, braless tops; blues soundtrack and Jackson in a meaty role are film's positives; their scenes are sexually charged but the two leads do not have a sexual relationship; other explicit sexual situations include her seduction of a boy clearly under 18 -- their coupling occurs off-screen; verbal references, flashbacks hint at her childhood molestation; toplessness; strong profanity; crude, misogynistic sexual slang; racial slurs; drinking, smoking; drug use; fighting; guns. Not for under-17s.)

"Reno 911!: Miami" (NEW) (Feature film based on Comedy Central's cable series is raunchy, profane, often droll, but with too many lame, under-scripted gags; show's improvised style needs more shape in this longer form; the dumber-than-a-box-of-rocks deputies of Reno's (fictional) sheriff's department go to a law enforcement convention in Miami and wind up accidentally in charge of that city for a brief, disastrous while; Thomas Lennon as their commanding officer in short-shorts; Paul Rudd as a drug lord. Explicit comic masturbatory and other sexual situations; topless women; men in g-strings; crude sexual language; very strong profanity; joke about rape; gay stereotypes and humor; gunplay; drinking; smoking; drug use; toilet humor. Not for under-17s.)

"The Number 23" (Jim Carrey in visually inventive but narratively muddle-headed, pseudo-film noirish mess of a thriller that starts out tantalizingly with a kind of mystical numerological mystery, then veers fatally into tiresome psychological claptrap; animal control officer Walter Sparrow's (Carrey) simple life disintegrates after his wife (Virginia Madsen) buys him a novel titled "The Number 23" about a homicide detective (also Carrey); as the cop becomes obsessed with mysticism surrounding the number 23, so does Walter, who keeps seeing himself in re-enactments of the book. Recurring suicide theme -- stylized depictions of throat slitting, jumping out of buildings, hanging, slit wrists; murder victims in pools of blood; semiexplicit sexual situations, some with implied sadomasochism or death obsession; other sexual innuendo; profanity. 16 and older.)


(c) 2007, Washington Post Writers Group.

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Reilly remains as NBC Entertainment chief

NEW YORK (UPI) -- NBC Entertainment President Kevin Reilly Thursday signed a multiyear deal with the U.S. television network.

The contract has been anticipated since January when NBC Universal Chief Executive Officer Jeff Zucker expressed his desire to keep Reilly, Variety said Thursday.

Reilly's re-signing is a victory for the former FX executive hounded by rumors about his future with NBC after the network's poor primetime performance in recent years.

Though fourth in ratings among the major broadcasters, the network has begun gaining momentum, starting with last fall's hit, "My Name is Earl" and the slow-building hit "The Office."


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Hepburn's black dress outfits schools

LAXMIKANTAPUR, India (UPI) -- Doors opened to students and visitors at the first school in India outfitted with proceeds from the sale of Audrey Hepburn's signature little black dress.

The school at Laxmikantapur near Kolkata, formerly Calcutta, complete with computers and teaching aids, will provide an education to about 200 children who otherwise might not get one, the BBC said.

The school is the first of 15 planned to open, thanks to the anonymous bidder who bought the Givenchy-designed dress for more than $900,000. Proceeds from the auction went to the Kolkata-based charity City of Joy Aid, which helps India's poor through a network of schools, clinics, rehabilitation centers and hospital boats.

Designer Hubert de Givenchy donated the dress -- especially designed for Hepburn in her role as Holly Golightly in "Breakfast at Tiffany's" -- to the City of Joy Aid, run by French author and philanthropist Dominique Lapierre, who was on had for the school's opening.

Lapierre said the school was a fitting tribute to Hepburn, who spent the last years of her life helping the poor by working as an ambassador for United Nations Children's Fund.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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'This is Why I'm Hot' hot No. 1 single

NEW YORK (UPI) -- "This Is Why I'm Hot" by Mims zoomed from No. 32 to No. 1 on the Billboard Hot 100, the third biggest leap in the chart's history.

Akon's "Don't Matter" moved up to the No. 2 spot from No. 5.

After topping last week's chart, Justin Timberlake's "What Goes Around... Comes Around" slips to No. 3

Gwen Stefani's "The Sweet Escape" featuring Akon was in the No. 4 spot, a move up from No. 6.

"Cupid's Chokehold" by Gym Class Heroes featuring Fall Out Boy's Patrick Stump moved into No. 5, up from No. 8.

Nelly Furtado's "Say It Right" dropped from No. 3 to No. 6.

Daughtry's "It's Not Over" hung in at No. 7 for a second week.

Fall Out Boy's "This Ain't a Scene, It's an Arms Race," which previously peaked at No. 2, rose to No. 8 from No. 10.

Ludacris' "Runaway Love" featuring Mary J. Blige tumbled from No. 2 to No. 9.

Rihanna's "Break It Off" with Sean Paul blasted from No. 52 to No. 10, aided by its release in the digital market.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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The Hollywood Exclusive

By Marilyn Beck and Stacy Jenel Smith

'Wild Hogs' Quartet of Stars Rarin' for Sequel, Says Travolta/Lawrence Hurrying Into 'The Better Man' Action in Louisiana

John Travolta says he and Tim Allen, Martin Lawrence and William H. Macy are rarin' to get back in the saddle to do a sequel to the big-screen comedy "Wild Hogs," opening today (3/2).

"If it does as well as they think it will do, we probably will," says Travolta, who plays the leader of the four guys whose middle-aged crises prompt them to head out on a motorcycle road trip. "It was four wonderful talents, four wonderful energies and four wonderful people. I got a big kick out of being with them. I really did."

The Touchstone film has gotten mixed reviews, but it drew many out-loud laughs at the El Capitan Theatre premiere the other night from a celebrity crowd that included the likes of Kirstie Alley, Luke Wilson, Kevin Sorbo, Ty Pennington, Felicity Huffman and Raven Symone.

The film's co-star, co-star William H. Macy -- who's gearing up to get on a plane to Capetown, South Africa, to start shooting a romantic comedy with Meg Ryan called "The Deal" -- says, "Truthfully, to get paid for riding motorcycles and hanging out with those guys, I feel like I robbed a bank.'" The film's other star, Martin Lawrence, is also hoping for more adventures of the "Wild Hogs." He says, "I'm ready if they want to make it happen. It was lot of fun to work with those guys."

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MEANWHILE: Travolta has "Hairspray" in the can, and since the big-screen version of "Dallas" doesn't start shooting 'til January 2008, he says, "I'm going to do a movie this summer with my family called 'Old Dads.'" The actor, who's married to actress Kelly Preston, with whom he has two children, Jett, 14, and Ella, 6, says, "I was inspired by Will Smith and his rapport with his son," meaning Will's "Pursuit of Happyness" costar Jaden.

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AND: March is a big month for Lawrence. "I start a new movie with Malcolm Lee called 'The Better Man' about a brother who goes back to his roots and gets some down home lessons," says Lawrence, who'll be filming in Louisiana. Seasons two and three of Lawrence's "Martin" sitcom are being released on DVD this month, and the talent show he's exec producing, "Martin Lawrence Presents The First Amendment Standup Comedy Show" debuts this month on Starz!

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WHERE HIS HEART IS: Former "ER" regular Noah Wyle reports his longtime labor of love, the L.A. based Blank Theatre Company, is finally making its presence known. "The company just keeps growing year after year, and our reputation seems to be getting more and more solid," says the former "ER" regular, who mounts the Young Playwright's Festival at his theatre each year. "We're hoping to prime ourselves as being the regional theater in Los Angeles. Now, we've just got to find the financial support to back our reputation." He adds, "It's also tough to get commitments from actors because as soon as they get a pilot, they leave you in the lurch. It's not like Chicago or New York or San Francisco or Seattle, where all the stage work is. In L.A. you could get a Puppy Chow commercial call back and bail on your play. But hey, you gotta go pay the bills."

Meanwhile, Wyle -- who's making his feature film directorial debut this spring with an indie comedy called "The Prince Test" -- says he's choosing his jobs "very carefully now that I'm on full-time daddy duty." The father of two young'uns says being a dad "certainly focuses my energy. I have a constant smile on my face. I worked for a long time thinking that everything I was doing was for myself, and as soon as my son was born, I knew 'No, no, no, it's got nothing to do with me. It's all for him.' I'm very grateful that 'ER' has given me the ability to be financially secure and take the time to really be at home for the precious years when they actually still want me around before I'm an embarrassment to them."

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WOMAN OF MANY HATS: With pilot season upon us, Jane Seymour says "People are asking me about various things." But the former "Dr. Quinn" doesn't know whether she wants to jump back into the series game full time -- as opposed to something like her recurring "In Case of Emergency" gig. "It would depend on the series and character. I'm raising a couple of 11-year-olds here," says the mother of twin sons Johnny and Kris, in addition to grown son and daughter Katherine and Sean. "I also have my art and my design work -- I have a major line that's launching of home goods and giftable items. So it's not like I have a ton of spare time."

 

AIKEN, S.C. (UPI) -- Attorneys in South Carolina agreed to take a DNA sample from the late singer James Brown to preserve for a possible paternity challenge.

The sampling should be collected and Brown buried within about 10 days at an undisclosed location, said Charleston, S.C. attorney Robert Rosen, who represents Tomi Rae Hynie who said Brown married her and fathered her child.

"This is just to preserve the sample," Rosen told the Charleston (S.C.) Post and Courier. "The court hasn't ruled as to whether anybody is entitled to do a DNA test."

Brown's representatives sought the DNA sample, Rosen said, which will be taken by an expert from the Medical University of South Carolina.

The representatives challenged the paternity of Hynie's 5-year-old son, James J. Brown II. Rosen said the singer's name is on the child's birth certificate and that he acknowledged the boy as his son in his autobiography.

"They have not asked for a paternity test but I'm assuming they will," Rosen told the Post and Courier. "We don't think a test is necessary."

Brown died Christmas Day at age 73. His will does not mention Hynie or her son.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Britney's first ex speaks of drug use

MALIBU, Calif. (UPI) -- Pop singer Britney Spears, now in a California rehabilitation center, abused drugs and nearly overdosed three years ago, her first husband said in an interview.

Jason Alexander, who was married to Spears for 55 hours, said he is bringing up her past because he doesn't want to see Spears dead.

"It freaked me out when I saw she had shaved off her hair; that was clearly a cry for help," Alexander, 25, said in an interview with the Sunday Mirror of London and reprinted in the New York Daily News. "She needs help."

Spears is at Promises, a Malibu, Calif., drug and alcohol rehabilitation center.

Alexander said in the interview he had trouble keeping up with her drug use.

One time Spears nearly overdosed fatally on pure ecstasy as they partied in Las Vegas, Alexander said in the Sunday Mirror interview. She fell unconscious to the floor and he put her in the shower to revive her, he said.

"She wasn't moving," Alexander told the Daily Mirror. "I remember looking down at her all crumpled in the tub with the water coming down. She looked so white and lifeless. I thought she was dead."


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Friend: 'Idol' friend not racy pics' model

POINT PLEASANT, N.J. (UPI) -- Salacious photos posted on the Web purporting to be "American Idol" contestant Antonella Barba of New Jersey, aren't really her, a friend said.

Amanda Coluccio told People magazine she checked out the pictures posted on various Web sites and they "are not Antonella. It's not the same nose, it's not the same face."

Coluccio, who said she speaks to Barba daily by phone, said some photos -- which show Barba in various stages of undress but not completely nude -- were indeed her and were meant for her boyfriend. She said Barba, 20, a Point Pleasant, N.J., native, said she believed the photos were stolen from her computer at Catholic University and distributed online.

Other, more sexually explicit photos, however, are someone else.

"The really bad ones aren't her. I've studied them. ... She's never had (acrylic nail) tips in her life," Coluccio told the Newark (N.J.) Star-Ledger. She's the least slutty person I know."

A representative from Fox network, which airs "Idol," nor show producers said they would comment on contestants still in the race. If one were to be dismissed from the show, then a statement could be released


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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Attorneys reply in Smith appeal case

WEST PALM BEACH, Fla. (UPI) -- The guardian for Anna Nicole Smith's baby filed papers with a Florida appeal court asking it to uphold a ruling giving him Smith's body on her child's behalf.

Richard Milstein asked the court to uphold a lower court ruling that gave him custody of the body as the court-appointed guardian to 5-month-old Dannielynn, TMZ.com said.

Attorneys for Howard K. Stern also filed with the Florida's Fourth Circuit Court of Appeal in West Palm Beach, Fla., answering the appeal filed by Smith's estranged mother, Virgie Arthur, to block burial in the Bahamas.

Broward County Judge Larry Seidlin ruled Thursday that that custody of Anna's remains should go to the child for burial. Her guardian decided that Smith would be buried in the Bahamas next to her son, Daniel, who died in September.

Arthur asked Seidlin to set aside his ruling; he refused and she appealed. Arthur said she wants custody of the body to bury it in Smith's home state of Texas.

Stern, Arthur and Larry Birkhead, one of Smith's former lovers, also are involved in a custody hearing in the Bahamas.


Copyright 2007 by United Press International

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The Hollywood Exclusive

By Marilyn Beck and Stacy Jenel Smith

'RAINES' CUTBACK HAD SILVER LINING FOR JEFF GOLDBLUM/BOB SAGET GETS IN HIS LICKS ON THE L-O-O-NG OSCARS

It looked like bad news for Jeff Goldblum in December, when NBC decided to cut its order for his March 15-debuting "Raines" series from 13 episodes to seven. But the change turned out to be in the actor's favor -- on the big-screen side of his career.

He tells us he's just returned from a trip to Berlin, Poland and Russia, where he did research for his role in Paul Schrader's "Adam Resurrected" -- a role that sounds like a possible tour de force for Jeff.

The story "takes my character through the 1920s and '30s. He's an entertainer in Berlin with a couple of daughters and a wife, and he's Jewish and has to flee when the Nazis come to power," says Goldblum, who adds that Stellan Skarsgard and Willem Dafoe are also in the cast. Before his journey is through, his character is interned in a concentration camp, but finally winds up "in Israel, in 1961, in an institute for camp survivors ... It's from the book by Yoram Kaniuk," he reports. "I'll go to Israel to do some research by and by."

If he'd been tied up doing 13 episodes of "Raines," Jeff says, "I couldn't have done these things." Yet he makes it clear he's bullish about the offbeat series, in which his character is a police detective losing his grip on reality, who hallucinates getting information from the victims of murders he's trying to solve.

"Adam Resurrected" is slated to begin shooting mid-April "in Bucharest, Romania. Then we move on to Israel and shoot there a couple of weeks." If "Raines" snags a renewal, "it wouldn't conflict with the film," says Goldblum. And if it isn't picked up, "There are some other things I'm looking at after that."

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TELL US HOW YOU REALLY FEEL: Bob Saget takes a slap at the clip packages largely responsible for causing Sunday night's Oscars to last a fanny-numbing three hours and 52 minutes with the comment, "How many clips can we watch? And some of them looked like they were made at home with a TiVo."

He also takes exception to the voice-overs that accompanied winners to the stage by pointing out that the announcements included "negative stuff like, 'He has four losses in his past.'" And, referring to comments made by TV personalities covering the red carpet action, Bob says, "They kept bringing up things from the past that are negative -- like horrible styles. I'll tell you, once you show up wearing something that looks like a squid's intestine, you're done for. You'll never live it down. I don't know why we feed on the negative as culture, but we do."

He has only positive things to say about Ellen DeGeneres and is particularly high on the bit that had her vacuuming the floor at the feet of Penelope Cruz. "It was perfect between all the pomp and circumstance," he says.

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MEANWHILE: Right now Saget is waiting for word about the pickup of his "1 vs. 100" series, and preparing an HBO special he expects to shoot in New York next month. He says he's "figuring out what kind of acting, directing stuff I want to do. I love them both." He also continues to track the success of "Farce of the Penguins," his raunchy take-off of the award winning "March of the Penguins" documentary. Released as a DVD in January, it's a best seller, he says, that "shops can't keep in stock."

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SHE'S BAAACK: "Boston Legal" regular Constance Zimmer says it was a shock to her to be invited back to HBO's hit "Entourage" series that starts shooting next month.

"I was fired and banished in the last season finale because I told Ari some secret information," says Zimmer, who plays Dana Gordon, the former lover and nemesis of the megalomaniacal agent Ari Gold (Jeremy Piven) in the show. "I was very excited when they said I was coming back. Dana Gordon is a blessing in disguise. She's a character that people just love and that makes me so happy."

Zimmer also has upcoming the indie film "Chaos Theory" with Ryan Reynolds and Emily Mortimer. "It's a dark comedy about how we breed our own chaos. Once you start worrying about one thing it creates more drama and more worry and more drama until you're completely in a gigantic whirlwind of chaos. I have a great, funny little part that takes me back to my character acting days. The film has a very '50s vibe to it, and I play this funny, gossipy teacher in town who is always up in everyone's business. I've seen it and it's great."

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THE FINAL SAY: Having creative control over its projects was essential to the success of the extraordinary British comedy troupe Monty Python, says former Pythoner Eric Idle -- and he believes more artists should be allowed to experience such control these days. "I think it is art when you've got control of it all, and you're not doing it for commercial reasons but because you're pursuing some dream idea of making it very funny. It's liberating. There's nobody in the way. There are no agents or managers," he explains. "These are just ideal conditions because then you only have art left, really."

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